The Love Doctor

Today on the show, I’m talking to the host of the Rethinking Manhood podcast, Destyn Land. Destyn and I discuss men and sex. Sounds simple but when you start to layer in shame, silence, and how by grade 3 you’re already comparing penis size–it gets a lot more complicated. I first saw Destyn’s work when a friend shared one of his posts on Instagram. It was a beautiful piece about men and how society has created this pressure to prove how “straight” you are. This could be by catcalling women or making homophobic comments. Destyn’s posts are always thoughtful, well researched and when I found out he had a podcast, I just had to listen. Resources from the ShowDestyn Land: @destynforgreatnessRethinking Manhood Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/3bQw3DWTRuCmlGXFvYrVya?si=c26149d4a7474d36Instagram: @rethinkingmanhood Boys and Sex by Peggy Orenstein: https://www.peggyorenstein.com/boysandsexEuphoria on CraveHeartstopper on Netflix and ComicsBi-erasure definition: https://www.glaad.org/bisexualThe Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by bell hooks

Today on the show, I am answering your questions about opening up relationships and BDSM. But I’m not answering them alone. I am honoured to share my interview with Registered Clinical Counsellor, Sarah Watson, who helps me navigate your questions surrounding trauma and sexuality. References from the Show!Sarah Watson: https://sarahwatsontherapy.com/Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel S.F. Heller: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9547888-attachedPolysecure by Jessica Fern: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52569124-polysecureCome As You Are by Emily Nagoski: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Come-as-You-Are/Emily-Nagoski/9781476762111Allura Website $50 webinars: Sex and Trauma : https://static1.squarespace.com/static/5b162a5675f9ee6cc62c56b5/t/61a68fc8cdbab21c1afb1d71/1638305736878/Sex+%2B+Trauma+Flyer.pdfSelf Harm Resources: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/cutting-and-self-harm.htmSexual Configurations Theory: https://www.academia.edu/37691857/_SCT_Zine_Mapping_Your_Sexuality_From_Sexual_Orientation_to_Sexual_Configurations_TheorySue Johnson: A(ccessible)R(esponsive)E(ngaged) you there for me? Debunking 5 Common Myths About Kink: https://www.slice.ca/sex-sessions-art-debunking-common-myths-about-kink/5 Things Science Has Taught Us About BDSM: https://www.sexandpsychology.com/blog/2021/8/16/5-things-science-has-taught-us-about-bdsm/B.C.’s Capital City Leads the Country in Trans and Non-binary Representation:https://www.coastmountainnews.com/news/b-c-s-capital-city-leads-the-country-in-trans-and-non-binary-representation/

Today on the show, we are talking about what you missed in your high school sex education and how puppets may be the best way to talk about sex. In our first ever group interview on the podcast, I talk to Hannah Mariko Bell, Sophie Underwood, and Kiley Verbowski, about our experience co-creating the play Going All The Way. We talk about our own experiences with sex education and how creating art has helped us navigate our own sexual journeys. Resources from the Show! Going All The Way Tickets: skam.ca/going-all-the-wayTheatre SKAM: https://skam.ca/What is Intersectionality? Kimberlé Crenshaw: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ViDtnfQ9FHc&ab_channel=NationalAssociationofIndependentSchools%28NAIS%29Schitt's Creek Star Dan Levy on Playing Pansexual: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4IXXM0A6vg&ab_channel=LarryKingSchitt's Creek Wine Analogy Scene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrHYlJTqud0&ab_channel=RozCoreyClarkJapanese Fertility Festivals: https://allabout-japan.com/en/article/4349/

Today on the show, I am talking about the Don’t Say Gay bill in Florida and why not talking about sexual orientation and gender identity is a bad idea for ALL kids, regardless of how they identify. I also share my interview with queer artist, sexual health educator, and doula, Simone Blais. Simone and I discuss the importance of peer to peer education, how we are constantly learning as educators ourselves, and she has basically convinced me that anyone who is wanting to have a child should have a doula. And there are ways to make that happen with support from our communities. Resources from the Show! Simone Blais: https://www.simone-blais.com/aboutBEDucated link: http://beducate.me/thelovedoctorCoupon Code: LOVEDOCTORNesting Doula Collective: https://www.nestingdoulacollective.com/Florida Legislature Passes “Don’t Say Gay” Bill to Restrict LGBTQ Topics in Elementary Schools: https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/florida-bassed-don-t-say-gay-bill-lgbtq-schools-1.6377169What is the US State of Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” Bill? https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/what-is-the-us-state-of-florida-e2-80-99s-so-called-e2-80-98don-e2-80-99t-say-gay-e2-80-99-bill/ar-AAVsjrANative Youth Sexual Health Network: https://www.nativeyouthsexualhealth.com/Sexy Health Carnival: https://www.nativeyouthsexualhealth.com/sexy-health-carnivalOptions for Sexual Health Sex Sense Line: 1-800-739-7367 https://www.optionsforsexualhealth.org/sex-sense/Island Sexual Health Texting Line: https://www.islandsexualhealth.org/British Columbia Curriculum on Sexual Health:  https://www.curriculum.gov.bc.ca/sites/curriculum.gov.bc.ca/files/curriculum/physical-health-education/en_physical-health-education_k-9.pdf

Today on the show, I’m giving you my perspective on the Freedom Convoy (I’m so sorry, it’s a whole thing and I have received a ton of questions about it!) and answering your questions on how to not compare yourself to past lovers. It can be a real buzzkill in the bedroom if you’re like “oh, how did they do it? Am I doing it as well as them?!” I also share my interview with social worker, host of Allyship is a Verb podcast, and LGBTQ+ educator, Chris Angel Murphy. Chris Angel and I get vulnerable in this episode and also share advice on how not to be an asshole on dating apps. Resources from the Show!BEDucated Link: http://beducate.me/thelovedoctorBEDucated Coupon code: LOVEDOCTORChris Angel Murphy: https://www.chrisangelmurphy.com/Instagram: @gendersexualityinfoAllyship is a Verb Podcast: https://www.allyshipisaverb.com/Sissy: A Coming-Of-Gender Story: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/40984365-sissyFreedom Convoy Article: https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/trucker-freedom-convoy-new-normal-1.6355574

Welcome to Season 3! Today on the show, I’m answering your questions about IUDs, libido, and cramping–are they all related? Are they happening because of the IUD? I also share my interview with Dallas Barnes where we do a deep dive on contraception methods. In particular, we answer your questions about what it’s like after having an IUD removed, our initial journeys with fertility awareness methods and addressing the pros and cons of hormonal versus non-hormonal birth control.  BEDucated Link: http://beducate.me/thelovedoctorCoupon Code: LOVEDOCTORResources from the Show! Dallas Barnes @reyahealthReya Health: https://www.reyahealth.ca/Options for Sexual Health Contraception Guide: https://www.optionsforsexualhealth.org/facts/birth-control/methods/iud/#1550008055259-d77f52cd-09ee4323-f0d5Debunking Desire: https://www.debunkingdesire.com/A Survey of Young Women’s Perceptions of the Influence of the Levonorgestrel-Intrauterine System or Copper-Intrauterine Device on Sexual Desire: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31395237/The Sexual Acceptability of Intrauterine Contraception: A Qualitative Study of Young Adult Women: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1363/47e4515?sid=nlm%3ApubmedCounseling about IUDs: A Mixed-Methods Analysis: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1363/46e0814Association of Short-term Bleeding and Cramping Patterns with Long-Acting Reversible Contraceptive Method Satisfaction: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4275360/In The Flo book by Alyssa Vitti: https://intheflobook.com/

Today on the show, I’m answering your questions about accessing inclusive sexual health care and what to do if your doctor has very different values than you. Like will they still offer you an IUD if you’re single and queer? I also interview social media personality and YouTuber, Rachel Leary. We talk about what it’s like sharing your life online as a woman, the struggles of trying to date as an influencer, and what she has learned about sexual health from starting her own podcast, Rated R with Rach Leary. Resources from the Show!Rachel LearyYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/rachelleary6Instagram: @rachleary Podcast: @ratedrpodcast My interview on Rachel’s Podcast! https://open.spotify.com/episode/73GtlRnok3dyVkUpBtUqhh?si=63013ec67e884923Dan Savage Revolutionized Sex. Then the Revolution Came for Him: https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/09/dan-savage-advice-savage-love-criticism-interview.html@decolonizemyself @zapatistarising ‘One-size doesn’t fit all’: Understanding healthcare practitioners’ perceptions, attitudes and behaviours towards sexual and reproductive health and rights in low resource settings’: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7316327/How to Talk To With Your Doctor about Sex: https://www.healthgrades.com/right-care/sexual-health/how-to-talk-with-your-doctor-about-sexOnline STI Testing:https://getcheckedonline.com/Pages/default.aspx

Today on the show, I’m answering your questions about queer representation in the media and how to maintain independence in a relationship. As someone who literally works 10 feet away from their partner all day, it’s something I have thought about a lot! I also share my interview with the one and only, Joan Price. This 78 year old Senior Sexpert - by the way, happy birthday Joan! - spends her time talking out loud about senior sex. We talk about the myths that people have about sexuality and aging, share advice on how to navigate conversations with new sexual partners, and how humour is essential to great sex. Resources from the Show!Find Joan and her books, webinars, and blog at https://joanprice.com.Naked at Our Age with Joan Price Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/JoanPriceAuthor/Twitter: https://twitter.com/JoanPriceInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/thejoanprice/ View Joan Price Talks Out Loud About Senior SexAuthor of award-winning books Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex and Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality after Losing Your Beloved.Co-creator of “jessica drake's Guide to Wicked Sex: Senior Sex,” winner 2019 AV award, AASECT (American Assn. of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists)Resident Senior Sexpert for Hot Octopuss Senior Sex HubFor senior sex news and views, subscribe to my newsletter: http://eepurl.com/cx2Nab.The Pervasive Reality of Anti-Black Racism in Canada: https://www.bcg.com/en-ca/publications/2020/reality-of-anti-black-racism-in-canadaBill 2 is “the most transphobic bill ever proposed in Quebec” activist says: prohttps://montrealgazette.com/news/local-news/bill-2-is-the-most-transphobic-bill-ever-proposed-in-quebec-activist-saysPetition: Withdrawal of Certain Sections of Bill 2:  https://www.assnat.qc.ca/en/exprimez-votre-opinion/petition/Petition-9319/index.htmlReality TV and Queer Identities: https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F978-3-030-14215-5But How Many Are We? LGBTQ+ Stats and Stigmas: https://yr.media/identity/but-how-many-are-we-lgbtq-stats-and-stigmas/LGBTQ Stats: https://www.lgbtqstats.org/about

Today on the show, I’m answering your questions about whether gay men can donate blood here in Canada  and how to feel like you’re part of the LGBTQ2S+ community as a bisexual. I also share my interview with the Halal Sexpert, Dr. Shaakira Abdullah. We talk about the workshops she teaches, such as Get Cliterate and What That Mouth Do? Oral sex, Fellatio, and foreplay, and if there is space in the sexual health world for educators from very different perspectives. Resources from the Show! Dr. Shaakira Abdullah: ​​https://linktr.ee/thehalalsexpert https://the-halal-sexpert.myshopify.comInstagram @thehalalsexpertWhere To Get A Vulva Puppet: https://www.thebodyagency.com/collections/all-productsLEAH10 for 10% everything on the Body Agency’s websiteUnderstanding general population impact and opportunities from changes to blood donation deferral screening and criteria for men who have sex with men: https://www.blood.ca/en/research/understanding-general-population-impact-and-opportunities-changes-blood-donation-0About Men Who Have Sex With Men: Why We Talk About This Screening Criterionhttps://www.blood.ca/en/blood/am-i-eligible-donate-blood/about-msmLegality of Eligibility to Donate Blood: https://www.tcwalkerlawyers.com/legality-of-eligibility-requirements-to-donate-blood/Men Who Have Sex With Men: https://www.blood.co.uk/who-can-give-blood/men-who-have-sex-with-men/How To Be A Bisexual+ Ally By Challenging these Bi+ Myths Everyday https://www.forbes.com/sites/jamiewareham/2020/09/16/how-to-be-a-bisexual-lgbtq-ally-and-challenge-these-top-bi-myths-everyday/?sh=704e970f10eaScarleteen Website: www.Scarleteen.org

Today on the show, we’re talking all things birth control - like why is there no male birth control (other than condoms), how do you choose one that’s right for you, what are the side effects, and who should be thinking about using contraception? I also share my interview with Dallas Barnes, the founder and CEO of Reya Health. Dallas and I talk about our journeys of trial and error with different types of birth control and answer your questions about hormonal versus non-hormonal methods and how to talk to your doctor about contraception.Resources from the show! Dallas Barnes @reyahealthReya Health: https://www.reyahealth.ca/What Does the Pope Have to Do with Birth Control Pills? https://www.simplehealth.com/blog/the-pope-and-your-birth-controlCombined Hormonal Contraception and Its Effect on Mood: A Critical Review https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13625187.2016.1217327?journalCode=iejc20This is Your Brain on Birth Control by Sarah Hill https://www.sarahehill.com/your-brain-on-birth-control/Does the Pill Really Cause Mood Swings? https://www.bustle.com/articles/118631-does-the-pill-cause-mood-swings-how-hormonal-birth-control-affects-your-moodMale Birth Control Study Killed After Men Complain of Side Effects: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2016/11/03/500549503/male-birth-control-study-killed-after-men-complain-about-side-effectsWhat Hormones Are In Nexplanon? https://gynraleigh.com/what-hormones-are-in-nexplanon/A Qualitative Study of Young Women's Beliefs About Intrauterine Devices: Fear of Infertility: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jmwh.12425Nexplanon-Arm Implant Birth Control: https://www.theguardian.pe.ca/opinion/national-perspectives/nexplanon-a-3-year-birth-control-implant-is-now-approved-for-use-in-canada-456342/CBC News: Texas Abortion Ban Now Law: https://www.cbc.ca/listen/live-radio/1-9-cbc-news-the-world-this-hourTexas Law That Bans Abortion Before Many Women Know They’re Pregnant Takes Effect: https://www.npr.org/2021/09/01/1033171800/texas-abortion-ban-supreme-court-

Today on the show we’re doing things a little different. I share my interview with sex educator, Cassandra Corrado and we talk about the assumptions that people make about you when you’re a sex educator--like “you’re always down for sex” or have experienced every type of sex we teach about. We also answer the many questions I’ve received from listeners about sex after trauma and sexual assault. It’s a difficult topic and one that is important for us to discuss. Resources from the Show Cassandra Corrado: www.cassandracorrado.comInstagram: @feministsexedEpisode 8: Healthy Sex After Trauma Is Possible. Here’s How: https://cassandracorrado.com/you-deserve-good-sex/National Sexual Violence Resource Centre (US): www.nsvrc.orgNational Sexual Assault Hotline (US): www.rainn.org Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868Available to young Canadians between 5 to 29 years old who are seeking 24-hour confidential and anonymous care with professional counsellors.Hope for Wellness 24/7 Help Line (Canada): 1-855-242-3310Available to all Indigenous peoples across Canada who are seeking immediate crisis intervention.Help Starts Here: British Columbia Sexual Assault Resources: https://www2.gov.bc.ca/assets/gov/law-crime-and-justice/criminal-justice/bc-criminal-justice-system/if-victim/publications/hsh-english-sexual-assault.pdfPeggy Orenstein Boys and Sex https://www.peggyorenstein.com/boysandsexGood Morning America Interview with Peggy Orenstein: https://www.peggyorenstein.com/video-newYes, No, Maybe So: A Sexual Inventory Stocklist: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/yes_no_maybe_so_a_sexual_inventory_stocklist

Today on the show I'm getting into TikTok "hot girl" filters, answering your questions about what to do if your kid walks in on you masturbating and what to do about erectile dysfunction. I also share my interview with Chris Angel Murphy (they/them) of Gender Sexuality Info and honestly, it felt like I was having an intimate conversation with a dear friend. I am so honoured that Chris Angel shared their story of identity and how normalizing questioning as a lifelong orientation might open up some pretty amazing and pleasurable experiences. Resources from the Show!Chris Angel Murphy Instagram: @gendersexualityinfohttps://campsite.bio/gendersexualityinfoSex Positive Talks to Have With Your Kids by Melissa Pintor CarnageyInstagram: @sexpositive_families Boys and Sex by Peggy OrensteinThe Complicated Truth About Social Media and Body Imagehttps://www.bbc.com/future/article/20190311-how-social-media-affects-body-imageLizzo And More Are Sharing Before And After Videos Of Themselves With Filters To Promote Body Positivity: https://www.buzzfeed.com/alexalisitza/body-positivity-kendrick-lamar-tiktok-trendGet Roman https://www.getroman.com/Is Erectile Dysfunction Psychological? https://www.healthline.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/psychologicalPsychological Determinants of Erectile Dysfunction Among Middle-Aged Men: https://www.nature.com/articles/ijir201434

Today on the show I’m answering your questions about oral sex and how to navigate differing religious views on sexuality, and how bi wife energy might make you even sexier. I also share my interview with YouTuber, Joe Lee. Joe and I talk about bisexuality, sharing your life online, and what it’s like to be bi guys in the gay community. Resources from the Show Joe Lee YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/justjoelee/videosInstagram: @justjoeleeReflecting on Masculinity: Gym Culture, Gender Roles, Men's Makeup (with part of our interview!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Nn8XX640I4Our Experience as a Bi Couple in the Gay Community: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcsfaydsI2U&t=621sComing Out On Your Own Terms: It's Okay to Take Your Time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cp7c6Oyvc8Marsha P. Johnson Biography: https://www.biography.com/activist/marsha-p-johnsonHow LGBTQ Pride Month Became a Branded Holiday (Vox): https://www.vox.com/2018/6/25/17476850/pride-month-lgbtq-corporate-explainedLego Unveils “Everyone Is Awesome!” Pride Set: https://www.starobserver.com.au/news/lego-unveils-everyone-is-awesome-pride-set/203626Pela Pride Collection: https://pelacase.ca/collections/iphone-12-pro-max-caseBud Light Pride: https://www.budlight.ca/ca_en/PrideYes, No, Maybe So: A Sexual Inventory Checklist https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/yes_no_maybe_so_a_sexual_inventory_stocklistAfter Another Attack Targeting Muslims, Critics Demand Promised Online Hate Legislation: https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/anti-hate-legislation-online-london-attack-1.6059915Is Oral Sex Permitted in Islam? https://hadithoftheday.com/is-oral-sex-permitted-in-islam/Is Oral Sex Between a Husband and Wife Permitted in Islam? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9GfgwlZyeY&ab_channel=HudaTVMuslim Twitter Asks: Is Oral Sex Permitted in Islam? https://www.amaliah.com/post/45079/is-oral-sex-permissable-dj-khaled-talks-about-sexSeminal Questions: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2006/jan/17/worlddispatch.egyptSeason 1: Episodes 8 & 9 with Percy and Episodes 10 & 11 with Clary!