Betrayal, Infidelity & Trust: Dr. Stan Tatkin on Why Relationships Fail (and How to Repair Them)

About this episode

Dr. Stan Tatkin discusses the causes of betrayal in relationships and how to repair trust after infidelity.

Book a Discovery Call for Relationship Renovation Coaching What actually causes betrayal in relationships? Is it about sex, disconnection, or something deeper? In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Stan Tatkin , founder of the PACT Institute and one of the leading voices in relationship science, to break down what really happens when trust is broken—and what it actually takes to repair it. Dr. Tatkin challenges many common beliefs about infidelity and introduces a powerful reframe: Betrayal isn’t just about what happened. It’s about what was hidden. When critical information is withheld, it can completely destabilize a relationship—creating symptoms that often mirror trauma, including anxiety, obsession, and loss of safety. We explore why betrayal impacts the brain so deeply, why many couples struggle to recover, and what separates relationships that survive from those that don’t. In this episode, we discuss: • Why betrayal is a trauma response , not just a relationship issue • The real definition of infidelity (beyond cheating) • How withholding information destroys trust and agency • Why “why did this happen?” is often the wrong question • The role of accountability…

People in this episode

Hosts: EJ Kerwin, Tarah Kerwin

Guest: Dr. Stan Tatkin

Topics covered

• betrayal
• infidelity
• trust
• relationship repair
• trauma response
• communication

Keywords

• betrayal
• infidelity
• trust issues
• relationship repair
• trauma
• communication
• accountability

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: PACT Institute

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