Yu Up? with Rachel Yu

Obi joins Rachel with a bold thesis: modern men are gold diggers — they’ve just rebranded it as “emotional stability.” They break down the coded language men use when dating (“good family,” “great circle,” “grounded”) and why many men aren’t looking for low-maintenance women — they want high-maintenance women whose lifestyle they don’t have to fund. From finance bros quietly “marrying up” to dating someone for their network, family wealth, or social status, the conversation flips the traditional gold digger narrative completely. They then introduce Obi’s “risk management framework” for avoiding these men: beware of hobbies, dreams (aka “potential”), and men who call themselves foodies. It spirals into confidence vs. competence, why mediocre men feel like CEOs, how women accidentally overcompensate to prove they’re not gold diggers, and why true value shows up as stability, problem-solving, and consistency. From prenups and power dynamics to why melting cheese on crackers is actually a relationship test — this episode is part dating guide, part economic analysis, and fully unhinged in the best way.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Obi O'Brien on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Britt joins Rachel with one very clear message: dump his ass. They unpack why women stay too long in toxic relationships — from lying, cheating, and yelling to emotional manipulation and “if he wanted to, he would” situationships. Britt shares her experience of staying in a deeply unhealthy marriage and how sunk cost fallacy, denial, and lack of examples kept her stuck longer than she should’ve been. The takeaway is simple: if he’s making your life worse, you don’t need to fix it — you need to leave. The conversation expands into what healthy love actually looks like: no screaming fights, just calm disagreements, mutual respect, and aligned values. They talk about red flags like misogyny, political incompatibility, and men who don’t even like women — and why dating within the queer community often feels safer and more emotionally aware. It ends on the real love story: your friends. Because when men disappoint, your girls will always be there — and honestly, they might be your real soulmates anyway.*I apologize for the scratchy audio in the second half of the episode. Didn't realize the recorder ran out of battery until after the recording. --Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Britt Migs on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Rebecca joins Rachel with a heavy but honest take: beauty standards aren’t just annoying — they’re emotionally and physically harming women. They unpack Western beauty ideals, global pressure to look “mixed,” and how women are expected to be both effortlessly beautiful and highly accomplished. From makeup with questionable ingredients to plastic surgery, pretty privilege, and dating dynamics, the conversation dives into how much of modern life is shaped by appearance — whether we admit it or not. They also wrestle with the contradiction: if beauty standards are harmful, why do so many of us still participate? From makeup as a “quick fix” for confidence to the deeper internal work no one wants to do, they explore personal choice vs societal pressure, online hate, and what it means to be a “bad feminist.” The episode ends on a quieter note — maybe the goal isn’t to escape beauty standards entirely, but to question them, loosen their grip, and occasionally walk outside exactly as you are.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Rebecca Kaplan on ⁠Instagram⁠ Follow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Susie joins Rachel for a deeply unwell debate about whether you should be friends with your ex, whether situationships are just mutual delusion, and why getting cheated on might actually be… a little fun. They unpack emotional power dynamics, blocking someone but secretly wanting them to stalk you, forgiving men too easily, and the toxic thrill of knowing you could ruin his next relationship (but choosing not to, because you’re “a good person”).They spiral into forehead kisses in casual situationships (illegal), commitment issues disguised as kindness, why busy is hot but sweet isn’t, and how being a comedian might be the ultimate cock block. Are they secure? Avoidant? Anxious? Both? Neither? They don’t know — but they are hot, healing, and absolutely not over it.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Susan Cavalcanti on Instagram Follow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Arjun joins Rachel with a hot take that immediately divides the room: if you’ve been on fewer than four dates and you’re not interested, just ghost. No “I’m not feeling it,” no delayed closure, no fake emotional maturity three days later. They break down why waiting is worse than silence, how everyone mentally processes rejection before it even happens, and why a late “kind” text actually hurts more than being ignored.From there, the conversation spirals into dating timelines, texting anxiety, age gaps, New York dating math, hot people ecosystems, and why “it’s not you, it’s me” is the biggest lie in human history. They debate shallow honesty, lying to protect feelings, Android’s unhinged follow-up reminders, and the radical belief that if someone is emotionally mature enough to reject you properly… you would’ve been perfect together. Chaotic, validating, and painfully real — like group therapy, but meaner and funnier.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Arjun Banerjee on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Sarah joins Rachel with an immediately unhinged hot take: men should be attracted to armpit hair and nipple hair — the longer, the better. What starts as a body-hair manifesto spirals into ponies vs. stallions, dominance logic, puberty trauma, ariolas (Saturn rings), and whether shaving nipple hair is a crime against nature. There’s also an unexpected detour into astrology, pregnancy paranoia, Gen Z aging anxiety, and the radical act of eating oatmeal at night.The episode then swerves hard into culture, race, and dating politics. They unpack Asian identity beyond East Asia, porn categories vs. real people, “weebs,” fetish vs. familiarity, Republican men with Asian obsessions, and why being called a “good listener” on a date is actually an insult. Along the way: stolen packages, USPS conspiracies, Chinese police efficiency, databases, dating apps as surveillance, capitalism ruining pajamas, and the conclusion that the solution to everything is simple — stop being a pony, grow thick skin, and be a stallion.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Sarah Thomas on Instagram and TikTokFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Charlotte joins Rachel for a very honest, very Gen Z debate about polyamory, monogamy, and the pressure to be “cool” in dating. They unpack why not everyone is meant to be poly, why jealousy TikToks feel like red flags instead of growth, and why having panic attacks every time your partner goes on a date might be a sign — and that sign is monogamy.The conversation spirals into first-date etiquette, whether honesty is overrated, why you don’t need to explain every breakup in detail, and the quiet power of euphemisms. They talk about manually selecting crushes, realizing you’re gay by accident, height lies on dating apps, housing markets ruining relationships, roommate politics, conflict avoidance, and the radical idea that you don’t need to force yourself into a relationship structure just to seem evolved.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Charlotte Polk on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Amanda joins Rachel after they meet in peak New York fashion — in full costume on the subway at 5 a.m. after an absurdly good Halloween party. Their conversation quickly moves into why sex is easy but real intimacy feels terrifying, and how hookup culture often replaces presence with performance. They talk about eye contact during sex, emotional avoidance, and the realization that you can be physically close without actually being seen.Amanda shares her path through personal development, somatic work, festivals, psychedelics, and becoming an “intentional party girl,” while Rachel reflects on connection, sobriety-curiosity, and what intimacy really means. The episode weaves through Burning Man, ego death, bad trips, and breathwork — landing on the idea that intimacy isn’t about access, it’s about presence.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Amanda Laurena on Instagram Follow Amandafest Podcast on Instagram and SpotifyFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Annie joins Rachel to talk about how she accidentally became a NYC Midtown facial spa owner after her mom casually said, “I found a place,” and signed a lease the next day. They get into facials, injections, hiring 19-year-old nail prodigies, and the fact that her mom literally injects her own face — the ultimate trust signal in beauty services.They also spiral into dating histories (Asian → Black → Hispanic → White men pipeline), the sociology of white-man boyfriends, the “Asian woman as tech-bro accessory” memes, and the Oxford study that no one can cite correctly.Annie drops her hot take: marriage should come with a contract expiration date — like a job — complete with performance reviews. They unpack aging, why Asian women supposedly don’t age (spoiler: it’s genes + happiness + tretinoin), and whether facials or nails matter more when you’re broke but want to feel hot.A chaotic, wholesome, surprisingly philosophical episode about beauty, business, and bad ex-boyfriends.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Being a funny woman should be hot, but somehow it’s a dating liability. Rachel and Rania dig into why straight men crumble the second a woman is funnier than they are. They talk insecure masculinity, comedy power dynamics, why men gain desirability from humor while women lose it, and why female comics feel pressured to dress down just to be taken seriously.They break down the open-mic ecosystem, ugly male comics with supermodel girlfriends, and why women are still expected to laugh at men’s jokes even when they’re painfully unfunny. The episode spirals into queer f*ckboy confessions, big-dick energy hypotheticals and childhood weirdness. This episode is chaotic, honest, and way too relatable especially if you are a woman in the show biz.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Rania Hannan on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠

Minji and Rachel discover they might share a mutual curiosity about having a threesome — and yes, the sexual tension was very real. Minji talks about the time she slept with a woman who faked an orgasm, which left her deeply traumatized. They dive into Korean and Chinese culture — including the fact that they’ve both eaten dog — and had a friendly debate on whether it’s Lunar New Year or Chinese New Year. Dating comedians also makes an appearance, because of course it does.Rachel edited the podcast so the spicy stuff comes first. It was originally at the end, but she knew you’d lose your mind if you had to wait.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Minji Ko on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠TikTok

Lucie and Rachel dive into the chaos of love in your 20s — from not being ready for babies (or baby weight) to the undeniable power of pretty privilege. Both have had men tell them their beauty is “worth dying for” . The conversation then spirals into all the ways they’ve been scammed — out of time, nudes, money, and yes… love. Their scammer hall of fame includes a "comedy booker", a horny "casting director", a shady ticket reseller, and, of course, an OnlyFans model. Because in this economy, romance is a scam.--Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠Follow Lucie Fleming on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠ and ⁠TikTok

As two Chinese women born and raised in China, Victoria and Rachel can’t help but wonder — do guys in the U.S. actually like them, or do they just have an Asian fetish? Somewhere between unpacking beauty standards and identity crises, Rachel admits she might secretly want to be a white woman (?!), and Victoria shares dating stories so wild it’ll make you rethink dating altogether. This episode is unhinged, hilarious, and a little too real. --Follow the host Rachel Yu on ⁠Instagram⁠, ⁠YouTube⁠, and ⁠TikTok⁠Follow Victoria Zhou on InstagramFollow the show on ⁠Instagram⁠, ⁠YouTube, and TikTok