E29 - Nick Duffell - Understanding Ex-Boarding School Men's Marriages

E29 - Nick Duffell - Understanding Ex-Boarding School Men's Marriages

From Monumental Podcast by Pete Hunt

April 1, 2025 · 56 min · Season 1 · Episode 29

About this episode

Pete Hunt interviews Nick Duffell about the emotional challenges faced by men from boarding school backgrounds.

In this powerful episode, Pete Hunt sits down with Nick Duffell, psychotherapist, author, and pioneer of work around boarding school trauma. They explore why so many high-achieving men with these privileged backgrounds feel emotionally stuck, the hidden impact of early survival strategies, and how intimacy becomes one of life’s greatest challenges. A raw and essential listen for men navigating midlife, relationships, and identity. Timestamps    00:00 – Introduction 01:29 – Why relationships are so hard for men 04:46 – Boarding school and emotional shutdown 07:52 – The missing emotional training 11:15 – Listening as a lost skill 15:08 – Survivor roles and disconnection 22:04 – The gift of emotional energy 24:06 – The mother wound 32:00 – The child self in adult relationships 36:10 – Institutional life vs. intimacy 43:00 – The missing father figure 47:02 – Mentorship and male role models 50:00 – The impact of porn and overstimulation 53:40 – Power through vulnerability To find out more about the private network that Pete founded for growth focused leaders, visit www.monumental.global

People in this episode

Host: Pete Hunt

Guest: Nick Duffell

Topics covered

  • boarding school trauma
  • emotional intimacy
  • male relationships
  • midlife challenges
  • emotional training

Keywords

  • boarding school
  • emotional shutdown
  • intimacy
  • male role models
  • midlife relationships
  • survivor roles
  • emotional energy

Mentioned in this episode

Books & works: Monumental Podcast

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