Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

In this episode of Perfect Prey I’m joined by my friend and colleague Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist, author, professor, and internationally recognized expert on narcissistic abuse. We dig into why coercive control feels like imprisonment without bars, how systems (including family court) retraumatize survivors, and what survivors can do to protect themselves and their children. What we coverWhy coercive control is often invisible — and why the myth of “free will” makes it so hard for institutions to understand emotional abuse.How victim-blaming and the DARVO pattern (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim & Offender) let abusers manipulate sympathy in court.The difference between milder narcissistic traits and the kind of malignant, coercive abuse that creates real danger and CPTSD-like responses.Practical, trauma-informed strategies for surviving family court: what to document, when to prioritize safety over “justice,” and how to protect your children while minimizing retraumatization.The “industrial divorce complex” — how systems and money can deepen harm, and what survivors can do strategically to preserve their safety and sense of self.Why listen If you’re a survivor, a clinician, a legal professional, or someone trying to understand a loved one’s experience, this conversation names the harms you may not see on the surface and gives clear, compassionate guidance for staying safe and getting validated. You’ll hear clinical insight paired with real-world, tactical advice about custody, court behavior, and how to build a safety-first plan.Guest bio (short) Dr. Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist, author, and media expert who writes and speaks widely about narcissism, personality disorders, and relationship dynamics. She maintains a clinical practice and educational network focused on helping people heal from narcissistic relationships. Connect with Dr. Ramani:Official site: https://doctor-ramani.com/drn/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@DoctorRamaniTiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@doctorramaniIG: https://www.instagram.com/doctorramani/Podcast: Navigating Narcissism with Dr. RamaniBooks: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/Ramani-Durvasula/author/B00C2C5U0O?ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=trueConnect with Dr. Christine:Protective Parenting Program: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/Official site: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videosTiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrolIG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/TEDxTalks: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4&t=24sBooks: https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBookhttps://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDayIf this episode landed for you: share it with someone who needs to hear it, subscribe for more trauma-informed conversations, and leave a rating — it helps more survivors find validation and safety.— Dr. Christine Cocchiola & guest Dr. Ramani Durvasula

In this episode of Perfect Prey, I sit down with Vanessa Reiser, LCSW, a renowned psychotherapist, speaker, and advocate who has dedicated her career to helping survivors of narcissistic abuse and coercive control reclaim their lives. Vanessa is the founder of Tell a Therapist, a nationwide telehealth platform, and the author of Narcissistic Abuse: A Therapist’s Guide, a groundbreaking resource that not only unpacks the devastating impact of narcissistic and cult abuse but also offers clinicians the training and tools they need to support survivors in the healing process.Together, we explore what coercive control looks like in real life. We talk about why certain people are more vulnerable to narcissistic abuse, the toll it takes on mental health, and how survivors can begin to recognize the patterns and break free.We also shine a light on the unique challenges survivors face in family court when narcissistic abuse is involved, and why therapist training in this area is so urgently needed. Vanessa’s book is an essential guide for professionals and survivors alike, offering not just insight but hope—that recovery is possible, and that healing from narcissistic abuse is about reclaiming your voice, your power, and your life.Connect with Vanessa:Narcissistic Abuse: A Therapist’s Guide: https://www.amazon.com/Narcissistic-Abuse-Therapists-Identifying-Manipulative/dp/0306833174Tell a Therapist: https://tellatherapist.net/Follow Vanessa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vanessareiserlcsw/Resources Mentioned in this Podcast:🔸Follow Dr. Christine on IG: www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol🔸Services for Professionals: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-professionals/🔸Private Coaching: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/private-coaching/🔸Free Guide: Clinical Implications for Children Who Are Coercively Controlled: https://drchristinemarie.kartra.com/page/childvictimofccgrowthguide

In this episode of Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast, Dr. Christine Cocchiola sits down with Dr. Peter Salerno to take a deeper look at the hidden dynamics of coercive control and the psychological abuse that entraps partners and children in cycles of fear, confusion, and dependency.We explore the defining traits of coercive controllers, how they manipulate both adult and child victims, and why survivors often struggle with cognitive dissonance, a mental conflict that can keep them tethered to abusive relationships long after the harm is clear. Together, we discuss the traumatic impact of cognitive dissonance, how abusers condition children to adopt distorted beliefs, and what protective strategies parents can use to safeguard their children’s well-being.You’ll also hear about the crucial role of trauma-informed therapy, ways to respond intentionally to children’s conditioned behaviors, and how survivors can begin to break free from the psychological grip of coercive control.This conversation sheds light on the complex psychological dynamics of abuse and offers practical steps for supporting both adults and children who have been targeted by coercive controllers.If you’ve ever felt trapped in a relationship that left you doubting your own reality, or if you’re working to protect children from ongoing manipulation, this episode will give you clarity, tools, and hope for the path forward.Connect with Dr. Peter Salerno:Website: https://www.drpetersalerno.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drpetersalerno/Book a Consultation: https://www.drpetersalerno.com/new-page-1Book: https://www.drpetersalerno.com/new-pageResources Mentioned in this Podcast:🔸Follow Dr. Christine on IG: www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol🔸Services for Parents: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/🔸Services for Professionals: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-professionals/🔸Services for Victims of Abuse: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-individuals/🔸Private Coaching: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/private-coaching/🔸Free Guide: Clinical Implications for ChildrenWho Are Coercively Controlled: https://drchristinemarie.kartra.com/page/childvictimofccgrowthguide

In this episode of Perfect Prey, I sit down with filmmaker and NXIVM Whistleblower, Mark Vicente, to explore the insidious nature of narcissism and coercive control. Known for his role in exposing the NXIVM cult and for his upcoming documentary Narcissist Playbook, Mark brings a rare blend of lived experience and narrative insight to a conversation that is both deeply personal and profoundly educational.Together, we examine how narcissistic abuse thrives on confusion, manipulation, and silence. Coercive control isn't always visible—often it hides in plain sight, eroding a survivor’s sense of self through emotional, psychological, and sometimes spiritual abuse. Mark shares how he came to recognize the patterns of power and control he endured, and why storytelling and awareness are key to dismantling these dynamics.As a licensed clinical social worker and survivor of coercive control myself, this conversation is one I know will resonate. We talk about the trauma of emotional abuse, the grooming tactics abusers use to gain and maintain control, and the long road to healing after escaping these toxic dynamics. Mark’s courage and clarity offer validation to those still trying to make sense of what happened to them, and hope to those who are just beginning to find their voice.This is more than a podcast episode… it’s a call to awareness, to healing, and to action. Tune in to better understand the trauma of coercive control and narcissistic relationships, and to remember that your truth is the first step toward freedom.Connect with Mark:Mark's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/?hl=enNarcissist Playbook Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissistsplaybook/?hl=enWebsite: https://www.empathynotincluded.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/Listen to Mark's Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wtf-is-on-my-mind/id1646783869Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX1OsELrINqvPVImbyM6qdQResources Mentioned in this Podcast:🔸Follow Dr. Christine on IG: www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol🔸Services for Parents: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/🔸Services for Professionals: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-professionals/🔸Services for Victims of Abuse: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-individuals/🔸Private Coaching: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/private-coaching/🔸Free Guide: Clinical Implications for ChildrenWho Are Coercively Controlled: https://drchristinemarie.kartra.com/page/childvictimofccgrowthguide

In this episode, Jessi Hersey bravely shares her story of surviving two forms of coercive control: childhood grooming by her drum teacher and emotional manipulation within the Twin Flames Universe online cult. As a neurodivergent survivor, Jessi reflects on how her autism both made her more vulnerable and more attuned to subtle forms of abuse. She discusses the long-term impact of grooming, the cult’s use of “mirror exercises” to control beliefs, and her journey to reclaim safety and identity. Jessi’s story highlights the urgent need for awareness around neurodivergence, grooming, and online spiritual coercion.---🔸Follow Dr. Christine on IG: www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol🔸Visit her website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com🔸Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled.🔸Sign up here: https://go.drcocchiola.com/accelerated2-selfstudy