The Midlife Reset: Sleep, Strength & Joyful Living for Women 50+

You know the feeling. You wake up with good intentions, maybe you’ve planned to go for a walk, start a new habit, or finally finish that project. And then… it hits. That tiny, whispering thought in your mind that slowly chips away at your motivation.Today, I want to talk about the five most insidious thoughts that sabotage our motivation. These are the sneaky little mental scripts that we replay over and over — often without even noticing — and yet they have the power to stop us in our tracks.Welcome to episode #54 of the Midlife Reset podcast. I’m your host Cheryl Gordon, founder of the SHE Mindfulness program. We’re a group of kick ass women who are building the life we were always meant to have. A new cohort is starting soon so if you’re looking to lose weight, feel stronger or sleep better, this could be the opportunity you’ve been seeking.Back to those five insidious thoughts. They are so benign… so common… so unnoticeable… that your motivation is zapped before you begin.And here’s the thing: knowing these thoughts exist is the first step to taking back control. Once we can spot them, we can respond differently. We can step off autopilot. We can choose action over stagnation.So let’s dive in.Thought #1: “It doesn’t matter.”This is one of the most subtle, yet destructive, thoughts. It shows up in many forms:* “It’s not a big deal if I skip today.”* “No one will notice if I don’t follow through.”* “It won’t make a difference anyway.”On the surface, it sounds harmless. But underneath, it’s a form of self-sabotage. It minimizes the value of your actions before you even start. And I worry about … over time… if we just abandon ourselves over and over… what does that say about our priorities? Would you blow off a friend? Your kid? Why do you blow off yourself???This little baby is often tied to perfectionism or overwhelm. If you believe that only perfect, massive action counts, you may unconsciously tell yourself, “Why bother at all?”Example:Imagine you’re trying to meditate every morning. You wake up and think, “Well, if I can’t do a full 20 minutes, it doesn’t matter.” Before you know it, you skip the practice entirely. That tiny voice — “it doesn’t matter” — has already won.How to fight it:* Reframe small actions: Instead of “it doesn’t matter,” think: “Every little bit counts.” Five minutes of meditation is still five minutes more than yesterday. Such an important point here. I always tell myself, just move the stick a little down the yard. I know there is soooo much more work to be done, but a journey of a 1000 miles begins with the first step. What was that Confucious?* Focus on momentum, not perfection: Motivation grows when you act, even imperfectly. The act itself is the reward. We think we need to get motivation before the action but motivation comes from feelings of happiness, confidence, enthusiasm. Just taking that first step generates those thoughts on purpose. Then we are on the road to momentum.* Create visible wins: Write down small successes. Crossing them off reinforces that your actions do matter. I love stickers, the kind you put on kids’ school work. You rock. Great job. Sounds silly but the little girl in me really digs them.Remember: the smallest consistent steps can create the biggest changes over time. All the most successful people - the ones you’re seeing on book shelves or the internet - are there because they DID NOT QUIT.Thought #2: “I don’t know how.”This thought often masquerades as humility or honesty, but it’s really a fear-based saboteur. It shows up like this:* “I don’t know how to start a workout routine.”* “I don’t know how to eat healthier.”* “I don’t know how to start writing that book.”Here’s the trap: if you focus on not knowing, you stop thinking about what you can do. Your mind freezes in a loop of uncertainty, which feels like a very real and urgent reason to do nothing.When I started this podcast, I had no idea. No really. No idea. But I told myself, I’ll figure it out. And here we are. One year later. I’m still figuring it out.If you wait to know everything there is to know about doing something, and you run everyone pitfall through your nervous system and create all the disaster scenarios… no wonder you feel stuck. Start small. Just do something to push the stick.Example:I have a client who wanted to start strength training but kept saying, “I don’t know how to use those machines, I don’t know the right exercises, I don’t know where to start.” The longer she rehearsed that thought, the longer she delayed.Eventually, after learning all this and more through the SHE Mindfulness program, she crafted an action plan. She started at home with 5 pound free weights. Built up slowly based on what she learned in the program. She got some big high fives in our private community. That helped her find the positivity around this and gain momentum.She just needed to know what to do first — and then take one small, clear step. Breaking down weight training into1. 5 squats with 5 pound weights and then building a progressive plan over adequate time with numbers and dates and stuff. That’s how she did it.How to fight it:* Shift focus from knowledge to action: Instead of “I don’t know how,” try: “I know one thing I can do today.”* Break it down: Focus on the very first, smallest step. You don’t have to know the whole journey to start.* Leverage resources: Ask for guidance, use a simple plan, or hire a coach. Knowing a little is enough to get moving.This thought is dangerous because it convinces you to wait for the “perfect conditions” or complete knowledge — conditions that never exist. The antidote is clarity on the next step, not the whole path.Thought #3: “Just this once.”This is the thought that rationalizes sabotage as a one-off indulgence. It’s often tied to habits we want to change — like sugar, scrolling social media, skipping a workout, or procrastinating.It sounds innocent:* “Just this once, I’ll eat the cookie.”* “Just this once, I’ll skip the workout.”* “Just this once, I’ll put it off until tomorrow.”But here’s the insidious part: our brains don’t really do one-offs.A “just this once” becomes two, then three, then a week. Suddenly, the habit you’re trying to create is derailed. Motivation falters, guilt sets in, and the cycle repeats.Example:A client dreamed of writing her book. Originally, the pages flew out her fingers. But, life got busy. Husband needed some tests. One of the kids went through a tough breakup. Kitchen renovation. She started telling herself, “Just this once, I’ll skip writing.” That one “just this once” led to two skipped days. Within a week, she felt like she’d fallen off the wagon completely. What with the stress of all the things, it was too hard to climb back up that mountain alone.In the SHE Mindfulness program, we talk about how life sabotages our dreams. And specifically how to apply the tools so you don’t lose track of your goals.* Use micro-commitments: Instead of aiming for an hour of writing, commit to just 5 minutes. It’s easier to say yes to small actions than to big ones.* Visualize the pattern: Recognize how one exception can turn into a habit. Catch the thought early.* Swap “just this once” for “just for now”: This subtle language shift focuses on the present moment rather than long-term defeat.“Just this once” is motivation’s stealth killer. The antidote? tiny, consistent wins.Thought #4: “I’ll start again Monday.”Ah yes, the classic delay. The brain loves a neat restart date — Monday, the first of the month, after the next vacation, when I retire — but here’s the truth: tomorrow is a myth.This thought allows you to postpone indefinitely. It tells your brain that change is in the future, which reduces the urgency to act today.Example:You tell yourself: “I’ll start tracking my eating on Monday.” Monday comes. You’re tired. Busy. The new Monday shows up. The cycle repeats. Meanwhile, habits aren’t forming, and motivation drops.How to fight it:* Start now, not later: Pick one small, meaningful action that can happen today, even if it’s tiny.* Reframe Monday: Monday is just another day. The first step doesn’t need a calendar date. The extra food that you mindlessly eat before Monday is just more you need to work through. Might as well start now.* Anchor to triggers: Use routines you already have. “After I brush my teeth, I’ll do 10 push-ups” or “After my coffee, I’ll write 2 sentences.”Starting doesn’t require perfection. It requires action. Any action.Thought #5: “I’m too busy.”This is the thought that justifies inaction by citing life’s many demands. And for midlife women, this is especially real. Work, family, caregiving, appointments, social obligations… the list never ends.The subtle sabotage is in framing. We’re not too busy. We’re prioritizing everything except ourselves. Motivation falters because our own needs seem “less urgent.”We had a very accomplished woman come on retreat last year. Burnt out from stress. She thought the answer was to quit her job and move to a different house. But, after going through the SHE Mindfulness program, she began to see that she had exactly the same amount of time as everyone else, she started looking at how she was spending it.She discovered how to:* Reclaim small pockets of time: Even 10 minutes counts. She could invest that in a quick meditation or restorative yoga pose.* Prioritize like a VIP: She would never skip a big work meeting or babysitting for the grandkids. She learned to prioritize her self-care the same way. It went on the family calendar. Her family cheered her on as she stuck to her guns. And they saw the results for the woman they all loved.* Batch and simplify: She started a fresh meal delivery service. She hired house cleaning help. She got a meditation app that reminded her. She tracked workouts at the gym. Efficiency increases consistency.“Too busy” isn’t the problem. Clarity, priority, and small action are.Pulling It All TogetherThese five thoughts — It doesn’t matter, I don’t know how, Just this once, I’ll start Monday, I’m too busy — are deceptively simple. But left unchecked, they sabotage motivation day after day.Here’s the good news: recognizing them is half the battle. Once you can spot the thought, you can choose your response.Step 1: Notice it.Pay attention to your self-talk. Don’t judge yourself for thinking these thoughts. Awareness is the first act of power.Step 2: Reframe it.* “It doesn’t matter” → Every little bit counts.* “I don’t know how” → I know one small thing I can do today.* “Just this once” → I’ll do the tiniest action right now.* “I’ll start Monday” → Monday is just another day; I can start today.* “I’m too busy” → Where can I fit in a small action that matters to me?Step 3: Take micro-action.Motivation grows when you act. Even a tiny step fuels confidence and momentum.Think of it like lighting a candle in a dark room. The flame doesn’t need to illuminate the whole space immediately — but it gives you light to move forward.Closing ThoughtsMotivation is not a mysterious force that some people have and others don’t. It’s the result of mindset, small actions, and attention to our thoughts.If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or frustrated that you “can’t get motivated,” know this: it’s not a personal failure. It’s your brain running habitual scripts — scripts that can be rewritten.By noticing the five insidious thoughts, reframing them, and taking tiny, consistent actions, you reclaim your power. You take control of your day, your habits, and ultimately, your life.And the beauty? Once you start recognizing and countering these thoughts, motivation stops being this elusive, frustrating thing. It becomes something you can create, cultivate, and sustain.If you would like to explore this way of working in the world with a group, consider looking into the SHE Mindfulness Program. We’re starting a new cohort soon so it’s a great time to join. There are online study tools, group coaching and a live private community. Change is so much more fun with friends! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

In this episode, we explore how women can reclaim joy, ease, and alignment in midlife—beyond people-pleasing, sacrifice, and self-abandonment.As midlife women, if you’re anything like us, it’s exhausting and soul sucking to always be “reading the room”. We constantly put others needs and feelings ahead of our own. We sacrifice and suffer. We challenge you in this podcast episode to ask ….. why?Why are you sacrificing and suffering? Why do we get so exhausted that we lose all contact with joy in our lives? Where is the ease?Dawn Drew is a mom of four, long time entrepreneur and author of “Joy and Ease: Are you Ready to Change your Life?”.Here are the six key takeaways from our conversation:1. Allowing StillnessDawn encourages creating space to simply be present with others’ emotions without rushing to fix or rescue them. Just 90 seconds of stillness when someone else is uncomfortable can help you honor your own boundaries while letting others experience and process their feelings naturally.2. Morning Mindfulness: Five Minutes for YourselfStart your day by dedicating just five minutes to yourself—without your phone, email, or distractions. This small practice helps calm your nervous system and sets a foundation for experiencing life with clarity and intention, rather than reacting automatically to the demands of others.3. Regular Check-ins with the “Truth Triad”Dawn recommends checking in with your thoughts, emotions, and actions throughout the day. This self-awareness helps you recognize when you’re saying yes out of obligation or people-pleasing rather than genuine alignment with your values.4. Journaling for AwarenessWriting down triggers, emotions, and thought patterns provides clarity. Journaling helps you understand why you feel resentment, jealousy, or discomfort—and how these emotions signal misalignment with your values.5. Reading Emotions as SignalsEmotions aren’t bad—they’re guidance. Dawn explains how feelings like resentment or jealousy can highlight unmet needs or limiting beliefs, giving you the chance to respond consciously rather than react automatically.6. Compassion—for Yourself and OthersApproach yourself with curiosity, courage, and compassion as you navigate life’s challenges. Compassion isn’t just for others—it’s essential for sustaining joy, setting boundaries, and fostering healthy relationships with yourself and those around you.Throughout the conversation, Dawn emphasizes that joy and ease are practices, not destinations. By committing to yourself, observing your triggers, and honoring your needs, you can show up in the world with more energy, alignment, and presence—benefiting both you and those you care about.Resources from this episode:* Dawn Drew’s book: Join These: Are You Ready to Change Your Life?* Dawn’s Substack: https://joyandeasewithdawndrew.substack.com/s/lets-begin-with-joyConnect with Cheryl Gordon: SHE Mindfulness Program This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Did you look down one day and say … where did all this flesh come from?I did.At 60 years old, I was feeling bloated, exhausted and embarrassed that I couldn’t figure this out in my own body. So I dug into my yoga therapy resources and created a protocol called Mindful Eating.By the end of this article, you’ll have a few solid answers about where that menopause belly came from and some simple fixes you can start right now.So let’s dive in.We’re not alone. So many of my clients come to me frustrated about menopause weight — especially that stubborn “menopause belly” that seems to appear overnight and refuses to budge.And I totally get it. It’s confusing and demoralizing, because what worked in your 30s just doesn’t work the same way anymore.For years, the messaging in my own mind was harsh and judgmental: You’re snacking too much. You should do more cardio. Get your heart rate up.But here’s the first big myth we need to bust — and I want to shout this from the rooftops:Midlife weight gain isn’t just about eating less and moving more.It’s about changing hormones and a shifting metabolism.That’s why going on diets that punish, restrict or cut out whole food groups just don’t work long term. That’s why joining a cross fit class results in more injuries and little weight loss. It’s why it seems everyone else can eat the fun stuff but you are forced to suffer with celery sticks and dry chicken breast.Girlfriend, we need a new way to interacting with food, dieting and even our lives. What we used to do has to change.Here’s why.Guess what! We’re going to talk estrogen. But stick with me. One of my teachers compares estrogen to a mom. You know how the household works because mom makes the lunches, remembers the appointments, cleans the toilets? But then mom gets sick. The house goes to s**t. It’s not the house’s fault. It is because the working dynamic in the house disproportionately relied on mom. Pull her out of the game and the other systems collapse.That’s kinda like estrogen. When we’re in our 30’s, it does all kinds of stuff. Maybe we relied on it too much? Remember burning the candle at both ends, girlfriend? And we got away with it then.But estrogen is declining. In my case, bottoming out. So the working systems all go to s**t. That’s why it seems like overnight, the bottom falls out of sleep, weight, energy, joint pain, brain fog… you name it.As the sex hormones decline, fat storage patterns change, and the body becomes more inclined to hold weight — especially around the midsection. At the same time, insulin sensitivity decreases (check out episode 46 for a more complete description), which means blood sugar spikes and crashes become more common. That fuels cravings and increases fat storage.Add higher cortisol from chronic stress — which tells your body it needs to store fat for “protection” — along with a natural decline in muscle mass, and suddenly your metabolism is operating at a completely different speed than it used to.This isn’t a personal failure. It’s physiology.What doesn’t help is beating yourself. Just like our poor overworked mom, you can’t help getting sick. We are all getting older. It’s not a failure but an invitation to get wiser.But I was beating myself up for not exercising enough or cutting out all carbs.This is the stuff we see on social media and we’re vulnerable to it.Here’s the good news: you’re not stuck. And it’s not impossible to get back on track now.Midlife weight gain isn’t inevitable. Once you understand how your hormones and metabolism are shifting, you can make small, strategic adjustments that work with your body instead of against it. And I know this not just because the research supports it — but because my own body proved it to me.And one of the most important principles here is this: trying to change everything at once is counterproductive. Sustainable change happens sequentially — in manageable steps.That meant setting realistic goals, being kinder to myself, and cultivating patience as my body and I learned how to navigate this new stage of life.ProteinI know that’s all you’re hearing right now but it’s a message that we really need to understand. One of the biggest metabolic game-changers for midlife women is prioritizing protein.As we age, muscle mass naturally declines, which slows metabolism and makes fat storage — especially around the belly — more likely. Protein helps preserve muscle, keeps metabolism active, stabilizes blood sugar, reduces cravings, and supports energy. It also helps you feel fuller for longer, so you’re not constantly battling hunger.A general guideline is about 25 to 30 grams of protein per meal, though this varies by individual. That might look like three eggs at breakfast, salmon or chicken at lunch, or a hearty lentil and vegetable bowl at dinner. An advanced strategy is also to rotate protein sources, because our bodies need a variety of amino acids that we can’t produce on our own.And breakfast is key. All those years of intermittent fasting screwed up my natural hunger signals. And a lot of my clients report just not feeling hungry first thing. But to set up for a hot metabolic day, your system needs that breakfast reassurance. Some of us do well on a protein smoothie and a couple eggs. Fairly light. Fast. But it’s important to focus on.Instead of focusing on eating less, start focusing on eating smarter.But nutrition isn’t the whole picture.2. Build MuscleI was already doing yoga daily, meditating, hiking, biking — and yet joint pain caught me completely off guard. It made me nervous to move. I worried that one wrong Zumba class could throw out my back.As muscle mass declines, we do become more susceptible to injury — and that fear can create a vicious cycle where we move less, lose more strength, and feel “old” far too soon.What many women don’t realize is that estrogen plays a regulating role in nearly all musculoskeletal tissues — bone, muscle, tendons, cartilage, ligaments, fascia, and even fat tissue. The drop in estrogen that begins in perimenopause is often the catalyst for widespread aches and stiffness.In fact, the musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause affects about 70 percent of women, yet in nearly 40 percent of cases, imaging like X-rays or MRIs shows no structural damage. Many women are told it’s psychological — or simply that this is what aging looks like.Meanwhile, the scale goes up, and the pressure to exercise more increases.Again, move smarter, my wise friend.I’ll link to episode 19 in the show notes where I explain why the cardio we all thought would give us toned bodies just doesn’t. And I’ll link to episode 36 that explains what building muscle really looks like. And why you should care. So go back and listen to those for sure.Yes, strength training is something I really want you to adopt but right away you can build your Non Exercise Activity Levels. About 15% of the calories you burn each day is just moving about… walking the dog, hauling laundry up the stairs, waving your hands around when you talk. And this is the kind of movement that you can safely and easily increase even with injuries.I’d also love to hook you up with my free joint freeing series videos. This series of simple flexibility exercises can even be done in bed! And all that basic movement counts as NEAT.But if your joints already hurt, exercising more doesn’t feel supportive — it just adds more stress to an already overloaded system.Which brings us to cortisol.3. Get serious about managing stress.One of the biggest turning points for me was realizing that the stress in my life was actively hoarding weight.Cortisol is your body’s main stress hormone. When it’s elevated — from work stress, poor sleep, skipping meals, or even over-exercising — your body goes into survival mode. That means holding onto fat, especially around the belly, slowing digestion, and conserving energy.Did you know just one night of poor sleep can increase your blood sugar levels the next day, regardless of diet? So it’s VERY influential. And insulin problems reveal themselves in that little Buddha belly.Here’s the kicker: even if you’re eating well, high cortisol can interfere with digestion and nutrient absorption. Food can feel heavy, bloating increases, and energy crashes follow.Ever notice how your belly feels 5 months pregnant by day’s end? That’s stress my friend.Stress itself isn’t the enemy. Even yoga teachers experience stress — it’s what gets us out of bed and helps us organize our lives. The problem is chronic, wearisome stress that feels uncontrollable.The good news is that cortisol can be lowered naturally. Balanced meals, slowing down when you eat, breathing before meals, prioritizing sleep, and allowing genuine rest can make a profound difference.For many driven, capable women, one of the most radical acts of self-care is prioritizing comfort and safety.Decades of making sure everyone else was fed, happy, and okay can leave you quietly starving for nurturing. I had to relearn how to celebrate small wins, prove to my nervous system that I mattered, and move away from coping strategies like wine, sugar, or retail therapy — none of which truly nourished me.Rest is essential for weight loss. So are supportive relationships, boundary setting, asking for what you need, and being fully present. These aren’t luxuries — they’re foundations.So let’s recap:First, prioritize protein — aim to include healthy fats and fibre every time you open your mouth to eat.Second, build muscle instead of burning calories. Excessive cardio can raise cortisol and break down muscle. Strength training and walking are far more effective for hormone balance and metabolism.Third, support your nervous system. Chronic stress tells your body to store fat and disrupts sleep, which creates even more stress. Simple practices — breathing, slowing down, sleeping well — matter more than you think.Midlife weight management isn’t about eating less and moving more.And your body isn’t broken — it’s always working for you.The key is understanding what it needs now and learning to work with it instead of fighting it. When you do that, everything gets easier.Beyond the Joint Freeing videos, I also have a free Mindful Eating guide that incorporates many of these principles. And if you’re ready to do full tackle on all these issues in a systematic way, check out the SHE Mindfulness program. This is online so you go at your own pace. It will help you reset from the ground up … learning tools to eat mindfully, exercise better, rest more soundly, practice more soul satisfying self care… and you aren’t doing it alone. We have a lively community with a private social page as well as weekly group calls. You belong with us so learn more as soon as you finish listening. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

There comes a moment for many women when effort stops delivering results. You’re doing all the right things — working harder, staying capable, caring for everyone — and yet you feel stuck, exhausted, and frustrated.In this conversation, I sat down with Leslie Gordon Christie of BUFF Nation to explore what really changes when women stop pushing and start listening. What unfolded was a deeply honest discussion about subconscious programming, nervous system regulation, embodiment, and the powerful questions that can quietly shift everything.Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it.When Hustle Stops WorkingI asked Leslie to take us back to the moment she realized that pushing harder wasn’t the answer anymore.She shared that this realization came early in her career while working as a television anchor and reporter. On the surface, everything looked successful — but internally she felt stressed, stuck, and disconnected. She didn’t yet understand how much her thinking patterns were shaping her experience.What she noticed was a familiar spiral: the more she focused on frustration and what wasn’t working, the more entrenched those feelings became. Life began to feel like a snowball rolling downhill, gathering momentum in the wrong direction.At the same time, she was navigating a divorce and returning to work after maternity leave. It was a moment of reckoning — the kind that forces you to either stay stuck or choose something different.That was when she hired a coach and discovered something essential:Pushing, hustling, and driving harder only create more of the same. The real shift has to happen internally first.Why External Fixes Aren’t Enough in MidlifeLeslie comes from a strong fitness and nutrition background, but her work today goes far beyond workouts and meal plans.Like many women, she initially believed the external solution would be the fix — exercising more, doing better, trying harder. And while making time for yourself is important, the mistake many women make is assuming that external action alone creates lasting change.What she learned is this:Your habits create your results — and your habits are driven by your subconscious programming.Until we understand and work with that internal operating system, real change remains out of reach.Your Subconscious Is Running the ShowResearch suggests that 96–98% of our behaviors and results are driven by subconscious patterns. In coaching, this is often referred to as our paradigm.Leslie shared a powerful analogy:Imagine trying to take photos on a phone that’s out of storage space. The phone freezes or shuts down — not because it’s broken, but because it needs an upgrade.We’re no different.If we want new results, we need to upgrade our internal operating system so we have the capacity to receive and sustain change.You can always tell what your subconscious program is by looking at your results.The Exhausted High-Capacity WomanThis conversation struck close to home for me. I described a dear friend — incredibly capable, caring, and generous — who looks like she has it all together. Her home is immaculate, she shows up for everyone, and she never says no.And yet:* She doesn’t sleep* She lives with chronic pain* She’s emotionally exhausted* She carries quiet resentment* She keeps going anywaySo many women recognize themselves in this story.Why do we do this to ourselves?Leslie named it clearly: many women carry a deep, unconscious identity as the protector and caregiver. Over time, those roles — combined with outdated beliefs — become exhausting.Which brings us to the five questions.Five Powerful Questions That Change Everything1. Where am I still playing small out of fear, not truth?This question asks you to look honestly at the roles, habits, and stories you’re holding onto that no longer reflect who you’re becoming.Often this shows up as:* Turning down opportunities* Minimizing your visibility* Staying “safe” instead of seenBefore answering, Leslie suggests first asking:Who do I want to become now?2. What parts of me have I been silencing or hiding?Many women learned early on that certain parts of themselves weren’t welcome. Over time, those parts get buried — not healed.There is tremendous freedom in acknowledging them with compassion.At this stage of life, we have the wisdom and experience to meet ourselves honestly — and that can be a profound turning point.3. What do I need more of — not just in my schedule, but in my soul?This is a game-changing question.What brings you joy, peace, and a sense of aliveness?For me, when I asked this at 60, the answer was simple: connection. Not grand gestures — just more intentional moments of closeness, conversation, and presence.Often, what we need more of is already within reach.4. Who do I become when I fully trust myself?If fear and doubt weren’t in charge:* How would you speak?* How would you move?* How would you lead?* How would you live?I love reframing this as:What would I do if I knew I couldn’t fail?So many women edit their dreams before they ever try — because they’ve never seen someone “like them” do it.That’s not truth. That’s conditioning.5. What is one bold step I’m ready to take in the next 30 days?This isn’t about overhauling your life.It’s about one courageous step:* Investing in support* Saying yes to an opportunity* Taking a trip* Beginning a new practiceOne step forward — without overwhelm.Coming Home to the BodyWe also talked about embodiment — learning to feel emotions instead of overriding them.So many women fear their emotions:What if I get overwhelmed? What if I can’t handle it?Leslie’s approach is simple and grounded:* Slow down* Breathe (inhale 4, exhale 6)* Notice where the emotion lives in the body* Name it without judgmentWhen emotions are felt and moved through the body, they lose their power.She also shared tools like Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) and personal mantras such as:I am safe. I am guided. I receive.These practices calm the nervous system and create space for clarity.Why “Just Be Positive” Can Be HarmfulWe touched on toxic positivity — the idea that negative emotions shouldn’t exist.True growth doesn’t come from bypassing feelings. It comes from perspective, not suppression.Every disappointment holds information. Not failure — feedback.As Marianne Williamson says:If the bus doesn’t stop for you, it’s not your bus.That doesn’t invalidate the experience. It simply invites a wider view.Strength as Self-Trust, Not PunishmentWe also reframed strength training — especially for midlife women.Exercise doesn’t need to be punishment.Our bodies want cooperation, collaboration, and partnership.Some days that means strength training.Other days it means walking or resting.Strength becomes an act of self-respect — a way of helping the body work for you, not against you.Is It Ever Too Late?The idea that “it’s too late” is just another inherited program.Leslie shared the famous pot roast story — habits passed down without questioning their original purpose. Many beliefs linger long after they’ve stopped serving us.The real question isn’t Is it too late?It’s:Is believing this serving you — or shrinking you?Growth doesn’t stop at any age. When we stop growing, we feel stuck. When we choose expansion, we feel alive.A Gentle InvitationThis conversation is a reminder that midlife isn’t a closing chapter — it’s a turning point.If you’re feeling the call to slow down, listen inward, and take one brave step forward, trust that impulse.It’s not too late.It never was. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Beep! Beep! Delivery coming in! That’s what insulin sounds like in your body. If you’ve been hearing a lot of buzz lately about insulin resistance and think that your menopause belly might have something to do with that… stay tuned.Today I want to make it super easy to understand what this hormone does for you, why you should care and offer 7 fast, simple ways to balance your blood sugar.I know you’ve heard it all before. Insulin is a hormone manufactured in your pancreas and it is responsible for moving glucose into your cells. Yawn. Do I need to know this for the test, right?Here’s the way I finally started to get the real low down on insulin. With a story!A Love StoryLet’s say you eat a really wonderful meal. All that fuel is digested and your body has a brilliant shipping and receiving system set up. Way better than Amazon even. It gets the nutrients to the places you need them in record time.That wonderful meal contained proteins, fats and carbohydrates. Each one of the macronutrients has its own special pathway. The carbs are quick fuel for your system. As soon as possible, the molecules are converted to glucose (otherwise known as sugar) and your body races to get these energy packed nuggets to where your body requires get up and go.Carbs are all the bread, pasta, rice, muffins, syrup, jam, popcorn, chips, starchy vegetables, legumes, candy, soda…. Your body absolutely needs carbs to provide that quick energy.Ok… so you ate that gorgeous meal and you have glucose ready to go. Can you picture all the little sugar molecules dressed for a hot date and waiting for the Uber? Bazillions of little molecules, lookin’ hot and just floating around.Ahhhh. Here comes their specialized Uber now. Insulin! Wow he’s lookin’ hot! Bazillions of insulin molecules pull up and load the glucose. Woot! Woot! We’re on the road, looking for a hot spot to kick up our heels.Now the best place for a zesty glucose molecule to hang would be muscle tissue. That’s where the real action is. But, sometimes, muscle tissue isn’t really rocking. Maybe it’s sleep time. Or just a really good Netflix documentary for like 4 hours. Not much movement so muscles really don’t feel like hooking up.Poor glucose! I guess a bit like being a wall flower.Anyway…. There are other options for this hang out. Glucose can head to the liver or be stored in fat tissue. These are not first choices but hey, a girls’ gotta do what a girls’ gotta do.Labour TroublesAs the Uber (our insulin hormones) pulls up at the storage facility, either the liver or the fat tissue, ambitious warehouse guys figure out how to pile it all in. But these guys get cranky with a lot of overwork. If that glucose keeps flooding in, day in and day out, they start grumbling… “why doesn’t that muscle do it’s part???”. They start a little work to rule. They stop responding to unload the glucose from the Uber (insulin) and so the Uber keeps driving around and around. Can’t get out of the loop. Stuck in the blood stream.This my friends is insulin resistance. Your warehouse guys are on work to rule…they’re burnt out. Storage gets really sloppy which means a lot more fat in places that you would not choose. Liver gets congested which causes a big commotion with our skin, hair, digestion. Ack!And your doctor warns you that your blood sugars are running high. Which puts you at risk for cardiac disease, diabetes and Alzheimers.And you know the really frustrating part?There’s really an excess of glucose available out there. Lots of hotties lookin’ for love. But due to the inventory management debacle, our warehouse guys practically on strike, the body THINKS we need more energy. It takes a lot of calories to run this gorgeous machine that we call the human body, especially our amazing brains.And the brain has got a big procedural manual. Developed over your whole lifetime, even in times way before your daddy winked at your mommy. In this tome, your brain has experience that if we need quick glucose, send up a flashy billboard to attract the ladies. You experience this sordid attempt at romance as a craving.It FEELS like you have low blood sugar. You feel hungry even. At least peckish. It’s probably not an actual meal time so you just grab what’s easy and appeals to you. Which will almost always be a simple sugar like a donut in the break room, a granola bar from the bottom of your purse, an iced coffee, a bag of doritos. Your very smart brain knows that those sort of cravings get answered quickly and dependably.Unfortunately, the brain does not read the press releases from your warehouse guys and knows little about that labour unrest. It doesn’t know that the warehouses are in a sloppy mess and there is plenty of glucose and love to go around. It will default to the quickest and more habitual solution. Carb craving.This is so interesting to watch. I’ve been using mindfulness tools to really try and feel this happening in real time in my own body. I’ve written a free guide to mindful eating that I’d love to share with you. Remember… this is not the fault of your insulin. The poor Uber drivers are just following the app, right? They aren’t responsible for the extra fuel we’ve ingested. They can’t make the muscles do more. They can’’t solve the labour problems in the warehouses. They just drive the glucose girls around. It’s supply and demand, man.You know who can solve this whole mess? YOU!The Exciting Part of the StoryThe part where you fly in wearing a super hero cape and save yourself from all those horrid chronic diseases. Wow, you’re amazing!Some really simple shifts in your habits can solve all that labour unrest. You can reduce the number of girls out there looking for love. You can get those muscles to do their part. It’s all just common sense really.Here are 7 Simple HabitsThese will reduce insulin sensitivity and your risk of cardiac disease, diabetes, Alzheimers and so many other nasty and annoying conditions we thought we due to aging. But it’s really just an energy mis-match.The first two tips address the muscle movement problem.1. Take a 1000 steps post meal. This equals about 10 minutes strolling casually. This is not a power walk. It’s not about burning calories. In fact, research shows that delaying your walk 30 minutes post meal and going longer is actually less helpful. This works because the large muscle groups you move walking will signal the Uber to drop the glucose ladies with them instead of going to the warehouse. Already your labour troubles are eased.2. Another movement trick… calf raises. There’s something about those calf muscles that really attract the ladies. All it takes is 10 up on the toes and down with the heels done quite quickly. Really pulls in the glucose.Now, how can you reduce the glucose hit without giving up all the carbs that you absolutely do need?3. Eat the protein and veg first during your meal. These macronutrients take longer to break down so glucose will be delayed. Absence makes the heart grow fonder! The warehouse guys will have more time to get organized.4. Consider eating the salad first and use apple cider vinegar dressing. It’s so simple to make… 1/3 vinegar, 2/3 olive oil and salt & pepper to taste. You can get fancy and add a dollop of dijon mustard or a bit of honey but it’s so basic. If you’re not eating salad this meal, you can take 1 T vinegar in 8oz room temp water. That’s great first thing in the morning. The acetic acid in the vinegar boosts the power of your digestion. Breaks the glucose down more thoroughly so the stomach empties well. Sluggish digestion really confuses the Uber drivers.And the timing of your meals is important. In my mindful eating guide, I’ll explain how to plan effectively so the whole when to eat and what to eat becomes effortless.5. Because your warehouse guys are fresher in the morning, shift your eating window earlier in the day. Before they get too tired and cranky. Meals ideally are spread over 10 - 12 hours per day. The remaining hours without glucose going into the system allow the warehouse to get better organized. And it might even stimulate the stores of fat to give up a few glucose goodies when the brain realizes that cravings just won’t get them the love. But your brain will DEFINITELY try the cravings first. It’s science.6. Which brings us to, yes, breakfast may be the most important meal of the day. Skipping that first meal tends to bring on greater blood sugar spikes at lunch. The wild Uber ride gets the girls just too excited and the whole system is destabilized.So many people just don’t feel hungry at breakfast or they lack time to make anything substantial. Remember… you don’t have to rely on cereal or toast. You can eat leftovers. A really good hit of protein and fibre first thing will set up your digestion for a stellar day. I know everyone is pushing the protein…and it’s not the be all end all… but if you’re looking at about 30 grams at breakfast, you’re well set. This would be 3 eggs, whole grain toast with nut butter and a bit of Greek yogurt. Which probably sounds like a lot of food. But in mindful eating, we don’t count calories. We look at eating smart. Timing your protein is smart. I have a smoothie most mornings with pea protein power, almonds, kefir, ground flax seed and greens. I don’t think I hit 30 grams but I’m close. On days that I lift weights, I’ll add a homemade protein bar which clocks in at about 8 grams. These kind of details don’t matter to the glucose girls. They just need the Ubers to show up on time and the muscles to be ready to rock n roll.7. And I bet you guessed that I’d get around to stress. How can I yoga therapist address insulin resistance without that conversation? Cause it’s huge!Simply put, when you are experiencing chronic stress (and who isn’t these days???), your body produces cortisol. That’s the stress hormone everyone talks about. But it’s real. Stress hormones are meant to support your body to fight or flee. Which means those muscles may need to spring into action. So your super smart body, when there’s cortisol rising, signals the warehouse guys in the liver to ship out some glucose girls. Which would be amazing IF the muscles were actually going to fight or flee. But highly likely they’re not. We’re exhausted. We’re stressed. We’re too busy. It’s all just too hard. So the glucose girls are once again floating around in their Ubers looking for love in all the wrong places. Which means… higher blood sugar numbers even if you watched your diet!How depressing is that! You resisted the carbs cravings… which spiked your stress hormones… which upped your blood sugar anyway. Ugh!I really hope you look at my mindful eating program. I have a free guide to get you started but if you really want to get to the bottom of this mis-match, the SHE Mindfulness program takes it deep. We look at the stress in your life. Go further into the hormone mess. Create structure and support to tackle all this. You don’t have to do it alone. Drop me a comment and we can talk more. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Are you feeling embarrassed and old because you leak when you laugh, jump, or cough? Me too. And I got tired of saying no to things like group hikes or going dancing.My guest and I are both “women of a certain age” who have found the answers to embarrassing leaks and demoralizing diapers. We’ve helped hundreds of women find freedom from bladder accidents. Today, we’re going to give you the five basic tools to bring your bladder back from the brink.Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it.By the time you’re done with this podcast, you’ll be able to confidently ask your healthcare team for the support you need to start rehabbing your plumbing.Welcome to Episode 44 of the Midlife Reset Podcast. I’m your host, Cheryl Gordon. I’m a yoga therapist and mindfulness coach, and today, we’re going to bring clarity to why your pelvic floor bottoms out in midlife—and share the astonishingly simple answers that help you get your confidence back.Please welcome my guest, Kim Wenger-Hall, from Flourishing Third Wellness. She’s a fellow yoga teacher, certified health coach, and artist specializing in pelvic floor health, chair yoga, and art therapy. She’s dedicated the last ten years to educating women about their pelvic floor. Rooted in evidence-based practices, she provides tools, insights, and community to navigate aging as a vibrant, expansive chapter—not a countdown of years, but a celebration of what’s possible. Welcome, Kim! I’m really pumped to have this conversation.Kim: I am too! I’m a little nervous—it’s only my second podcast ever.Cheryl: Well, welcome!Kim: Thank you.Cheryl: Now, we promised listeners that we’re going to deliver five things many people don’t know about keeping their plumbing bouncy and responsive. Such an important topic, right?Kim: Yes! It’s really remarkable. I never thought I’d focus so much of my work on pelvic floor health, but honestly, 90% of the traffic on my website, my classes, and my courses is about pelvic floor health—mostly incontinence. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my high school classmates would be seeing post after post about bladder leaks… but this is the conversation we need to be having. Nobody talked about this with us earlier.The biggest takeaway I give people is that pelvic floor issues—bladder leaks, prolapse, diastasis recti, all of it—are pressure management problems. Maybe you’re loading improperly, maybe you’re not strong enough in certain areas, maybe you’re disconnected mind-to-body. It comes down to managing pressure. And when we learn to manage our stressors—both the physical ones and the emotional ones like politics, finances, relationships—it makes all the difference. There is a finite amount of pressure your pelvic floor can withstand.Cheryl: And we’re going to look at this today through a yoga lens, which doesn’t get talked about nearly enough. I’ve had other guests speak about hormones or pelvic floor physiotherapy, but today we’re focusing on yoga—holistic, integrated, whole-body.1. Thoracic Spine MobilityCheryl: First thing—and hardly anyone talks about this—is your thoracic spine. That middle part of your back around the shoulder blades. Why is that so important for what’s going on “down south”?Kim: Great question. Think about the diaphragm up here and the pelvic floor down here. As we inhale, the diaphragm drops and the pelvic floor softens and lengthens. They manage pressure together in three dimensions.Wherever the breath can’t expand, the pressure has to go somewhere. The body will always prioritize breathing—if we stop breathing, we die. So if your upper back is tight, the body compensates: shoulders creep up, ribs flare out, low back strains, or we round forward more just to get a breath in.As we age, we tend to round forward. The vertebrae usually shrink on the front side, which leads to that classic “old lady hunchback.” Many of us even developed this posture as teenagers if we were trying to hide our breasts.Cheryl: And now we spend hours at desks, which restricts our diaphragm and affects pelvic floor movement. So what’s the fix?Kim: Building resilience in the thoracic spine. We need mobility in the shoulder blades and mobility in the thoracic spine. That includes chest strength, subscapular strength, and bringing the head back in space—something we’ll talk about shortly.Cheryl: So something like cat-cow is great for this?Kim: Yes, absolutely. Simple yoga postures make a big difference.2. Core Strength—But Not Sit-UpsCheryl: Okay, the second thing people get confused about: core strength. Why is it so important for pelvic floor function? And what about sit-ups?Kim: No! No sit-ups.Cheryl: Sit-ups are stupid, right?Kim: They only work the rectus abdominus—the six-pack—and they pull us forward. They don’t access the obliques or the transversus abdominuis, the wrap-around muscles that provide diagonal support and stability. And when we aggressively cinch the belly in—navel to spine—the diaphragm can’t move. So the pelvic floor gets confused and overloaded with pressure.Cheryl: And that’s when the pelvic floor gives out.Kim: Exactly. Instead, find core engagement that still allows the diaphragm and ribs to move. Breath first, then core. My favourite cue is “waistline back” instead of “navel to spine.” You can still breathe into that.Everything becomes core work—plank, downward dog, chaturanga, even standing poses—when we allow gentle engagement paired with breath.3. Forward Head Posture (Texting Head)Cheryl: Let’s get into texting head. Forward head posture. Why does this affect the pelvic floor?Kim: Everything is connected. Fascia wraps around the entire body. The spine functions best in its natural curves. When the head drops forward—even just 11 pounds of weight out of alignment—the whole core tank. The body has to compensate to keep us from falling forward. Often that compensation comes from the low back or hip flexors.Cheryl: In yoga, we cue people to align the head with the spine, but I often see people in forward folds letting the head drop and losing their natural curves. So one simple fix is: keep your head aligned as you move.Kim: Exactly. When the head moves out of alignment, pressure management goes out the window.4. Pelvic TiltCheryl: On to pelvic tilt. What’s going on here?Kim: Neutral pelvis is when the front hip points are in line with the pubic bone. Anterior tilt—we’re spilling forward, crunching the low back. Posterior tilt—the femurs jam forward, glutes grip, everything clenches. Either way, the pelvic floor gets confused.Cheryl: The high-heeled posture is classic anterior tilt. Pregnancy often exaggerates posterior tilt. Neither one is mountain pose.Kim: Exactly. Notice your pelvis in yoga poses. Are you dipping forward in a lunge? Tucking under in standing poses? Either habit limits breath and core function. It’s not that you can’t move into those tilts—it’s that you want to do them mindfully.5. Nervous System StateCheryl: And finally, number five—maybe the most important: what does my autonomic nervous system have to do with my bladder?Kim: When we’re disconnected from our bodies and living in a state of constant stress, the brain prioritizes survival—not bladder control. If your brain thinks you’re dealing with threats—emails, money, relationships—your muscles tense, preparing to fight or flee.One major player here is the psoas. It’s a hip flexor and postural stability muscle that shares fascial attachments with the diaphragm and travels all the way down into the thigh bone. Because of this connection, the psoas becomes deeply involved in our fight-or-flight response.Pre-modern humans used the psoas to sprint away from danger. But today, we activate it during everyday stress—when a tense email comes in, when we’re stuck in traffic, even just sitting in the car can mimic the “ready to run” stance. Our nervous system has been practicing stress for thousands of years. It thinks, “Oh, something’s wrong? Great, I know exactly what to do!” And it holds tension—sometimes chronically.That tension limits our body’s ability to manage pressure. Then the body gets stuck in a loop: it knows how to hold pressure, but it forgets how to let go. The muscles get tight, then tired, then confused because they’re no longer moving with the breath.That’s why we always come back to breath. Yoga is so powerful because it’s breath-oriented—we explore a three-dimensional inhale and exhale, feeling the whole body expand and contract. Whenever that expansion can’t happen, the question becomes: What can I shift? What can I change? How can I rebalance pressure management?That includes stress management. Am I holding my breath? Am I pulling my navel to my spine as a coping mechanism?Am I clenching my jaw?Cheryl: Kim, what’s your favourite yoga posture for releasing the psoas?Kim: Probably something restorative, lying on your back.Cheryl: Talk my language, girlfriend!Kim: I thought you’d like that. Imagine lying over a bolster with your hips slightly elevated, and then gently letting one leg lengthen and soften toward the floor. It gives a beautiful sense of length through the psoas. A sandbag on the hip can feel wonderful too. Just make sure your pelvis is neutral or slightly tipped forward if that gives you more space.Cheryl: I’ve got to go do that right now.One thing I often recommend, especially if someone doesn’t have a lot of props or is short on time, is simply putting their legs up on the couch or a chair and breathing. Just letting the pelvic floor move in sync with the diaphragm and letting it do its job.Resources:The Decoder is a clickable PDF that helps women recognize signs of pelvic floor dysfunction beyond the obvious ones like incontinence, prolapse, or diastasis recti. Many people don’t realize things like tailbone pain, sitting bone pain, hip flexor tightness, or upper back stiffness can also be related. Even symptoms like pain with tampon insertion or plantar fasciitis can be connected.Everything is connected.This tool helps women go, “Oh, I never realized these things belong together.” You can take it right to your physical therapist and say, “Here’s what I’ve noticed—can we unravel this together?”Cheryl: It helps you connect the dots, right?Kim: Exactly. And that’s the good news and the bad news: everything is connected. But it all starts with breath and pressure management, just like we’ve been talking about.Cheryl: Kim also has a 7-day pelvic floor challenge, plus amazing resources on her website for improving thoracic spine mobility—something we now know is essential for pelvic floor health.Kim, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom, your experience, and your heart.Kim: I love the work we do, and I’m so glad we connected. I’ve been listening to your previous guests and thinking, “Oh my goodness—everything really is connected!”Cheryl: Share this podcast with your friends, everyone. I’ve met so many brilliant people through these conversations, and there is so much wisdom here. Kim, thank you again for joining me. I hope we can collaborate more in the future.Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Midlife has a way of serving up plot twists we never saw coming. Some are beautiful. Some shake us to our core. But every once in a while, the twist is so sharp and so dark that it stops us in our tracks and makes us wonder: What now?My guest on this week’s Midlife Reset Podcast knows that feeling intimately.Suzy Rosenstein was in her 50s when she faced a sudden job loss after nearly 20 years. No warning. No gentle transition. Just a knock on the door and a life she’d outgrown—but didn’t yet realize she was ready to leave.Today, she has built an incredibly successful career as a life coach helping midlife women not only recover from upheaval, but reinvent themselves with clarity, joy, and purpose. And she does it with equal parts practical wisdom and creativity—including a delightful tool called mindful doodling.Together, Suzy and I explored what it really takes for women to thrive through the messy, unpredictable, and transformative season of midlife. Here are her three most powerful strategies for navigating change with resilience and grace. Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it.1. Let Envy Be Your TeacherOf all the emotions midlife women try to hide, envy tops the list. We don’t want to feel it, admit it, or talk about it. Yet according to Suzy, envy is one of the most revealing emotional clues we have.She explained it like this:Envy isn’t about wanting someone else’s life. It’s about wanting something inside your own life that has gone missing.A client once told Suzy she envied a friend who always had time to visit sick relatives. It had nothing to do with the friend’s circumstances and everything to do with her own desire to live more in alignment with her values.Envy, approached with compassion and curiosity, becomes a roadmap:What does this reveal about what I want more of? What matters to me? What’s missing?Instead of pushing envy away, midlife invites us to use it as a highlighter—illuminating the places inside us that want attention.2. Rekindle Joy Through Your “Passion Clues”One of the most common concerns Suzy hears from women 45+ is this:“I don’t know what I’m passionate about anymore.”Passion feels like a big, intimidating word. Many fear choosing “wrong” and wasting the precious second half of life. But Suzy reframes passion entirely.Her tool, Passion Project 50, walks women through every decade of their life—not to revisit hardship, but to rediscover what once sparked joy.Grade 3 joys. Early 20s joys. Surprising joys. Quiet joys.These moments contain what Suzy calls passion clues—breadcrumbs that lead us back to the activities, environments, and ways of being that naturally light us up.It doesn’t require a career overhaul.It doesn’t require a bold leap.It might be tapping into dance again… or nature… or movement… or creativity… or something totally unexpected.As Suzy puts it:Joy doesn’t have to be big. It just has to be real.3. Fall in Love With the Process (Not the Finish Line)Inspired by Tom Sterner’s book, The Practicing MindMidlife women—and I include myself here—tend to be deeply, sometimes painfully, productivity-driven. We want to check the box, finish the thing, accomplish the goal.Sterner’s work turns that mindset on its head.What if the middle—the practicing, the learning, the messy attempts—is just as meaningful as the outcome?When we stop rushing through the process, everything shifts.Suddenly, practicing a skill becomes enjoyable.Creative exploration becomes calming.Goals feel exciting instead of overwhelming.This idea shapes every part of Suzy’s coaching and also links beautifully to one of her favorite tools…Mindful Doodling and the Zentangle Method: Calm, Clarity, and Creativity in 20 MinutesSuzy is a certified teacher in the Zentangle method—a form of mindful doodling using repeated, simple, structured patterns. No art skills required. No pressure to perform. Just pattern, breath, presence, and flow.It’s astonishingly soothing for the nervous system.As she described it:“If creating is something you enjoy, why rush through it? Why is being done more important than being here?”This practice is at the heart of her new program, Doodle Think Club—a gentle, creative community for women 50+ who want to feel calmer, think more clearly, and reconnect with themselves through mindful art.In a world that idolizes productivity, mindful doodling invites us back into presence.The Deeper Thread: Are You Living Like the Woman You Want to Become?Near the end of our conversation, Suzy offered one of the most important reflections of the entire episode:“Notice how often you think, ‘I’m too busy.’ Ask yourself: Is it actually true? Or am I valuing busy over rest? Over joy? Over alignment? Is there a gap between how I’m living and how I want to live?”This is the heart of the midlife reset.Not just responding to crises.Not just managing change.But intentionally aligning your life with the woman you want to be in your next chapter.Because the truth is this:Aging is a privilege. Not everyone gets it.And midlife is far too precious to live it misaligned, overcommitted, or disconnected from joy.Your Midlife Reset InvitationWhether you’re navigating a big life shake-up or simply sensing that quiet inner nudge—there’s more for me—these three strategies can begin your reset:* Let envy guide you toward what matters.* Follow your passion clues.* Engage fully in the journey, not just the destination.And if creativity calls to you, explore the soothing possibilities of mindful doodling. You can find Suzy’s resources, including freebies and her new program, at DoodleThink.com.Here’s to reinvention, resilience, and the next beautiful chapter.If you would like to explore a reset with me, check out my free Masterclass : 5 Steps to a Midlife Reset.Namaste,Cheryl This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Tis the season of parties. All those rich foods… fancy drinks. It’s no time to start dieting right? Hell no! I’m going to give you three solid strategies for surviving the party jungle this holiday season. I lost 25 pounds of menopausal weight and still enjoyed chocolate and crab cakes. Using the time tested tricks from mindfulness, you’ll be able to navigate the food minefields too without losing track of your goals.Welcome to the Midlife Reset Podcast episode #40. I’m your host, Cheryl Gordon. Even as a yoga therapist, healthy eater and active woman, menopause challenged me like never before. It was a struggle to fit into normal clothes and I really was dismayed at all the extra flesh accumulating.Like so many women my age, it was tempting to cut out all carbs… or push harder at the gym. As a yoga therapist, however, I know the dangers of such radical changes. I knew there was a better way.And I found it by digging a little deeper into the ancient practices of mindfulness and yoga.Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it.Today, I want to share with you three stellar strategies for staying true to your health goals even when holiday parties tempt you.Before we dive in, I just want to make sure you know that all of this information is contained in my free Mindful Eating guide. Let’s talk about one of the biggest barriers I hear from my clients at this time of year… there’s no point in starting a program now because I have this dinner and that party and I’m going away… Sound familiar?But let’s really look at that. You probably eat 3 meals a day. Maybe a couple snacks. So between now and the end of the holiday season, that’s approximately 50 meals. Now let’s look at the big ones, where there will be a high probability that you’re going to eat very rich foods. Christmas dinner, Christmas brunch, Christmas Eve, New Year’s Eve… depending on your traditions, maybe 6 times the meal will be over the top. That’s about 10% of the time.Stick with me through this math now my girlfriend.If you delay thinking about any of this until after New Year’s, 90% of the meals, over which you have 100% control, will be missed opportunities to practice mindful eating. Reduce the calorie load. Eat healthier.So yeah, holiday parties are challenging. But there are soooo many opportunities in between to start your healthier eating plan now.Using the holidays as an excuse to put yourself off is just that… an excuse. It just doesn’t add up.That’s why I REALLY want you to tune into these three tips. You can start right now. And take them with you to your holiday festivities. Why not get an early start on your new year’s goals?#1: Hydrate. We don’t realize how seriously our bodies take the threat of thirst. But your body is very concerned. This is a huge survival threat. So the body will throw anything at you to get your attention.Does this sound familiar? You’re super busy (maybe shopping or wrapping up your desk before the shut down, whatever). And you forget to drink your water. OR you have an event to go to and you don’t want to spend the whole time in the bathroom, so you skip drinking your water.Your brain sends panic signals into the system. The body knows it has, in the past, got some hydration through food. It tried sending you thirst signals but you ignored them. But your body knows you don’t often ignore cravings or hunger. So it throws out urges to snack. Just when the appetizers come out. You are in a very vulnerable place and it’s hard to resist those cravings. It’s not about willpower. It’s about understanding what your body really needs.So how can you use this for party season? Prioritize hydration throughout the day leading up to the party. Make sure you drink water at the party. A good rule, and one that still allows for some celebrating, is to alternate one water with one alcoholic beverage.#2: Plan ahead. As we mentioned, the big holiday blow outs are a small fraction of your whole nutrition plan. Look at the whole day or week and consider how to insure you are getting good nutrition consistently.So often, we just give up. The whole month is a bust so I might as well eat indiscriminately. I’ll figure it out in January. Right?Don’t do that to yourself! At our age, it is sooo hard to shave off a couple pounds. It is a much better strategy to pull up the drawbridge before the moat has been breached, if you know what I mean.How does this look in real time? Look at what is likely to be at the event. What are you kryptonite foods? In the morning, when your brain is fresh, decide what is acceptable to enjoy at the event. Your morning brain is holding your health goals high in mind. It’s not a little tipsy from sparkling wine. It isn’t exhausted from a long day at the office. It isn’t stressed because you couldn’t find anything to wear. With a cool, clear and compassionate head, set your parameters.And stick to them. This is sooo important. When you make a promise to yourself, you keep it. Would you blow off your kid or grandchild if you made a promise? No!And don’t be a hero. If it’s a fun event and you want to be part of it then be realistic in your planning. This is a small fraction of your overall eating habits. When you demonize foods, those become your kryptonite. So plan ahead and stick to it.#3 Don’t bank your calories.Say you have an open house tonight and you know there will be cheese, egg rolls, brownies, all the things. Make sure you eat adequate nutrition throughout the day. Don’t starve yourself, thinking you can “bank” the calories for later.Your stomach is only so big… about the size of your fist. Once you have ingested that volume of food, you are full. The processing plant is at capacity. Even if there were supply chain issues earlier in the day, the plant is only that size. Extra supplies have to stay outside on the skids. There’s no room at the inn.If you do deny yourself throughout the day, your body will, again, go into panic mode. Starvation was a real and very present threat for most of human existence. No wonder when you do finally get to food and you’re tired, stressed, distracted and starving, it leads to binging and being indiscriminate.And even if I had iron willpower at the party (you know - because others are watching), I used to hit the drive through on the way home. I justified it by saying that there was nothing at the party “that I could eat”. Or I got home and binged on popcorn. Once the floodgates opened, it was a free for all.The result is way more calories than we really need and not from the nutrient dense foods that we know our bodies really want.Ok. Let’s go over your holiday plan for Mindful Eating. Remember, you can get a more complete program by clicking here.Drink water. Plan ahead. And don’t starve yourself.It all sounds so simple doesn’t it? So why didn’t I just do that?No one really laid that out for me before. Once I put protocols like this in place, with a healthy dose of self compassion, mindful rest and regular movement, the weight stabilized. And it will work for you too.Don’t give up on yourself this holiday. Start resetting now and your January self will be so proud.Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

How many times do you get up in the night to pee? And is it easy to get back to sleep after?Fariya and I have helped hundreds of women improve their breathing, which has resulted in better sleep, calmer bladders, and greater focus. Today, we’re going to explain the connection, provide accessible strategies, and get you on the road to greater energy for what you love. So let’s go!Welcome to episode number 38 of the Midlife Reset Podcast. I’m your host, a yoga therapist, mindfulness coach, and your trusted friend when you need advice about aging strong holistically.Please welcome my guest, Fariya Doctor. I have been a client of Fariya’s—she’s amazing and super smart. She is a registered massage therapist and a long-time practitioner of Feldenkrais Movement Therapy. Together, we’ve prepared a unique program to address a problem that plagues so many midlife women: getting up to pee three, four, five times a night. It is so exhausting.I’d like to turn the presentation now over to Fariya as she shares some science and practical tools around breathing, bladder issues, and better sleep.Fariya: Thank you very much. One of the reasons I love this topic is because it’s so powerful and so changeable. People don’t realize how quickly they can change their sleep outcomes.As a Feldenkrais practitioner, I focus on function—how to optimize function is a big passion of mine. Being a Buteyko breathing instructor has helped me understand the science behind improving breathing so you can sleep better. One aspect is your breathing pattern.One thing people often don’t realize is that they may have an underlying breathing problem. They’re destabilized in their breathing during the day, which makes it harder to slow down at night and stay asleep.A breathing pattern disorder means you’re breathing more than you need. The definition includes patterns of over-breathing where the depth and rate of breath exceed your body’s needs. It’s not necessarily a panic attack—it might simply be breathing more than 20 breaths per minute, often through the mouth.Mouth-breathing during the day creates short, quick breaths that alter your internal chemistry—the balance between carbon dioxide and oxygen. Interestingly, the brain monitors carbon dioxide levels, not oxygen, because oxygen saturation is usually fine unless there is a lung disorder. When carbon dioxide levels get too low, we can feel anxious, get headaches, experience chest tightness, cold extremities, tight muscles, aggravated allergies, altered hormone cycles, and pins and needles.The cool thing is that this can be reversed quickly by slowing your breathing, reducing volume, and reducing effort.How does this affect our bladder? A key hormone involved is vasopressin. Vasopressin rises in the evening and during sleep. Its job is to manage fluids in the body, because even though we’re resting, we lose fluid through respiration—more so if mouth-breathing, which dries us out.Vasopressin keeps fluids cycling through the kidneys and prevents the bladder from filling at night. But if vasopressin levels drop due to destabilized breathing, the bladder fills during the night, waking us up.(See diagram in video) This shows the bladder sitting low in the pelvis, beneath the uterus and sigmoid colon. When the bladder fills, it puts pressure in the pelvis, triggering nighttime wake-ups.Most people know the basic sleep hygiene advice—stop drinking fluids in the evening. But if breathing is off, vasopressin stays low and nighttime wake-ups continue.There are many useful tools to improve this—breathing through the nose at night, mouth tape, mouth guards, and learning to maximize nasal airways.Some helpful books include The Oxygen Advantage by Patrick McKeown and Breath by James Nestor, both powerful introductions to the science of breathing. I also teach courses and have many free YouTube videos, including “Improve Nasal Breathing, Improve Your Life,” covering how to establish proper nasal breathing for overall health.Cheryl: And with the hormone changes that many people completely miss, in perimenopause and menopause, progesterone and estrogen levels drop. But vasopressin also changes, and breathing intimately impacts all hormone balance.Let’s now talk about getting back to sleep, because that part is so important. Here’s why sleep is getting worse: hormonal changes shift the body’s relaxation chemistry. Hormones tell you when to pee, when you’re allowed to sleep, when you’re hungry, and even when you can get angry. This is why sleep, mood, and energy feel unpredictable in midlife.Many of us wish for a solid eight hours of sleep, but this isn’t necessary—or even realistic. Sleep has stages: the early relaxed stage, light sleep, slow-wave deep sleep for healing and recovery, and REM sleep when dreams happen and the brain is highly active. These cycles repeat through the night.As hormones shift in midlife, sleep cycles become shorter, meaning you experience more cycles per night and therefore more opportunities to wake up at the end of REM. This isn’t bad—it’s normal. Understanding this reduces panic during nighttime wake-ups.This is where non-sleep deep rest (NSDR) becomes a superpower. When we wake, we often panic—worrying about the next day, feeling broken, or angry at ourselves. But NSDR intentionally places the brain into a restorative state without actually sleeping. It restores energy, calms hormones, and primes learning. One hour of NSDR may equal four hours of a regular sleep cycle.So here are the actual strategies:1. At a 3 a.m. wake-up, stay calm.Don’t fight wakefulness. Breathe. Remind yourself another sleep cycle is coming. Apps like Insight Timer offer many free sleep meditations. Avoid getting upset—that hormonal spike makes it harder to return to sleep.2. Eye relaxation technique.Lie comfortably with your elbows supported. Cup your palms gently over your closed eyes without pressing. Feel the warmth soothing the muscles. Then slowly move your eyes left to right a few times. Then up and down. Then diagonally in both directions. Finally, slow circles in both directions, keeping your head still and moving only your eyes. This slows the nervous system and helps shift you into relaxation.* Backwards Breathing. The next technique you can try in the middle of the night is what I call backwards breath. It’s a version of counting sheep, I guess—like “99 bottles of beer on the wall”—but with a specific purpose.A lot of studies show that counting from 31 down to 0 is adequate to get people back to sleep. For me, because I’m a real Type A, high-need person, I start at 100 and go backwards.The technique is simple:You breathe in and breathe out at your normal rate, your normal way, in and out through the nose, as Freya taught us. And you count: 100 in, 100 out. 99 in, 99 out. 98 in, 98 out, and so on, all the way down to zero.Most of the time, if you don’t fall asleep, you’ll get distracted. Your good friend, the brain, will try to get you all revved up about something. The rule is: if you get distracted, you go back and start at 100 again.And some nights, you might go back to 100 a hundred times. But the reason this works is that counting backwards requires a different part of your brain. It pulls you out of the worry-anxiety part that’s keeping you awake and into a more logical part—the part that “reads the room” and knows this is sleep time. It’s like talking sense to yourself.* Restorative Yoga in Bed. I’m not sure if you’ve ever had the bliss of a full restorative yoga class, but I highly recommend it.You can adapt many of the postures and do them right in bed. I sleep with three pillows—that’s another podcast—but I take those pillows and give myself supported child’s pose, supported rotated child’s pose, legs up the pillows (so, an elevated legs position). I do reclining twists propped up with pillows, butterfly legs propped up with pillows.All of these poses may or may not be familiar to you, but I have resources on YouTube. Just message me and I’m happy to show you photos or send you videos, because restorative yoga is such a wonderful practice for everyone. I do this right in bed, underneath my covers, so I stay warm.And a lot of times, I actually fall back asleep in one of those restorative poses. And yes, I have a partner right beside me—he’s still snoring. I really need him to listen to Freya’s talk about not mouth-breathing, because he’s got all the things she said would happen if you mouth-breathe. I’ll make sure he sees the replay.You can get the audio and video guidance for the strategies I just talked about, as well as further tips for how to set yourself up with a better morning routine, in my Sleep Solutions course. When your nervous system feels safe, my friends, your body can heal. And when your body heals, your brain can learn. And when your brain learns, midlife becomes a season of possibility—not decline.Fariya, thank you so much for joining me today. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

My guest today was a lifelong athlete — boot camps, spin, Body Pump, you name it. But one day, she looked down and thought, “Where did all this belly fat come from?”That moment set her on a journey that might rewrite everything you thought you knew about midlife fitness.Lynn Sederlöf-Airisto joins me from Finland to unpack the truth about what really works for women in their 40s, 50s, and beyond — and why so many of us waste hours at the gym doing the wrong kind of exercise.We talk about what true strength training actually is (hint: it’s not Body Pump), how to choose the right weights, and why this kind of training might just be the secret to rekindling your metabolism, reshaping your body, and reclaiming your confidence.💪 In This Episode, We Discuss:* Why women start losing muscle as early as age 30 — and how menopause accelerates it* The big difference between “working out with weights” and strength training* The science-backed formula for building strength (and saving time at the gym)* How to find your ideal weight for training — without guesswork* Why one set can be more effective than three (and how to get the most out of every workout)* The truth about “bulking up” and why it’s nearly impossible for most women* Simple mindset shifts that make lifting feel empowering, not intimidating* How strength training supports bone density, metabolism, and insulin sensitivity🌸 Key Quotes“I thought if I had dumbbells in my hand and my muscles were burning, that meant I was strength training — but it turns out that’s not true.” — Lynn Sederlöf-Airisto“Being strong is so cool. My clients start out wanting to lose weight, but end up falling in love with feeling powerful.” — Lynn Sederlöf-Airisto“We lose muscle and bone as we age — but with the right training, we can absolutely get it back.” — Cheryl Gordon🔗 Connect with LynnWebsite: Be Fit After 40 Instagram: @befitafter40 💫 Connect with CherylWebsite: cherylgordonyt.comInstagram: Cheryl Gordon This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Have you ever secretly dreamed of writing a book one day? Or maybe you just crave a good story that makes you feel seen in midlife — with all its challenges, changes, and surprising chances for reinvention. Today’s guest proves that it’s never too late to start something bold.Gretchen Anthony published her first novel at age 48, and her latest, Tired Ladies Take a Stand, is striking a chord with women everywhere who are tired of being everything to everyone — and are ready to claim their own space.So if you’ve ever wondered how to balance your dreams with life’s demands, or how to spark creativity when you feel stuck, this episode will inspire you to think differently about what’s possible in midlife.Welcome to episode number 34 of the Midlife Reset Podcast. I’m Cheryl Gordon — a yoga and mindfulness coach for midlife women who want to feel stronger, lighter, and more energized. Welcome, Gretchen! I’m so thrilled you could join us. Give us a little background — what did you do before age 48?Gretchen Anthony: Thank you for having me! Well, I did a little bit of everything, like so many of us do. I was busy raising three boys and had a career in corporate communications for about twenty years. I juggled full-time work and contracts, we moved a few times for my husband’s career, and I was constantly trying to find balance — fulfilling daily responsibilities while still trying to do what filled my heart, with whatever energy I had left.Cheryl Gordon: When the kids were growing up, I imagine there wasn’t a lot left over. And now your last one’s just gone off to college?Gretchen Anthony: Yes, just off to college! We spent the weekend getting him settled — it lifts your heart, but it’s bittersweet.Cheryl Gordon: It is hard, isn’t it? When my boys moved out, I was embarrassed to admit I had empty nest syndrome. I thought that was for people who didn’t have much else going on — but you’re always a mom, and there’s always an adjustment.Gretchen Anthony: Exactly. I used to hear women say, “I don’t know what to do with myself now,” or “I don’t know who I am now,” and I thought, that’s sad. But when it happens, you get it. In those years before writing my novel, I was trying to figure out what’s next for me — because if I did my job right, my kids would eventually fly.Cheryl Gordon: We are happy they’re flying, but it’s still a loss when that chapter closes.Gretchen Anthony: Yes — that sorrow comes from knowing a huge part of your life is complete.Cheryl Gordon: I’ve actually been an empty nester longer than I had my kids at home! They both left at 18 and never came back. I’m so proud of them, but I still miss those noisy, busy days. Anyway, did you always know you were going to write a book one day, or did that come out of the blue?Gretchen Anthony: I always had this sense that I had a book in me. But early in my career, I wanted security — something more stable than fiction writing could offer. So I went into management consulting and corporate communications. That fulfilled a need for a while. But deep down, I still had stories and characters brewing. The older I got, the louder they became, demanding to be heard. That’s what finally pushed me to write.The matriarch in my debut novel, Evergreen Tidings from the Baumgartners, lived in my head for five to seven years before I wrote the book. I finally thought, “She’s never getting out unless I write her down!”Cheryl Gordon: So writing became your next chapter — no pun intended!Gretchen Anthony: Exactly! I’d just been laid off from my corporate job and was seeing a career coach. He looked at my résumé and said, “It reads like chapters — you had a chapter where you did this, another where you did that.” And I said, “Funny you should say that, because I feel like I won’t be settled until I publish a book.” He said, “Then maybe now’s your time.” And that was at age 48.Cheryl Gordon: So many people face a big career shift around that age — it’s inspiring to hear your story. You mentioned that your characters live inside you until they demand a voice. Is that the secret to your creativity?Gretchen Anthony: For me, yes. The best characters are the ones who live with me for a while. When I try to force them, they’re less authentic. Writing is really about listening — to conversations, the way people talk, the little quirks of human nature. Those things inform my characters and make them feel real.Cheryl Gordon: Your latest book — which I have right here — is Tired Ladies Take a Stand. It’s a bit autobiographical, isn’t it?Gretchen Anthony: It is! The tagline is something like, “You’ve heard of the year of saying yes — this is the year of saying no.” It’s about four friends at two stages of life. In their twenties, they’re starting careers in San Francisco and decide to say yes to everything — adventure, opportunity, fun. Then you fast-forward to their late forties and early fifties, and they realize how toxic always saying yes can be. They have to learn to say no — and when people aren’t used to hearing that from you, chaos follows!The story is loosely based on me and my friends in our twenties. We really did have a “say yes” year, which we jokingly called “Kiss Fest.” We didn’t take it that far, but it was a time of adventure and self-discovery.Cheryl Gordon: I love that you bring that sense of adventure into a story about midlife women. There aren’t many novels featuring women our age as heroines — and you make it every bit as fun and compelling as the stories about twenty-somethings.Gretchen Anthony: Thank you! Writing this book forced me to step outside myself and really look at this stage of life differently. Even though the story draws from real friendships, I had to create fully developed characters — not just carbon copies of my friends. That process made me reflect on how we’ve all changed, what still serves us, and what doesn’t.I also realized how few books feature midlife heroines. This phase of life is huge — full of opportunities, freedoms, and challenges. It’s every bit as complex and vibrant as our twenties, just with a different perspective.Cheryl Gordon: Exactly. And when you base characters on real friendships, you still never really know what someone’s thinking or feeling on the inside. That’s where creativity and empathy come in.Gretchen Anthony: Right. I had to remind my real friends, “Yes, you’ll recognize yourself in the book, but these characters do dumb things! It doesn’t mean I see that in you.”Cheryl Gordon: I won’t give too much away, but Fern — one of your main characters — faces a big decision. She’s offered an incredible career opportunity, but it makes her friends uncomfortable. It’s a great example of how hard it can be for midlife women to say no, or to prioritize themselves for a change. What do you think Fern teaches us about that?Gretchen Anthony: Fern learns that she hasn’t been truthful — first with herself, and then with the people she loves. She has to admit what she really wants and needs. In the story, she wrote a book based on her friends’ lives, and years later it’s optioned for a film — but she never got their permission. She goes ahead anyway, thinking they’ll understand eventually.The lesson is that when we’ve put ourselves second for so long, we can overcorrect — making choices that don’t align with our values. It’s like being on a diet: you deprive yourself for months, and then when you finally allow something, you go overboard.As midlife women, we’re learning to find balance — to honor our needs without betraying ourselves or others. Saying no can be uncomfortable, but it’s often the most honest thing we can do.Cheryl Gordon: That’s such a great point. When we constantly suppress our own needs to make everyone else happy, resentment builds up. I see that in mindful eating too — deprivation never works.Cheryl Gordon: Before we wrap up, I really want to make sure we talk about what’s next for you. In January, you started The Middle Book Club — tell us about that!Gretchen Anthony: I did! Thank you. This idea grew out of something I realized while writing and marketing Tired Ladies Take a Stand. If you look at contemporary fiction, you might think women disappear around age 40. We read so many stories about women coming of age or falling in love — then suddenly they vanish until they reappear as quirky seventy-somethings. I call it the Miss Marple effect.Cheryl Gordon: That’s hilarious — and so true!Gretchen Anthony: Right? I knew my book wasn’t the only one out there, and I kept hearing from readers who said how refreshing it was to see characters their own age — women balancing aging parents and adult kids, living in that “sandwich generation.”So I started The Middle Book Club, an online community on Substack — you can find it at themiddlebookclub.com. Each month, we read a novel featuring heroines in what I call “the juicy middle” of life — because this stage really is juicy. It’s rich, complicated, and full of growth.For October, for example, we’re reading The Change by Kirsten Miller — about three women in their 40s and 50s who discover supernatural powers and take justice into their own hands. Every month, we explore stories that reflect what we’re living, and we get to talk about them together as peers.Cheryl Gordon: That sounds amazing — and that’s the real joy of a book club! Not just the wine and gossip kind (though no judgment there!) but one where you actually talk about the books with like-minded women.And speaking of adventure — I know you’re also cooking up something new that combines books and travel.Gretchen Anthony: Yes! My next chapter — and I love that we can have multiple chapters at once — is Bookish Travel, a new newsletter and travel project that builds on The Middle Book Club. My husband and I are empty nesters now, so I have more flexibility to work on the road.The idea is to help readers turn every trip into a literary adventure. Say you’re visiting Dublin — what literary spots should you see? I just returned from our 25th anniversary trip to Ireland, so I’m full of ideas. Literary tourism is huge right now — people want to visit the places that inspired their favorite books. So this is my way to blend storytelling, travel, and community into my next venture.Cheryl Gordon: That sounds incredible. Everyone listening — go sign up for The Middle Book Club so you’ll hear when Bookish Travel launches!Gretchen Anthony: Yes, please do!Cheryl Gordon: So many midlife women have travel dreams, but we often hold back — maybe because of physical limitations, or because someone else always seems to need us. But Gretchen and I both believe: it’s time for tired ladies to take a stand.Get out there, explore those amazing book destinations Gretchen has scouted, and keep feeding that lifelong learner inside you.And if what’s holding you back are sleepless nights, sore joints, or that sluggish midlife weight gain — I’d love for you to check out my free masterclass, The 5-Step Midlife Reset. It’s available now on my website.You’ll discover simple practices to move from teary, tubby, and tired — to strong, happy, and energized. You’ll feel like the heroine of your own story… and maybe one day, Gretchen will write a novel about us!Gretchen Anthony: Thank you so much, Cheryl.Cheryl Gordon: Thank you, Gretchen, for sharing your time and wisdom today. I’m still a little starstruck getting to interview a real author! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com

Welcome back to the Midlife Reset Podcast, episode 33! I’m your host, Cheryl Gordon. Today, we’re diving into something every midlife woman has experienced—mood swings, irritability, that sudden sense of “I can’t believe I just snapped over nothing!”Now, I want you to know—this isn’t just in your head. It’s real, physiological, and completely normal. Hormones, stress, sleep, and even nutrition all play a role in how we feel in midlife.By the end of this episode, you’ll understand why your moods shift, what’s happening in your brain and body, and most importantly, practical ways to regain control, feel calmer, and protect your mental wellbeing.Let’s start with hormones—our invisible puppeteers. Around our 40s and 50s, estrogen and progesterone start to fluctuate even more wildly than normal as the ovaries slow down. Estrogen is more than just a reproductive hormone—it affects your serotonin, the “feel good” neurotransmitter. Lower estrogen can mean lower serotonin, which can trigger anxiety, irritability, sadness, or that general “ugh” feeling. If you’re feeling scattered, more anxious than you used to or just plain cranky, it’s probably because the uptake of serotonin is lower. We’re definitely more vulnerable to stress in general without that cushion.Progesterone, on the other hand, is like the chill hormone. It helps regulate mood, calm the nervous system, and even supports sleep. So when progesterone drops, you can feel more anxious, tense, or snappy than usual. When my progesterone levels tanked in perimenopause, sleep became almost impossible overnight. We need progesterone to signal the production of melatonin, which helps us feel sleepy. The relaxation nerves don’t get the signalling they need to cue the relaxation response if progesterone is low.And don’t forget cortisol, the stress hormone. Last week, we discussed this glucocorticoid compound in more detail so you may want to refer back to episode 32. We talked all about stress and hormones and weight gain. Good stuff.Cortisol rises when we’re tired, overwhelmed, or stressed, and it works hand-in-hand with our sex hormones to influence mood. High cortisol + fluctuating estrogen and progesterone? That’s the recipe for emotional turbulence. Isn’t that how we feel, girlfriend, in midlife? Like we’re on a crazy roller coaster and some sadist somewhere has the stick shift.To add insult to injury, all the running around we did to keep everyone else happy and safe created a lot of stress. This constantly stimulated the adrenals to pump out that cortisol. Rushing to get the kids on time… creating perfect holiday memories for a family of 18… worrying all day at work about your sick neighbour… all that just wore those little glands right out. Soooo, when we get to midlife, the adrenals, which should take up a little of the estrogen/progesterone production, are just offline.Those mood swings you’re feeling? They’re not a character flaw. They’re a signal that your body is adjusting to new hormonal realities.Now here’s the big take away!!! Hormones do their own thing without you directing them. That’s when we feel like we’re on the crazy train ride. BUT.. wait for it…. As a human with a super brain, you have the ability to wrest control back from the automatic pilot.All the magazine articles and wellness experts advice to eat carefully, exercise more and meditate. But they don’t explain exactly how, why and really, what to do when old habits die really slow. How many times have you had those very goals every New Year’s?Let’s dive in to what you can start now, small steps and simply, to move toward better mood and sharper focus.Shaping hormonal responses in every day life means paying attention to your every day habits. Yup… it’s that lifestyle stuff again—sleep, movement, and nutrition— they can either amplify those mood swings or help you ride them more smoothly.* Sleep: Poor sleep disrupts your hormones even further, lowers serotonin, and makes cortisol spikes worse. Feeling cranky after a night of tossing and turning? That’s your brain on low serotonin and high cortisol. Changing habits is super hard when you are running on empty. Stay tuned and we’ll talk strategies around this.* Movement: Gentle exercise like yoga, walking, or strength training boosts endorphins, which balance mood. Even a 15 minute practice can start the process. The big key is consistency.* Nutrition: Foods rich in protein, healthy fats, and fibre stabilize blood sugar, which prevents mood swings fuelled by glucose spikes and crashes. Midlife women are particularly sensitive to blood sugar fluctuations and issues with insulin. This means prioritizing planning your food, not running on empty or cutting out essential nutrients in the interest of cutting calories.* Mindfulness & Stress Reduction: Breathing exercises, meditation, journaling—even 5 minutes a day—lower cortisol, which directly improves emotional resilience. Mindfulness won’t inspire your husband to change being sloppy. It won’t make your boss automatically kinder. It won’t get your kids to call. BUT it can shift how your body responds to these stressors, which shifts the hormones.It’s all connected—sleep better, eat smarter, move mindfully, and your mood swings start to soften.Now we look at making this happen in your life, as it is now. I don’t want to make any grandiose plans or resolutions that will be ditched in week two. We’ve all done that.Here are five quick tools that build a healthier lifestyle. My suggestion is that you pick one and work on that until it’s habitual. That might take 3 days or 3 weeks. We’re all coming at this from different angles.I mentioned earlier that habits are hard to change when we’re super tired. The brain simply does not have the resources to process change when you’re stressed. So our first strategy should be to choose a tool that is most helpful for you to cope with stressors in your life.Which one of these do you think will make the biggest impact and will be the easiest to adopt?Tool 1: Mindful Check-InSpend 2–3 minutes noticing your mood without judgment. Name it. “I feel frustrated.” “I feel anxious.” Labeling emotions actually calms the brain’s amygdala and gives you space to respond, not react. (Practice 3 minute breathing space)Tool 2: Breathwork for Immediate CalmTry this breathing method: Inhale until you fill your lungs, then inhale a little more. Exhale and sigh out the mouth. Repeat 3 x. This “double inhale” massages the heart a little extra which tells your nervous system it’s safe to relax.Tool 3: Movement as Mood ResetEven a short walk outside or a gentle yoga stretch can shift cortisol, boost serotonin, and reset your mood. Bonus: sunlight exposure early in the day helps regulate melatonin for better sleep. We mentioned earlier that even 15 minutes/day is an effective dose. Try these quick stretches with me right now. (Side bend, twist, cat/cow)Tool 4: Blood Sugar AwarenessEat protein at every meal and limit refined carbs. Keeping your blood sugar stable stabilizes your mood. Midlife women often overlook this, but it makes a huge difference. Research is suggesting that an active midlife woman might need 90 grams or more protein per day. Aim to find whole food sources rather than protein drinks and supplements. Lovingly feeding your body makes your nervous system very happy. Mindful Eating is a great practice and I have a free guide to get you started. There will be a link in the show notes.Tool 5: Self-CompassionIf people heard the vicious commentary running in my head some days, they would be shocked! I can be really mean to myself. During my weight loss and using the SHE Mindfulness program, I learned to recognize and reframe a lot of that self critical thinking. You know what I found really helped? Placing my hands over my heart, like this, closing my eyes briefly and saying something comforting to myself. Like you would to a small child or pet who was upset. Let’s try it cuz I know it sounds too basic.Here’s an important mindset shift: mood swings aren’t a weakness—they’re your body talking to you. They’re asking for rest, movement, nutrition, or emotional care. If we listen instead of resist, we can reduce their frequency and intensity.Pema Chodron says that what we resist will keep coming back to visit us until we let it in. Some of teachers say “what we resist, persists”.Think of it like tuning an instrument. Hormones, stress, and lifestyle factors are the strings. When one is off, everything sounds discordant. With attention, mindfulness, and practical strategies, you can bring yourself back in tune.So today we talked about why midlife mood swings happen, the role of hormones and cortisol, and simple tools to help you feel steadier and happier.If you’re ready to take the next step, I have a free Mindful Eating Guide that pairs beautifully with these strategies, helping you nourish your body without stress or guilt. It’s all about small, kind, consistent steps—perfect for midlife women. There is also the Sleep Solutions Course ($19) that expands some of these self care tools, especially ones you can use in the middle of the night.And if this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need a little extra support, and subscribe so you never miss an episode of the Midlife Reset Podcast.Remember: your moods don’t define you, but the way you respond to them can empower you to thrive through midlife and beyond. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherylgordonyt.substack.com