Two Dads, Three Years of Adoption, and a Surrogacy Miracle

About this episode

Phil and Jonathan share their journey through adoption and surrogacy as a queer couple, highlighting the emotional challenges and intentional choices involved in building their family.

What happens when the path you thought you were on… just doesn’t work out? This week, we’re talking to Phil and Jonathan—two dads who spent three years in the adoption process before realizing it might not be how they’d build their family. We get into everything: the waiting, the emotional toll, the near misses, and what it’s like navigating a system that isn’t exactly built for queer families. And then—everything shifted. From choosing an egg donor to an unexpected offer from a best friend to become their gestational carrier, their story is a powerful reminder that queer family building rarely follows a straight line. We also talk about what it really means to intentionally choose parenthood as a queer couple—and how different that process is from the “let’s see what happens” approach many straight couples get to take. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, stuck, or unsure about your path to parenthood… this episode is for you. 🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways Queer parenthood is never accidental—it’s intentional, emotional, and often nonlinear. And sometimes, the path that doesn’t work out is the one that leads you exactly where you were meant to go. 🏳️‍🌈 About the guest(s) Phil is an…

People in this episode

Host: Jaimie Kelton

Guests: Phil, Jonathan

Topics covered

• queer parenthood
• adoption
• surrogacy
• family building
• emotional journey
• intentional parenting

Keywords

• queer families
• adoption process
• surrogacy
• gestational carrier
• parenthood choices

Mentioned in this episode

Books & works: Little Golden Book

More episodes of The Queer Family Podcast – LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories

• From Unexpected Pregnancy to Known Donor RIVF: A Queer Family Building & IVF Journey · May 4, 2026 · 33 min
• Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families: The “Do We Want Kids?” Conversation · April 20, 2026 · 49 min
• Queer Family Life, IVF & LGBTQ+ Parenting—And Why It All Feels So Hard Right Now · April 13, 2026 · 53 min
• A Very Real Family Update · April 6, 2026 · 13 min
• Foster to Adopt as a Gay Dad: Jameel Mayers’ Path to Parenthood · March 30, 2026 · 60 min
• Surrogacy for Gay Dads: Cost, Ethics & Building a Family · March 23, 2026 · 55 min