Leaving the American Dream: Raising a Trans Daughter and Starting Over in Spain

About this episode

Jaimie Kelton interviews TJ Shimeld about his journey of coming out, co-parenting, and relocating to Spain for a safer life with his transgender daughter.

What happens when the life you built no longer fits who you are — or the world no longer feels safe for your family? In this episode, Jaimie sits down with TJ Shimeld to talk about coming out after marriage, building an unconventional but beautiful co-parenting relationship with his ex-wife, raising a transgender daughter, and ultimately making the life-changing decision to leave the U.S. for Spain. It’s a conversation about identity, reinvention, grief, freedom, LGBTQ family experiences, and what it means to finally build a life that feels aligned. TJ shares how the 2016 election marked the beginning of a deep unraveling of the “American dream” he thought he was supposed to want — and how that unraveling eventually led him, his husband, and his daughter Opal to a more peaceful, affirming life abroad. 🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways Sometimes the life that looks “right” from the outside isn’t the life that fits. Coming out later in life can be painful, liberating, and deeply clarifying. Divorce does not have to mean destruction; it can lead to a different kind of family. Queer and trans safety isn’t theoretical — it shapes daily life, choices, and futures. The feeling of betrayal many…

People in this episode

Host: Jaimie Kelton

Guest: TJ Shimeld

Topics covered

• transgender parenting
• LGBTQ family experiences
• reinvention
• co-parenting
• identity
• safety
• American dream

Keywords

• trans daughter
• co-parenting
• LGBTQ
• American dream
• reinvention
• safety
• 2016 election
• divorce
• identity

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: American dream

Places: Spain, U.S.

More episodes of The Queer Family Podcast – LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories

• From Unexpected Pregnancy to Known Donor RIVF: A Queer Family Building & IVF Journey · May 4, 2026 · 33 min
• Two Dads, Three Years of Adoption, and a Surrogacy Miracle · April 27, 2026 · 57 min
• Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families: The “Do We Want Kids?” Conversation · April 20, 2026 · 49 min
• Queer Family Life, IVF & LGBTQ+ Parenting—And Why It All Feels So Hard Right Now · April 13, 2026 · 53 min
• A Very Real Family Update · April 6, 2026 · 13 min
• Foster to Adopt as a Gay Dad: Jameel Mayers’ Path to Parenthood · March 30, 2026 · 60 min