The Laura Dowling Experience

Darragh Fleming went viral last year for a poem — but this conversation is about everything that came before it. The Cork writer talks to Laura about a childhood spent lost in books, a long detour through sport and self-doubt, and the years he spent convinced he wasn't creative at all.At seventeen, Darragh lost his close friend Irby to suicide, and the grief changed him profoundly. For years afterwards he felt almost nothing — a numbness he didn't recognise as depression — while quietly performing the emotions other people expected of him. He's honest about the survivor's guilt that made him sabotage his own happiness, the panic attack that became his rock bottom, and how therapy and journaling slowly led him back to writing.From there the conversation opens out into the work Darragh is known for now: poetry that reimagines what it means to be a man. He and Laura discuss why anger is so often the only emotion men feel allowed to show, how language like "toxic masculinity" can shape the way boys see themselves, and why he believes emotionally healthier men make life safer for everyone. Warm, funny and full of hope, it's also a conversation about creativity in everyday life and Darragh's belief that the meaning of life is found in the people we share it with.🔑 Key PointsGrief can arrive as numbness, not sadnessAfter losing his friend Irby at seventeen, Darragh didn't feel constant sadness but a flatness he didn't recognise as depression for years.Survivor's guilt can quietly sabotage a lifeHe describes an unconscious sense that he wasn't allowed to be happy, which led him to undo good things whenever they started going well.Writing became a way back to feelingJournaling suggested by his therapist turned naturally into poetry, helping him name emotions he otherwise couldn't reach.Anger is often the only emotion men feel permittedDarragh argues that sadness, rejection and disappointment frequently come out as anger because men aren't given other outlets.Language shapes how boys see themselvesHearing "toxic" almost always paired with "masculinity" can lead young men to believe masculinity itself is something bad.A lighthouse, not a lifeboatRather than trying to rescue everyone, Darragh sees his public work as showing people a way through and reminding them they're not alone.Success can arrive at the right timeHe reflects on being glad his career didn't take off in his twenties, when he wouldn't have been ready to carry it.📚 ResourcesThoughts Too Big — Darragh's long-running mental health blogIf I Ever Have Boys — Darragh FlemingIf I Ever Have Girls — Darragh FlemingWaiting for the Good Guys — Darragh FlemingThe Hole — Darragh Fleming, a poem on depression and copingDangerous Men — Lucas Jones, the poem Darragh's "If I Ever Have Boys" responded toMental health support — Samaritans, freephone 116 123; Pieta, freephone 1800 247 247 or text 51444⏱️ Timestamps00:00 — "My Dad Could Beat Up Your Dad" (cold open)01:13 — Welcome and introduction05:40 — Going viral with "If I Ever Have Boys"14:53 — Why he started writing17:31 — Losing Irby at seventeen18:42 — The numbness he didn't know was depression21:45 — The panic attack, therapy and journaling33:35 — A lighthouse, not a lifeboat35:23 — Masculinity, the manosphere and raising sons42:42 — Language, mental illness and "toxic masculinity"50:30 — "A Snake Named Snake" and his dad01:01:36 — Darragh reads "My Dad Could Beat Up Your Dad"01:03:09 — Advice for young people and the meaning of lifeThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist Dr Fadi joins Laura for an open, practical conversation about pelvic floor health, incontinence, prolapse and the realities of modern obstetrics.Dr Fadi explains how childbirth, ageing and menopause affect the pelvic floor, and why so many women end up living with stress incontinence, prolapse and faecal incontinence in silence. He walks through the full range of treatment options — from physiotherapy and pessaries to urethral bulking, Botox, sacral neuromodulation, robotic surgery, and the mesh procedures paused in Ireland since 2018.The conversation also takes in interstitial cystitis, vaginal oestrogen, the impact of long inductions on older mothers, and the trade-offs women now weigh up between a vaginal delivery and a caesarean section. Dr Fadi closes with a reflection on his time working with Syrian refugees, where he met 13-year-old mothers and a 26-year-old grandmother.🔑 Key Points1. Pelvic floor problems are common and treatable — Stress incontinence, prolapse and faecal incontinence are usually linked to childbirth, not an inevitable part of being a woman.2. Mesh for incontinence has been paused in Ireland since 2018 — Ireland is the only country in the world where this procedure is currently unavailable, and patients are being sent to Spain to access it.3. There is no single fix for incontinence — Treatment depends on the type, from physiotherapy and urethral bulking to mesh slings, Botox into the bladder wall, and sacral neuromodulators.4. Prolapse is not just the womb — Bladder, womb and rectum can all prolapse, each with their own grade and treatment pathway.5. Pessaries give women back some control — Different types of pessary can hold a prolapse in place, and many women can learn to manage their own at home.6. Faecal incontinence is more common than women admit — Third and fourth degree tears at delivery can damage the anal sphincter, and primary repair at the time of birth gives the best outcome.7. Vaginal oestrogen is a low-risk, high-impact tool — It can ease overactive bladder, recurrent UTIs, dryness, and slow the progression of prolapse after menopause.8. Older mothers face different trade-offs — Long inductions, instrumental deliveries and unplanned caesareans are more common, which is why some women are now actively asking for a planned section.📚 ResourcesLove Your Vulva — Laura DowlingfabÜ Hello HealingContinence Foundation of Ireland⏱️ Timestamps01:46 — Introducing Dr Fadi and urogynaecology02:49 — Why pelvic floor problems happen04:14 — Assessing pelvis and baby size before delivery05:09 — Robotic surgery and vault prolapse06:34 — Stress incontinence and mesh as the gold standard09:01 — Why mesh has been paused in Ireland12:31 — Sending Irish patients to Spain for mesh14:25 — Botox for overactive bladder and Interstim15:43 — Faecal incontinence and tears at delivery19:17 — Interstitial cystitis and hyaluronic acid21:21 — Types and grades of prolapse24:25 — How a pessary works28:01 — Surgery for prolapse34:18 — Vaginal oestrogen and pelvic floor36:08 — Epidurals and instrumental delivery37:25 — Why more women are asking for caesareans45:00 — Working with Syrian refugees48:32 — Advice for young people and the meaning of lifeThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Laura sits down with MEP Maria Walsh for a wide-ranging conversation about women, power and what is shifting in Europe right now. Maria has just returned from the UN Commission on the Status of Women in New York, where for the first time in seventy years member states could not agree a final text on access to justice for women.She talks honestly about online misogyny, the deepfakes already circulating in Irish secondary schools, conversion therapy, and the website created about her during the 2019 election that is still live today. Alongside that, she opens up about internalised homophobia, the loneliness of political life, and growing up as the gay Rose of Tralee at a time when Ireland was shifting on marriage equality.The conversation also moves through period poverty, FGM, the underfunding of women's healthcare, the pink tax, and what it would take to close the gap on cardiovascular care, menopause and reproductive health. It is a frank look at the work still ahead and the toll it takes on the women trying to do it.🔑 Key PointsThe UN couldn't agree on access to justice for women — For the first time in seventy years the Commission on the Status of Women failed to find consensus, after the US tabled eight late amendments including the definition of a woman.Deepfakes are already in Irish secondary schools — 99% of generated deepfakes are pornographic and 96% of victims are women and young girls, with nudification apps making explicit content from a single photo.Online attacks follow women in politicsA website created during the 2019 election is still live, and Coco's Law catches those who share content but not those who build or host the apps.Conversion therapy is still legal in most of the EUOnly eight EU countries have banned it, and Ireland's commitment sits inside the programme for government.Women's healthcare is underfundedMore research funding has gone into male baldness than endometriosis, and there are only six menopause clinics across Ireland.Cardiovascular care is still built around menHeart attack symptoms are taught through male presentation, leaving women under-treated when it matters.The pink tax keeps quietly costing womenRazors, dry cleaning and a 23% VAT rate on sunscreen all add up across a lifetime.Politics takes a real personal tollMaria speaks openly about loneliness, comfort eating, and learning to take up space in Brussels.📚 ResourcesUN Commission on the Status of WomenCoco's LawILGA-EuropeBelong ToWomen for ElectionSee Her ElectedRileyHope FoundationRuhamaEsker HouseHer Last Search (Croí)⏱️ Timestamps03:39 — Back from the UN Commission on the Status of Women07:33 — Why the US tabled eight amendments at the eleventh hour12:37 — Deepfakes, disinformation and the 90% statistic15:04 — Conversion therapy and the EU debate19:23 — The Burke website that is still live27:38 — Deepfakes in Irish secondary schools35:43 — What policy needs to do, and Ireland's chance to lead40:53 — Cardiovascular care and Her Last Search45:06 — Pink tax, menopause clinics and the funding gap49:29 — Why women are still underrepresented in politics53:01 — Period poverty, Riley and Any Time of the Month58:25 — Loneliness and learning to take up space59:30 — Calcutta, Hope Foundation and human traffickingThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🎧 Episode DescriptionIn this episode, Michelle Flynn shares her deeply personal and professional insight into birth trauma, and why it’s not always about what happens, but how it’s experienced.Drawing on her own journey through pregnancy anxiety and her work as a perinatal psychotherapist, Michelle explains how trauma can live in the nervous system, showing up long after the moment has passed. From hypervigilance and intrusive thoughts to sensory triggers that bring the body straight back into the experience, she breaks down why these reactions happen and what they actually mean.Together, Michelle and Laura unpack the importance of feeling safe, seen and supported, both for patients and for healthcare professionals. This really comes back to understanding your body and how trauma can show up differently for each of us.📚 Mentioned in this EpisodePostnatal DepressionA type of depression that can occur after childbirth, affecting mood, energy, and ability to care for yourself or your baby.Postnatal AnxietyA condition involving excessive worry, fear, or intrusive thoughts during the postpartum period.Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)A mental health condition involving intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviours, which can present during pregnancy or postpartum.Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)A condition that can develop after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event, including childbirth.Perinatal Mental HealthMental health during pregnancy and the early years after birth, typically up until a child is around two years old, when individuals may be more vulnerable to anxiety and mood disorders.Somatic Experiencing (Peter Levine)A body-based trauma therapy focused on how the nervous system stores and processes traumatic experiences.The Body Keeps the Score - Dr Bessel van der KolkA widely recognised book exploring how trauma is stored in the body and how it can be treated.EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing)A psychotherapy approach used to help people process and recover from traumatic memories.Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)A structured therapy that focuses on identifying and changing unhelpful thought and behaviour patterns.MBRRACE-UK ReportA UK report examining maternal deaths and inequalities, including higher risks among Black and ethnic minority women.⏱️ Timestamps00:00 - What is birth trauma02:00 - Michelle’s personal pregnancy experience04:00 - Pregnancy anxiety and early fears07:30 - Feeling dismissed and unsupported10:30 - Who is more vulnerable to trauma20:00 - PTSD in healthcare professionals24:00 - Communication and consent in care28:00 - Can trauma be prevented36:00 - The lemon experiment and body response45:00 - Understanding somatic therapy50:00 - Why CBT may not work for traumaThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🎧 Episode DescriptionHow many women have been told that pain is just part of being a woman?For many women, painful or heavy periods become something they learn to live with. In this conversation, periods are reframed as something far more important - a vital sign that reflects what’s happening across the whole body, not just a monthly inconvenience.Through real clinical stories, we hear how women can spend years feeling exhausted, run down, or unwell without ever realising the root cause. These symptoms are normalised, when in reality they need to be recognised and supported much earlier.Drawing on decades of clinical experience, Mary shares how early intervention can prevent long-term conditions like PCOS and endometriosis. The discussion also expands into menopause, hormone therapy, and the importance of lifestyle - from nutrition and sleep to stress and daily habits - in supporting the body.Alongside the science, the episode reflects on modern life - the pressure to do too much, the importance of boundaries, and the need to delegate and share the load.At its core, this episode is about listening to your body, questioning what doesn’t feel right, and giving yourself permission to take your health seriously.🔑 Key PointsYour period is a vital signYour menstrual cycle reflects overall health, yet many women are never taught what is normal and what isn’t.Severe pain and heavy bleeding aren’t normalSymptoms like prolonged periods, extreme pain, or vomiting are often dismissed, but they signal underlying imbalance that should be investigated.Early intervention changes everythingAddressing irregular periods in teenage years can prevent long-term conditions like PCOS and endometriosis.Hormones affect the whole bodyImbalances don’t just impact periods - they influence energy, mood, weight, skin, and long-term health outcomes.Lifestyle is the foundation of hormone healthNutrition, sleep, exercise, and gut health all play a key role in regulating hormones and supporting the body.Conditions like PCOS are often missedWeight gain, acne, and irregular cycles are common early signs, yet many women go undiagnosed for years.Hormonal support can restore balanceTreatments like progesterone and metformin can help regulate cycles and improve symptoms when used appropriately.Women are doing too muchChronic stress, over-responsibility, and lack of boundaries can impact hormone health and overall wellbeing.📚 Mentioned in this EpisodeIt’s Probably Your Period by Mary RyanMary’s book focused on understanding menstrual health and early interventionPolycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS)A hormonal condition that can affect periods, weight, skin, and fertilityEndometriosisA condition where tissue similar to the womb lining grows outside the uterus, often causing severe painHormone Replacement Therapy (HRT)Treatment used to relieve symptoms of menopause by replacing hormonesProgesteroneA hormone involved in regulating the menstrual cycle and supporting pregnancyMetforminA medication commonly used for type 2 diabetes, also used in managing PCOSInsulin ResistanceA condition where the body doesn’t respond properly to insulin, often linked to PCOSProstaglandinsHormone-like substances that can cause inflammation and menstrual cramps⏱️ Timestamps01:00 – Periods as a vital sign02:30 – What a normal period looks like04:00 – Severe pain and inflammation06:30 – Early intervention and prevention08:30 – PCOS, weight gain and acne11:30 – Treatment and metformin14:30 – Hormone balance and long-term health16:30 – Menopause and progesterone18:30 – Spotting, flooding and hormone changes20:30 – HRT and hormone therapy22:30 – Testosterone and brain fog24:00 – Fibroids and prevention25:30 – Women doing too much27:00 – Delegation and sharing the load28:30 – Relationships, stress and health impact30:00 – Raising resilient children31:30 – Loss, grief and perspective33:30 – Life lessons and self-worth35:00 – Final advice for young peopleThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🎧 Episode DescriptionHannah Daly talks openly about the long path to understanding her brain. Growing up, she knew she experienced the world differently, but dyslexia and dyspraxia seemed to explain enough at the time. It wasn’t until much later that she began to question whether there was more to it.A period of intense physical and cognitive symptoms during perimenopause became a turning point. As her ability to cope and mask began to unravel, it led her to seek answers - and eventually to diagnoses of ADHD and autism. What follows is a process of looking back, reinterpreting her life, and starting to understand herself in a completely different way.🔑 Key PointsGrowing up feeling different without the language for itHannah describes always experiencing the world differently, but early diagnoses of dyslexia and dyspraxia seemed to explain enough at the time.Masking and the effort of trying to fit inMuch of her life was shaped by adapting to environments and expectations, often suppressing her own needs.Perimenopause as a turning pointA sudden wave of physical and cognitive symptoms made it harder to cope and brought everything to the surface.The link between hormones and neurodivergenceHormonal changes intensified underlying ADHD and autistic traits, including memory issues, overwhelm, and sensory sensitivity.Late diagnosis of ADHD and autismThrough seeking answers, Hannah went through an assessment process and received both diagnoses.Looking back with new understandingShe began to reinterpret her life, recognising patterns that had always been there but previously misunderstood.Unmasking and redefining identityDiagnosis allowed her to move away from people-pleasing and start living more in line with who she is.Understanding your brain as self-compassionLearning how her brain works helped her develop better strategies and a more supportive way of living.📚 Mentioned in this EpisodeADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder)A neurodevelopmental condition affecting attention, impulse control, and energy regulation.Autism (Autism Spectrum Condition)A lifelong condition affecting communication, sensory processing, and social interaction.PerimenopauseA hormonal transition phase that can impact mood, cognition, and physical wellbeing.ADHD, Autism, and Hormones (Emerging Research Area)Growing research explores how hormonal changes can intensify neurodivergent traits.ADHD Ireland - Support & U-Map ProgrammeResources and support for ADHD in Ireland.Autism and Menopause (Further Reading)Explores how menopause can affect autistic individuals.Odd Girl Out - Laura James (Book)A memoir about late autism diagnosis.Dr Mary Doherty - Autistic Doctors InternationalAdvocate and founder supporting autistic professionals.Wim Hof MethodBreathing and cold exposure techniques.⏱️ Timestamps00:00 – Asking for accommodations and sensory needs02:30 – What masking looks like in everyday life04:00 – Growing up feeling “othered”07:00 – Finding purpose through occupational therapy10:30 – Writing her book and sharing her story11:30 – Sudden health episode and onset of symptoms14:30 – Perimenopause, HRT, and turning point17:00 – ADHD and autism diagnosis19:00 – Reframing her life after diagnosis23:00 – Sensory needs, routines, and daily coping27:00 – ADHD traits, focus, and conversation style31:00 – Energy, burnout, and pacing36:00 – Managing overwhelm and regulation strategies42:00 – Sleep, routines, and nervous system support47:00 – Parenting, relationships, and support systems52:00 – Medication, exercise, and what helps56:00 – Final reflections and helping other womenThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🎧 Episode DescriptionThis conversation with Ger Killian offers a thoughtful and honest look at what it really means to feed children in today’s world. As co-founder of The Lunch Bag, Ger has spent years navigating the realities of school meals - from supply chains and budgets to the emotional responses of parents and children alike.What emerges is a story not just about food, but about trust. Trust from parents who want reassurance their child will eat. Trust from children learning to try new things. And trust in a system that is still evolving, trying to balance immediate needs with long-term impact.This episode gently challenges assumptions, reminding us that meaningful change takes time. It invites us to think more deeply about how we support children - not just nutritionally, but emotionally and socially too.🔑 Key PointsWhy “safe foods” matterRemoving familiar foods like chicken goujons revealed how important predictable meals are for children, especially those under stress.The complexity of feeding children at scaleDelivering meals involves logistics, cost pressures, regulations, and nutritional standards that most people never see.The unintended consequences of a welfare modelTargeting meals at certain children can create stigma and affect how children engage with food in school.The role of culture in what children eatHistorical and cultural influences shape how children respond to unfamiliar foods and new meals.Parental instinct and food securityParents often send extra lunches not out of distrust, but from a deep instinct to ensure their child is fed.The importance of education around foodWithout teaching children what they are eating, meals can feel unfamiliar and disengaging rather than supportive.A long-term opportunity for changeSchool meals have the potential to improve not just nutrition, but equality, behaviour, and future outcomes.📚 Mentioned in this EpisodeThe Lunch BagA leading Irish school meal provider delivering fresh, nutritionally balanced lunches to schools nationwide.Website - https://www.thelunchbag.ie/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/thelunchbag_/Healthy Ireland GuidelinesNational nutritional standards that define what a balanced school meal should include in terms of protein, vegetables, and overall health.World Food ProgrammeA global organisation that highlights how access to school meals, particularly for girls, can improve education and long-term outcomes.EU Child GuaranteeA European initiative focused on ensuring children have access to essential services, including nutritious food and education.BallymaloeAn Irish food producer and cookery school that supported the development of nutritious sauces for school meals.Spice of Life (Cork)A food supplier that helped create large-scale, nutritionally balanced sauces for school meal programmes.Willowbrook (Belfast)A supplier providing fresh fruit and vegetables used in school meals across Ireland.⏱️ Timestamps00:00 - Introduction to Ger and The Lunch Bag03:00 - Building a school meal service from scratch07:00 - The rollout of free school meals10:00 - Welfare vs progressive school meal models13:00 - Why children disengage from meals over time18:30 - How school meals are produced and delivered27:00 - Food culture and food neophobia in Ireland32:00 - The chicken goujon controversy36:00 - Reformulating “safe foods” for children40:00 - Nutrition, lentils, and hidden improvements48:00 - Food waste and misunderstanding the system54:00 - What needs to change moving forwardThanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.