Love Letters

Zachary Reese is a social psychologist who studies close relationships. He also focuses on self-disclosure – meaning, what we share with others. Do you feel like you don’t know how to make friends at work? Do you wonder whether you should turn a professional experience into a more personal bond? Are you constantly wondering, “Did I say too much about myself?” and second-guessing what you tell people you just met? Listen as Meredith and Zachary talk about sharing … while sharing with each other. So meta. Remember, Love Letters has a Friends With Benefits Club with a free extra episodes, an ad-free experience, and swag. Sign up at Globe.com/loveletters/friendswithbenefits. We are grateful for all support. Also, please send a letter about what’s happening in your relationship life to our long-running advice column. You can submit anonymous questions through our anonymous form. When you ask a question, you help others feel less alone. Studies, books, and research Zachary and I mention in this episode: “Talk: The Science of Conversation and the Art of Being Ourselves by Allison Wood Brooks. Nick Epley’s work on shallowness in conversation. Ethan Cross’s research on self-disclosure. Work about in-person vs. written communication in Nature Communications. Micaela Rodriguez’s work about how being single makes it possible to grow.  Reporting by Jonathan Woodward at Religion News Service. Love Letters is a production of The Boston Globe. This short series about All Kinds of Love is brought to you in partnership with the Greater Good Science Center’s "Spreading Love Through the Media" initiative, funded by the John Templeton Foundation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In our last episode, we learned how loving a boy band can help us love each other. We told the story of Theresa, a 50-something New Kids on the Block fan, who got a life-saving medical assist from Christina, another fan, who stepped up for a stranger simply because they both love NKOTB.In this follow-up episode, Bryant University assistant professor Melanie Maimon – who studies the psychology of belonging – explains how being part of a community of fans can help us develop relationships. If we love something (music, art, books, etc.) and are around likeminded others, we might be on our way to forming important platonic and romantic connections. Maimon herself is a Fall Out Boy fan. When she’s at a concert, she assumes the best of people around her – like she’s may have found her group As Fall Out Boy might put it, “I was just an only child of the universe … and then I found you.” (If you know that lyric, you're a real one.)Meredith and Maimon also get into how lonely it can feel when fans of the same artist don’t agree with each other about everything. (A timely conversation with news about Ed Sheeran, Macklemore, etc.)This episode is part of a special Love Letters series about all kinds of love. We wanted to tell these stories because without our platonic and community connections, romance is less healthy and fun. This “All Kinds of Love” series is supported by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, as part of its "Spreading Love Through the Media" initiative, supported by the John Templeton Foundation. Remember, Love Letters is an advice column. You can send anonymous questions about friendship, dating, marriage, divorce, messy breakups, dating fatigue, situationships, etc. through our anonymous form.Also remember: we now have a Friends With Benefits program. You can get ad-free episodes, a bonus episode a month, extended cuts of episodes, and Love Letters swag by signing up at loveletters.supportingcast.fm. INCOGNI Deal: To get an exclusive 60% off an annual Incogni plan, go to incogni.com/LOVELETTERS Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices