Ask Lisa: Untangling Family Life

You may know this scene: your kid forgot practice gear again, an assignment vanished into the void, and you're wondering if your teen is just disorganized — or is there something more serious going on? That mix of exhaustion and frustration is real. Chasing lost details, worrying that you may have dropped the ball, wondering if you're overreacting to normal middle school or high school organization struggles, or missing something bigger — you're allowed to feel all of that without it meaning you're failing anyone. Here's some good news: the part of the brain that handles executive functioning is still under construction all through high school and doesn't fully come online until your kid reaches their mid-20s. So a teen who can't stay organized, forgets homework, or misses details isn't revealing a character flaw. It's a work-in-progress brain doing exactly what a work-in-progress brain does. Today's guest, Dr. Tori Cordiano, walks us through how to lower the bar on what counts as "normal," and build a few sturdy tools for executive function instead of expecting your teen to self-manage it all. She talks through how to let natural consequences do some of the teaching, and how tying responsibilities to what your teen actually cares about is often more motivating than punishment ever is.  Stay curious, and know there's a clear sign for when consistent struggles and concerning school feedback it's worth pursuing an evaluation. You've got more room here than you think. Dr. Lisa Damour is a clinical psychologist, New York Times bestselling author, and globally recognized expert on adolescent development who partners with UNICEF to support parents worldwide. Dr. Tori Cordiano is a licensed clinical psychologist, speaker, and writer specializing in child and adolescent development. In her private practice, she provides comprehensive evaluations, parent consultation, and psychotherapy, alongside a virtual course for parents on executive functioning and a regular newsletter. Dr. Cordiano also serves as a consulting psychologist and Co-Director of the Center for Research for Girls at Laurel School. Dr. Cordiano’s executive functioning course for parents, consultation services, and professional speaking: drtoricordiano.com The Time Timer: https://www.timetimer.com/ ________________ Parenting a tween or teen? Buckle up. Ask Lisa: Untangling Family Life tackles the questions that keep parents up at night — academics, friendships, mental health, screens, meltdowns, and more. Every week, psychologist Lisa Damour teams up with a different expert to answer a real parent's real question — no fluff, no judgment, just practical, evidence-based advice you can actually use. Dr. Damour and her colleagues also turn their attention to the emotional rollercoaster of raising kids — the moments that leave you feeling uneasy, overwhelmed, or just plain alone. You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to hit play. ________________ Today's sponsors: Jones Road Beauty:  Use the code ASKLISA for a free full sized Mascara with your first purchase at ⁠https://www.jonesroadbeauty.com⁠. Momentous: Get up to 35% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https:// Shopify: Sign up for your free trial today at ⁠https://www.shopify.com/asklisa⁠ Skylight: Get $30 off your 15-inch calendar a www://www.MySkylight.com/ASKLISA________________ disorganized teen, teen executive functioning, executive functioning help for teens, ADHD vs normal teen behavior, is my teen disorganized or ADHD, 9th grader struggling in school, teen can’t stay organized, help my teen remember homework, teen time management tips, tools for teen executive function, visual timer for kids, phone alarms for homework, Sunday planning routine for families, supporting ADHD in high school, natural consequences for teens, motivating unmotivated teen, tween organization skills, middle school executive function, high school organization skills ask lisa podcast, lisa damour, dr lisa damour, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting help, family dynamics, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence, emotional lives of parents, parent wellbeing, parental mental health, parenting stress, parent self-care, parent burnout, parenting emotions, lisa damour book, the emotional lives of parents, parenting experts, child psychologist, parenting research, evidence-based parenting, voicing change media Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The college admissions process doesn't have to consume your family. If it already feels that way, this episode is exactly what you need. Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan revisit their conversation with Rick Clark, higher education leader, co-author of “The Truth About College Admission: A Family Guide to Getting In and Staying Together,” and a career insider in college admissions at Georgia Tech. Rick has spent years helping families cut through the noise, anxiety, and mythology of the admissions process, and his perspective is grounding and genuinely reassuring.  💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why there is no magic formula for college admissions, and why that's actually good news for your teen - What a strong college essay actually looks like — and the one mistake that sinks more applications than any other - How to structure college conversations so they don't bleed into every carpool and dinner, protecting your relationship and your sanity through the process - Why "test optional" means something different at every school, and how to use net price calculators to get a realistic picture of what college will actually cost - Why you should be talking to parents of current college students, not parents of other applicants — and what a difference that shift makes The college admissions process can be stressful, but it doesn't have to take all of the joy out of family life. ________________  GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠  DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠  UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠  VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Today's sponsors: Cash App: For a limited time, new Cash App customers can earn $10 if they use code: FAMILY10. Momentous: Get up to 35% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.livemomentous.com⁠ Unwaffle: Use the promo code ASK LISA to get 15% off your first order at https://www.eatunwaffle.com. Warby Parker: Buy one prescription pair of glasses and get 20% off any additional prescription pairs at ⁠https://www.WarbyParker.com/ASKLISA ⁠⁠ ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: college admissions process parents, when to start college planning kids, college application stress parents, how to help teen with college applications, what colleges look for admissions, college essay tips high school, test optional colleges explained, should my teen take SAT or ACT, how to stand out college application, college admissions myths parents, how competitive is college admission today, paying for college financial aid tips, FAFSA explained parents, athletic scholarships reality high school, college admissions anxiety teens parents Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know screens and social media can be risky for your kid. But do you know exactly what harm looks like… and what actually protects them from it? Dr. Lisa Damour revisits her conversation with Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, pioneering pediatrician, author, and California's first Surgeon General, recorded live at the Common Sense Summit on Kids and Families. A globally recognized expert on Adverse Childhood Experiences and toxic stress, Dr. Burke Harris has spent her career studying what harms children and what heals them. Her answer to the screen time crisis might surprise you: the most powerful protection isn't stricter screen time rules; it's your relationship with your child. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why a strong, connected relationship with a caregiver is the single most powerful buffer against the harms of toxic online content and manipulative algorithms - How to invite your kid to share disturbing things they've seen online (and the specific language that keeps that door open) - Why teaching kids to see the manipulation behind the content, not just the content itself, builds real, lasting resistance to toxic content - How to tie phone and social media access to developmental readiness, not just age — including how a digital citizenship contract works in practice - The two questions that help teens reflect on whether they're choosing their content or their content is choosing them ________________  GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠  DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠  UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠  VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Today's sponsors: Shopify: Sign up for your free trial today at ⁠https://www.shopify.com/asklisa⁠ Goodr: Get $10 off your first order at https://www.goodr.com/ASKLISA Understood: Check out Everyone Gets a Juice Box wherever you listen to podcasts. ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: nadine burke harris, toxic stress in kids, adverse childhood experiences, ACEs parenting, kids and online content, teen smartphone rules, when to give child a phone, phone contract for teens, teen social media harm, kids seeing disturbing content online, boys and body image social media, teen appearance pressure, AI risks for kids, algorithm manipulation teens, teen screen time rules, buffering caregiving Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If mealtimes in your home feel like a power struggle, or you're exhausted from worrying whether your kid is eating well, this episode will come as a relief. Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan revisit their conversation with Dr. Reshma Shah, a Stanford-affiliated pediatrician, public health expert, and co-author of the award-winning book “Nourish: The Definitive Plant-Based Nutrition Guide for Families.” With over 20 years of experience in academic and clinical pediatrics and a deep commitment to family-centered approaches to food and wellbeing, Dr. Shah offers a low-pressure, evidence-based roadmap for helping kids develop a healthy relationship with food. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why what you model at the table matters far more than what you say, and how your own relationship with food shapes your child's more than you realize - Why "clean your plate" rules and other tension-raising practices can backfire (and what a low-stress mealtime actually looks like in practice) - How the language you use around food shapes your child's relationship with eating, and why ditching "good" and "bad" food labels makes a real difference - How to expand your kid's palate and involve them in food choices and preparation in ways that actually work - Why family meals (even brief, imperfect ones) have lasting benefits for your child's nutrition, wellbeing, and your relationship with them It’s not about eating perfectly—it’s about creating a healthy food environment. ________________ GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠  DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠  UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠  VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Today's sponsors: Goodr: Get $10 off your first order at https://www.goodr.com/ASKLISA Unwaffle: Use the promo code ASK LISA to get 15% off your first order at https://www.eatunwaffle.com. Warby Parker: Buy one prescription pair of glasses and get 20% off any additional prescription pairs at ⁠https://www.WarbyParker.com/ASKLISA ⁠⁠ Momentous: Get up to 35% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.livemomentous.com⁠ ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: help kids healthy relationship with food, teen nutrition tips, tween nutrition tips, how to get kids to eat vegetables, picky eater teenager help, reduce food battles with kids, stop food power struggles, kids sugar addiction help, teen junk food obsession, how much protein do kids need, healthy snacks for teens, fueling teen athletes, family dinner benefits for teens, positive food language for kids, stop labeling foods good or bad for kids, plant-based family meals, raising kids with healthy body image Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices