The Trauma Nerd

You judge yourself for being judgy. Then you judge yourself for judging your judgeme—ok, we're already exhausted. In this episode Helen discusses how judgements are relevant to trauma work, and how to figure out what your judgy thoughts are actually trying to tell you. Your judgment isn't the enemy. It's pointing to something. This week, follow it. 🎙️ Listen on Spotify, Apple or Youtube 📩 Join the mailing list Follow Helen: @helenbillows | @thetraumanerd

You don't have to be a perfect parent. But there is one thing that makes an enormous difference to what your child thinks about themselves, and it's not whether you lose your temper. It's what you do after. Young children can't separate what happens around them from what it means about them. When a rupture goes unaddressed, a child's brain doesn't file it under "mum was stressed." It files it somewhere far more personal. Repeated enough, that filing system can shape how they move through ...

Do you have a chronic case of the guilts? You're probably carrying more than your share. Most people assume responsibility is simple: either it's your fault or it isn't. But that binary rarely gets you to the truth. It distorts what actually happened and creates guilt that was never yours to carry. This episode covers: Why feeling responsible isn't the same as being responsibleHow the Responsibility Pie works and how to use itWhy chronic guilt is often a sign you're carrying slices that were ...

You've seen it everywhere. On social media, in the comments, maybe even from people who should probably know better. "Hurt people hurt people." The intention behind it isn't wrong, but somewhere along the way it became a get-out-of-jail-free card. And that's where Helen has a problem with it. Understanding someone's pain and excusing their behaviour are not the same thing — and conflating them causes real harm. This episode makes the case that accountability isn't the opposite of compas...

Some people knit. Helen reads trauma research for funsies. And now you get the good bits, without spending your nights googling. The Trauma Nerd is where evidence-based psychology meets the real experience of trauma, EMDR, and what actually happens inside the therapy room. Hosted by psychologist and EMDR consultant Helen Billows, this show covers complex concepts without losing the human underneath them. Episodes run under 30 minutes. No shortcuts, no oversimplification, no wellness faff. If ...