Befriending the man who killed my family

From The Documentary Podcast by BBC World Service

May 8, 2026 · 27 min

About this episode

The episode explores personal stories of forgiveness and reconciliation in Rwanda thirty years after the genocide against the Tutsi.

Thirty years after the genocide against the Tutsi in Rwanda, some convicted perpetrators are returning to the communities they once devastated. Felin Gakwaya travels to eastern Rwanda to meet both survivors and perpetrators living side by side again. He hears from Daniel Gasangwa, who went to visit the men who killed members of his family after they were released from prison — and told them not to be afraid, because they had been forgiven. He also meets Steven Ngabonziza, whose own path to forgiveness came not first through church, but through war, prison discipline and the slow work of reconciliation. And he hears from Viateur Ruribikiye, a perpetrator who now speaks of confession, repentance and God’s pardon. Through their stories, which include discussions of violence and loss, the programme explores forgiveness not as an abstract idea, but as something lived out in villages, churches, homes and memories that have not gone away. This episode of The Documentary, comes to you from Heart and Soul, exploring personal approaches to spirituality from around the world.

People in this episode

Host: Felin Gakwaya

Guests: Daniel Gasangwa, Steven Ngabonziza, Viateur Ruribikiye

Topics covered

forgiveness
reconciliation
genocide
Rwanda
survivors
perpetrators

Keywords

forgiveness
Rwanda
genocide
reconciliation
survivors
perpetrators
violence
loss

Mentioned in this episode

Places: Rwanda