26 | The 'Was it really that bad?" Thought Spiral..

About this episode

Erika Leon explores the confusing thoughts survivors of narcissistic abuse face when questioning the severity of their experiences.

One of the most confusing parts of recovery after narcissistic abuse or coercive control is the moment you catch yourself wondering: "Was it really that bad?" In this episode of The Messy Middle, Erica dives into the painful spiral so many survivors experience after leaving an abusive relationship. The memories start to soften. The good moments rise to the surface. The loneliness feels louder than the harm. And before you know it, you're questioning your own reality all over again. If you've ...

People in this episode

Host: Erika Leon

Topics covered

• narcissistic abuse
• coercive control
• recovery
• mental health
• survivor experience

Keywords

• narcissistic abuse
• coercive control
• recovery
• survivor
• mental health
• relationship trauma

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• 24 | The “Oh Hell No” Phase of Healing: When All You See are Red Flags · May 21, 2026 · 18 min
• 23 | Dating After Abuse: Slower, Safer Sparks · May 14, 2026 · 16 min
• 22 | Financial Fear After Narcissistic Abuse: What Nobody Talks About · May 7, 2026 · 18 min
• 21 | The Quiet Grief of "Wasted Years" · April 23, 2026 · 21 min