Bad marriage advice with Monica Tanner

Bad marriage advice with Monica Tanner

From This Complex Life by Marie Vakakis

May 4, 2026 · 32 min · Episode 107

About this episode

Marie Vakakis discusses common misconceptions in relationship advice with guest Monica Tanner, a relationship coach.

You've probably received the same relationship advice everyone gets. Never go to bed angry. Just communicate more. Send them the link. Some of it sounds reasonable and most of it gets misapplied in ways that create more problems than they solve. Monica Tanner is a Relational Life Therapy certified relationship coach, podcast host and author of the Amazon bestselling book Bad Marriage Advice, and she joins me to talk about what couples have been taught that isn't actually helping them, and what works instead. What this episode covers Why never going to bed angry is one of the most misunderstood pieces of relationship advice and what it was actually meant to mean The HALTS acronym and why timing matters more than most couples realise when trying to work through conflict Monica's thought download exercise: how to separate what's actually happened from the story you're telling yourself about it Why an outsized reaction from your partner is almost never about what's happening right in front of you What Relational Life Therapy is and how the three phase approach works with couples The wise adult versus the adaptive child and what bringing yourself back online actually looks like in a…

People in this episode

Host: Marie Vakakis

Guest: Monica Tanner

Topics covered

  • relationship advice
  • communication
  • conflict resolution
  • Relational Life Therapy
  • couples therapy

Keywords

  • relationship advice
  • communication
  • conflict
  • Relational Life Therapy
  • couples

Mentioned in this episode

Books & works: Bad Marriage Advice

More episodes of This Complex Life

Explore listener stats, chart rankings, contacts and more on the This Complex Life podcast page.