No Parental Guidance

Can you make it through these stories without laughing? Because we certainly couldn’t. In this episode of No Parental Guidance, Hannah and Louise take on the "Last One Laughing" Challenge. Inspired by the hit show, they go head-to-head to see who can keep a straight face while sharing the most "educational" (and by educational, we mean absolutely traumatizing) parenting moments. Things take a turn very quickly as we dive into your NPG Community Fails. We’re talking about everything from accidental public broadcasts about butt plugs to the now-legendary "Bat’s Nose" observation that has changed how we look at anatomy forever. In this episode: The LOL Challenge: Hannah and Louise try to keep it together while discussing "poo hands" and swimming pool disasters. The Bluetooth Betrayal: Why you should always check your car settings before listening to us at the beach. The "Bat's Nose": A 4-year-old’s brutal honesty that sent us straight to Google Images (and we regret it). Toast Trauma & Sheep Milk: The wedding day mishap you have to hear to believe. Are you a "Bat Enthusiast" or just a parent hanging by a thread? Let us know your biggest fail in the comments! Love the show? Make sure to LIKE and SUBSCRIBE! :bell: New episodes every Monday and Wednesday. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, we’re getting an unfiltered look at life on the parenting front line with Lou Beckett. From hypno-birthing playlists going completely ignored, to the first night at home descending into chaos, Lou shares it all. It’s messy, hilarious, and often painfully relatable. We also cover the everyday battles: navigating tantrums on trains, surviving homework sessions that make you question modern education, and the small victories that make parenting just about bearable like organising toys (sort of), and sneaking in a few moments of calm. Beyond the laughs, Lou shares the wisdom of experience: how to stay sane when kids push your buttons, why communication is key with co-parenting, and why sometimes the best thing you can do is take a deep breath and ride it out. Funny, honest, and deeply validating, this episode is perfect for any parent who’s ever thought, “I can’t believe this is my life right now!” Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod No Parental Guidance is the unfiltered parenting podcast that says the quiet parts out loud and makes you feel a lot less alone in the chaos. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, we’re diving headfirst into the chaotic, hilarious, and often horrifying world of parenting fails. From explosive diaper disasters to kitchen speaker mishaps, nothing is off-limits. Listeners share their most unforgettable parenting fails, including: a baby’s first football practice ending in projectile vomit, a husband’s “private moment” blaring through the kitchen speaker, and a mix-up with haemorrhoid cream doubling as toothpaste. It’s messy, mortifying, and painfully relatable. We also celebrate the little wins that keep parents sane: mastering drop-and-go birthday parties, sneaking in a coffee break, and even finding a moment to get a bit of work done while the kids are occupied. Because sometimes survival looks like an iPad, a raspberry-white chocolate muffin, and a brief pause from the chaos. Beyond the fails, there’s honest advice for new parents: everyone’s journey is different, standards can be adjusted, and yes, you really will survive, even if it feels like the Antichrist just came home for a visit. Funny, honest, and deeply validating, this episode is for anyone who’s ever thought, “how is this still happening?!” Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod No Parental Guidance is the unfiltered parenting podcast that says the quiet parts out loud and makes you feel a lot less alone in the chaos. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, things get a little bit spicy as Hannah and Louise invite Ashley James on to help them clap back at some wild comments left on their Instagram. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This bonus episode is packed with parenting fails, holiday drama, and the real-life chaos of raising kids while trying to survive your own sanity.Emily and the team dissect the chaos, the panic, and the heroic improvisation that followed, including dry tissues, emergency wipes, and a toddler completely unbothered by it all.From there, Emily opens up about her own parenting journey - breastfeeding struggles, formula guilt, pumping in stadiums, and all the messy, emotional, hilarious realities of motherhood. She’s refreshingly honest about feeling like a “failure” when in reality she was doing just fine, and she shares the lessons that helped her survive those early years without losing her mind.Then it’s onto kids, social media, and Snapchat disasters. From mortifying phone fails to accidental live streams and the awkwardness of trying to film content while wrangling children, Emily spills the funny and stressful moments that parents everywhere will recognise.The episode also touches on family holidays, sunbed wars, and what it really means to maintain calm while your kids, other guests, and random strangers push every button imaginable.Warm, witty, and completely unfiltered, this is the kind of parenting therapy session you’ll want to send to every mum or dad who’s surviving the small disasters and big embarrassments of family life.Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepodNo Parental Guidance is the unfiltered, laugh-out-loud parenting podcast that cuts through the impossible standards of Instagram parenting with honesty, chaos, and empathy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by the actual icon Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Pop star, kitchen disco queen, mum of five boys and proof that some people really can spin every plate without launching one directly at the wall. We obviously have to talk about the Saltburn moment. Sophie reveals how she got an email back in 2022 asking to use her song Murder on the Dance Floor, thought it was lovely, signed it off, and then only found out much later exactly what kind of naked, chaotic, slightly sinister dancing was going to happen to it. The way she describes it is so funny and so alarming, and honestly, once you’ve heard it you can never listen to that track the same way again. Sophie also gets properly real about the long game of parenting when you’ve got kids spanning nearly 15 years. She’s got one in his early 20s, two teens, and a youngest who’s just turned seven, and the dynamic is fascinating. She talks about the older sibling bond, how brothers tell each other things they will never tell you, and how weirdly emotional it can be watching relationships form in your house that have nothing to do with you. There’s also a brilliant chat about how parenting trends have changed over the years, from naughty step culture to the era of “I see your anger”, plus the absolute noise of school WhatsApp groups and how everything now arrives at the same level of urgency. One minute it’s an email, the next it’s block capitals, and suddenly you’re spiralling because your mum hasn’t replied and you’re convinced she’s actually dead. Then we get into identity and work, and Sophie is so refreshing about it. She talks about becoming a mum in her mid 20s and feeling like the world expected her to disappear into nappies and never be seen again. She opens up about how clunky it can feel at first, how the first baby knocked her sideways, and then how she actually found her flow the more kids she had. Including the casual reveal that she once recorded a vocal while feeding a baby, which is either iconic or witchcraft. Before Sophie joins, Hannah and Louise are in full mum mode too. There’s a very honest rant about how most of parenting is just being asked to locate items from the third shelf down on the left. Plus the classic moment where your kid says “Mummy” and you brace for a crisis, sprint in like someone’s about to lose a limb, and they just want to show you their game score. Which somehow they interpret as you being thrilled, so they keep doing it forever. Warm, hilarious, surprisingly emotional in places, and full of the kind of chaos that makes you feel less alone, this one is such a good listen. Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by Hilary Whitehall actress, podcaster, former doula, long-time wife of Michael, mum to Jack, Molly and Barnaby and now a grandmother with another grandchild on the way! Hilary is absolutely hilarious and delivers one of the most jaw-dropping birth stories we’ve ever heard, involving a very famous godfather, a hospital mix-up and black tie attire. Honestly, you couldn’t write it! Hilary also opens up about her decade working as a doula and what new mums really need in those first overwhelming weeks, from building confidence to cutting through guilt and panic. Plus, she talks about becoming a grandmother and why looking after someone else’s kids hits differently... especially when scooters are involved. And just when you think it can’t get any wilder, Hilary shares one of her worst parenting moments: accidentally running over her toddler in France and the horrifying second where she thought she’d killed him. Before Hilary joins, Hannah and Louise are in full chaos mode. Hannah forgets an inset day and sends her son to a locked school, then her daughter gets hold of her phone and accidentally messages the entire class WhatsApp. Louise shares a post-op Christmas horror story featuring a catheter, a night bag, and a husband who trips, falls, and sets off total mayhem in the middle of the night. There’s also a very honest chat about kids growing up and the moment the awkward questions start coming thick and fast, plus Hilary’s take on raising polite kids, being a “bossy grandmother”, and the slightly genius trick she used to get her kids to bed early. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by Sam and Alice Vanderpump - reality TV meets real-life parenting prep as the couple open up about expecting their first baby (a boy!) and what they’re actually feeling at 35 weeks pregnant. Sam and Alice talk morning sickness that’s never really left, multiple hospital visits, and the reality of going into parenthood with “no idea what’s coming.” They share the story behind their baby name Marmaduke - including the emotional family reason it means so much, and laugh through the chaos of being last-minute parents-to-be (hospital bags un-packed… and somehow the plan still includes white silk pyjamas). But it’s not all jokes: Sam speaks openly about being on the liver transplant waiting list, and the conversation turns into a powerful and very important message about organ donation, and why telling your family your wishes matters more than people realise. Before Sam and Alice join, Hannah and Louise are deep in the trenches: Hannah arrives running on fumes after a brutal night of toddler vomiting (eight towels later…), and Louise confesses a truly elite packed-lunch fail after discovering that chutney and strawberry jam look identical when you’re moving too fast. Hilarious, honest, and unexpectedly moving; this episode is for anyone who’s ever been exhausted, overwhelmed, and trying to laugh through the chaos... join us. NHS Organ Donation - official UK organ donation website: https://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/ Register your decision on the NHS Organ Donor Register: https://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/register-your-decision/ This episode is proudly sponsor. January is the perfect time to get that summer glow booked in! Whether you’re looking for a family-friendly villa or a luxury escape, check out Jet2Holidays to find your perfect 2026 getaway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices