When You Feel Nothing... Divorce Numbness

When You Feel Nothing... Divorce Numbness

From Pulling Threads, Weaving Authenticity by Leslie Mathews

March 27, 2026 · 20 min

About this episode

Leslie Mathews explores the phenomenon of emotional numbness after divorce and betrayal, explaining its connection to the nervous system and offering insights on recovery.

You expected grief. You expected rage. What you didn't expect was... nothing.In this episode, Leslie unpacks the science behind that strange, flat, disconnected feeling that so many women experience after betrayal and divorce — and why it's not emptiness, weakness, or avoidance.It's called dorsal vagal shutdown. And it might be the most protective thing your body has ever done for you.Learn what's happening in your nervous system, why it makes complete sense, and five gentle ways to begin finding your way back to yourself.You are not broken. You are protected. And you will feel again.The feeling of nothing has a name — and understanding it changes how you see yourself completely.When the threat is too large or too sustained, your nervous system doesn't always fight or fall apart. Sometimes it does something else entirely. It goes quiet. Flat. Still. And it does this not because something is wrong with you — but because something very right is happening inside your body.Polyvagal Theory & Your Three Nervous System StatesIn this episode, Leslie introduces Polyvagal Theory — developed by neuroscientist Dr. Stephen Porges — and explains the three states your nervous system moves…

People in this episode

Host: Leslie

Topics covered

  • divorce
  • nervous system
  • Polyvagal Theory
  • emotional numbness
  • mental health

Keywords

  • dorsal vagal shutdown
  • grief
  • rage
  • protection
  • self-discovery

Mentioned in this episode

Books & works: When You Feel Nothing

More episodes of Pulling Threads, Weaving Authenticity

Explore listener stats, chart rankings, contacts and more on the Pulling Threads, Weaving Authenticity podcast page.