The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair

Today I'm talking about one of my favorite topics and one of the most important parts of becoming a healthy adult: learning how to feel your feelings. So many of us were never taught how to tune into what is happening inside of us. We learned to think, perform, push through, numb out, fix others, or disconnect from our feelings altogether. But when we do not know how to feel, we also lose connection with our intuition, empathy, self-trust, and the inner parts of us that need our attention. In this episode, I break down why feeling your feelings matters, how it helps us become whole, and why it is such an important part of healing codependency, connecting with the inner child, and becoming more emotionally intelligent. I also share practical ways to begin, including body scans, journaling, inner child work, and gently working with the parts of you that may feel blocked or resistant. Key Takeaways Feeling your feelings helps you become a more whole and connected human Many of us learned to numb, suppress, or avoid our feelings because we were never taught what to do with them Emotional intelligence is just as important as intellectual intelligence Feeling your feelings helps strengthen intuition and inner guidance Empathy grows when we are able to feel and understand our own internal experience Codependency begins to heal when we redirect our energy back to ourselves instead of constantly focusing on others Feelings only stay stuck when we attach stories, assumptions, or meaning to them Journaling can help move feelings out of the body and onto the page Inner child work is a powerful way to reconnect with your feelings Resistance to feeling is often a protective part that needs compassion, not judgment Resources from this Episode: Inner Child Meditation MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair® Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Nicole Kalil for a powerful and practical conversation about confidence. Nicole has spent years studying, researching, and teaching confidence, and she breaks it down in such a grounded way. Instead of seeing confidence as something we fake, perform, or get from the outside world, Nicole defines confidence as firm and bold trust in self. We talk about how confidence is something many of us are born with, but begin to lose as we absorb expectations, criticism, people-pleasing, perfectionism, comparison, and what Nicole calls "head trash." She shares the five confidence builders that help us rebuild trust with ourselves, including taking action, moving through fear and failure, giving ourselves grace, choosing confidence, and building internal trust one step at a time. This conversation is such a beautiful reminder that confidence is not about looking perfect or never feeling afraid. It is about knowing who you are, owning who you are not, and choosing to trust yourself as you take the next right step. Key Takeaways Confidence is not about looking confident. It is about building firm and bold trust in yourself Many of us are born trusting ourselves, but life, expectations, criticism, and social conditioning can disconnect us from that trust Confidence is built through action, especially small, consistent steps toward what matters most Failure, fear, mistakes, and doubt can build deeper confidence when we learn to move through them instead of avoid them Giving yourself grace and practicing self-compassion are essential parts of building confidence Confidence is a choice we can practice moment by moment until the feeling begins to catch up "Head trash" is the unkind and often untrue inner dialogue that chips away at our self-trust Perfectionism, comparison, overthinking, and seeking confidence externally can derail confidence Keeping commitments to yourself helps build internal trust Real confidence comes from knowing who you are, owning who you are not, and embracing all of it Resources from this Episode: Nicole Kalil's WebsiteNicole's Podcast, This Is Woman's Work MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Ashleigh DiLello, the founder and creator of BioEmotional Healing, for a powerful conversation about the brain, body, nervous system, chronic pain, trauma, and what it really takes to heal. Ashleigh shares her incredible story of becoming severely ill at just 13 years old, living between life and death for years, and eventually finding her way back to health, dance, and life. After building a successful career as a professional dancer, TV and Broadway performer, wife, and mother, she faced another life-altering health crisis after a failed hip surgery launched her body into chronic pain. We talk about how the nervous system stores our life experiences, why stress responses can show up as anxiety, perfectionism, chronic pain, autoimmune issues, gut issues, and other symptoms, and why regulating the nervous system is only part of the healing process. Key Takeaways The brain-body connection plays a major role in chronic pain, trauma, anxiety, and healing Long-term survival mode can become familiar to the nervous system, even after the original threat is gone Stress responses can show up in many ways, including pain, anxiety, perfectionism, depression, OCD behaviors, autoimmune symptoms, gut issues, and more Regulation helps calm the nervous system in the moment, but rewiring changes the deeper patterns that keep the stress response active Self-compassion is essential for nervous system rewiring because harsh self-criticism keeps the brain in a protective state Healing requires rebuilding trust with yourself, your body, and your ability to create a new identity We can honor what we have been through without allowing it to define the rest of our lives Resources from this Episode: Ashleigh DiLello's Website Free Brain-Body Blueprint Instagram: @ashleighdilello MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Jeffrey Stegman and Clayten Stedmann, the co-founders of FLFE, which stands for Focused Life Force Energy. This is such a fascinating conversation about consciousness, energy, EMFs, and what happens when we create a higher-consciousness environment in our homes, businesses, and everyday lives. Jeffrey and Clayten share the story of how FLFE began, how they came together through business coaching and consciousness work, and how this technology is designed to support a field of unconditional love in a specific location. We talk about the Hawkins Scale of Consciousness, how environments can affect our nervous system, why EMFs may be impacting us more than we realize, and how high-consciousness fields can support calm, sleep, forgiveness, emotional regulation, and a greater sense of well-being. This conversation is a beautiful reminder that we are energy first, and the spaces we live in matter more than we often realize. Key Takeaways FLFE is designed to support a high-consciousness field in a home, business, or around a cell phone Jeffrey and Clayten describe FLFE as a technology that associates focused life force energy with a specific location or identifier Our environments can deeply influence our nervous systems, emotions, sleep, focus, and overall well-being EMFs from Wi-Fi, cell phones, smart meters, appliances, and other modern technology may contribute to dysregulation for some people A high-consciousness environment can help support peace, calm, emotional regulation, and a greater ability to shift negative thoughts The Hawkins Scale of Consciousness offers a way to understand different emotional and energetic states, from shame and fear to love, peace, and enlightenment Michelle shares her personal experience using FLFE after living near power lines and noticing a major shift in her energy Consciousness work invites us to become more curious about the energy around us and how it affects our lives Resources from this Episode: FLFE Free Trial: Get your 15-day free trial here. Visit the FLFE website MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Harmony Slater for a soulful conversation about the body, the breath, energetic healing, and the hidden patterns that can keep us out of alignment with who we really are. We talk about how the body holds emotional experiences, why so many of us feel disconnected from ourselves, and how healing happens when we slow down enough to listen to what our body has been trying to tell us all along. Harmony shares her personal journey through yoga, mysticism, energy work, and healing from autoimmune symptoms and chronic fatigue. We also explore the mind-body connection, the role of the nervous system, and how unconscious beliefs, emotional patterns, and old wounds can shape the way we show up in our lives. This is a grounded and expansive conversation about coming back into wholeness through breath, awareness, and deep inner healing. In this episode, you'll learn: Harmony's journey from religious studies and philosophy into yoga, meditation, and energy work What Ashtanga yoga is and how it shaped her path How spinal energetics works and why it can be such a powerful healing modality How emotional pain, trauma, and unconscious beliefs can build up in the body over time How old experiences can create hidden patterns that still affect us today The connection between the body, the unconscious mind, and emotional healing Simple ways to use breath and nature to feel more grounded and supported each day Why spiritual practice can become another form of control if we are not aware of what is really driving it Harmony Slater is a masterful teacher, breathwork guide, spiritual mentor, and one of only a handful of certified Ashtanga yoga teachers worldwide. Her work weaves together ancient wisdom, energetic healing, nervous system support, and modern transformation to help people reconnect with themselves and live in greater alignment. Resources from this Episode: Harmony's website: harmonyslater.com Instagram: @harmonyslaterofficial Podcast: Finding Harmony MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Dr. Liz Burkholder for a real, unscripted conversation about emotions, what they're here to teach us, and how to move through them in a healthy way. We talk about anger, grief, sadness, fear, anxiety, and what happens when we keep pushing our emotions down instead of allowing them to move through us. Liz and I also explore what it means to truly hold space for ourselves and for other people, why so many of us were never taught how to feel our emotions, and how emotional repression can show up in the body, in relationships, and in everyday life. This is a powerful conversation about learning to stay present with what you feel instead of bypassing it, fixing it, or trying to make it go away. In this episode, you'll hear: Why anger is a healthy emotion and how it can help you set boundaries The difference between feeling anger and projecting it onto other people How emotions like sadness and anger can sometimes cover for each other Why grief needs space, presence, and support instead of being rushed away What anxiety and depression can reveal about unfelt emotions How emotional repression can impact the body, relationships, and nervous system What it looks like to let emotions move through you instead of storing them inside Why so many of us were never taught how to process emotions in a healthy way Liz Burkholder is the founder of Go Within Institute. She helps people heal through breathwork, subconscious work, nervous system regulation, and deep emotional processing. Her work supports clients, clinicians, and coaches in learning how to move through life with greater presence, connection, and self-trust. Resources from this Episode: GoWithin Institute | Heal Yourself Listen to Liz's podcast: We Are The Medicine Podcast MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Eric Zimmer for a grounded and honest conversation about what real change actually looks like and why lasting transformation usually doesn't happen all at once. Eric shares his powerful recovery story, what finally helped him create lasting change, and why the smallest daily choices often matter more than the big breakthrough moments we tend to chase. We talk about how to work with the parts of ourselves we'd rather avoid, what to do when we shut down, shrink, or feel overwhelmed, and why true growth comes from learning how to relate to ourselves differently over time. Eric also shares practical tools for changing the meaning we assign to situations, building wise habits, and taking small steps that add up to a meaningful life. In this episode, you'll learn: Why overnight transformation is a myth, and what actually creates lasting change How small, consistent actions can build real momentum over time What it means to befriend the parts of yourself you want to avoid How awareness helps you catch patterns like shutting down, shrinking, or going blank in real time Practical ways to regulate your nervous system and stay connected to yourself in difficult moments Why having a simple phrase prepared can help when emotions take over How to rethink overwhelm and shift out of the feeling that life is happening to you A simple 3-question tool to help you challenge discouraging thoughts and choose a more supportive perspective Resources from this Episode: Eric's website Eric's podcast: The One You Feed Eric's book: How a Little Becomes a Lot: The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Adult Chair® Certified Coach Michelle Wootten for a practical, real-life conversation about the "how-to" of healing and staying grounded when life gets messy. We talk about generational trauma, setting boundaries with toxic family members, navigating grief when relationships change, and using the Adult Chair tools to strengthen communication in marriage. Michelle shares her personal story of hitting a breaking point, how her body signaled it was time to stop, and what helped her begin healing from the inside out. You'll also hear honest insights about going no-contact with an adult child, holding grief and joy at the same time, and why trigger work is one of the most powerful paths to transformation. In this episode, you'll learn: What it really means to live in your Adult Chair How chronic stress and emotional suppression can build over time and eventually show up in the body What it can look like to set boundaries with a toxic adult child, including the grief that can come with it Why healing isn't linear and how to hold both grief and joy at the same time How trigger work can help heal generational patterns and create change for future generations How Adult Chair tools helped Michelle strengthen her marriage, especially around attachment styles and communication Resources from this Episode: Connect with Michelle Wootten on her website: https://www.michellewootten.com/ Get the Relationship Reset Course here. Listen to all of Michelle Chalfant's meditations & Inner Child work on YouTube! MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Bradley Nelson, creator of The Emotion Code and The Body Code, to talk about his newer work, The Heart Code and the powerful concept of the "heart wall." We explore how trapped emotions form, how they can impact the body and mind (including anxiety, depression, disconnection, and low self-worth), and what it can look like to clear them so you can feel more love, joy, and belonging in your life. Dr. Brad also walks me through a real, live heart wall clearing, so you can hear what the process sounds like in real time. In this episode, you'll learn: What a "heart wall" is, and why Dr. Brad believes most people have one How trapped emotions form (and why they sometimes get "stuck") The surprising link between emotional baggage and physical pain How inherited and absorbed emotions can become part of your emotional reality Why clearing emotional energy can unlock love, creativity, connection, and belonging What to expect after a heart wall release, including how the integration period can feel Resources from this Episode: Visit Dr. Bradley's website here. The Emotion Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson The Body Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson The Heart Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

Today, I'm joined by scientist, nutritionist, and emotional eating and self-sabotage coach Matty Lansdown for a real conversation about health and weight that goes way deeper than food rules. Matty shares why most of us already know what to do, but still feel stuck, and how the real shift happens when you understand the patterns underneath your choices. We talk about emotional eating, trauma and self-protection, dopamine loops, and the unsexy truth that sustainable change usually comes from building awareness first, then making small tweaks consistently, without triggering rebellion. In this episode, we explore: Why it's "not about calories or kale," it's mindset and behavior change Two common roots behind emotional eating: trauma and dopamine-driven self-soothing A simple awareness practice: track what you eat, where you eat, and what you feel "One tweak a week" and why slow change is often the only change that sticks How rebellion gets triggered by rigid plans, and how self-guided empowerment helps Why naming the emotion can quiet a craving (Michelle shares her own "potato chips" moment) Fermented foods, gut health, and how the microbiome can influence your body's set Obesogens, plastics, and common chemicals that may disrupt metabolism and hormones Resources from this Episode: Connect with Matty Lansdown: Visit Matty's website Matty's Podcast: The Real Weight Loss Coach Matty on Instagram: @the.real.weight.loss.coach MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

Today's episode is a true "sneak attack" mini-session I recorded on the spot because the shift happened so fast, I wanted you to hear it in real time. At first, I introduced my guest "JoJo" as a code name. Then we reveal the big moment: "JoJo" is actually my mom, Nancy Brindisi, and this is her first-ever time on the podcast! My mom is in that brave space of considering dating again after years, and the negative self-talk started spiraling. So I walked her through one simple practice that stopped the mental loop within minutes, and the calm that followed was unmistakable. In this episode, I share: Why negative self-talk often spikes when you're stepping into something new, especially dating again How I work with "parts" as energetic parts work (working with the energy of the judging, doubting part) A practical way to borrow supportive energy when you can't access your Adult Chair in the moment How this practice can come through as words, images, or a felt sense, and why your way is the right way MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

Today, I'm joined by Debra Martin, a certified research medium whose three near death experiences completely transformed her life. Each experience opened her to the reality of the soul, the presence of divine love, and a deeper understanding of why we are here. Debra shares how these moments awakened her spiritual gifts, led her into unexpected healing abilities, and helped her remember who we truly are beneath the human experience. Her stories offer hope, validation, and a powerful reminder that we are never alone. In this episode, we explore: What Debra experienced during her three near death experiences and how they changed her life The role of spiritual surgeons, divine intervention, and soul contracts in healing Why emotional patterns, childhood wounds, and unprocessed pain often sit beneath illness How Debra facilitates remote healing sessions and the profound results she has witnessed Why love, presence, and connection to your divine essence are essential parts of healing Resources from this Episode: Learn more about Debra Martin: https://debramartinhealer.com/ MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

In this episode, I'm joined by Elizabeth April, author of Your Anxiety Is Giving Me Anxiety. We explore a powerful reframe of anxiety, not as something to fix or eliminate, but as an intelligent signal from the nervous system pointing toward healing and deeper self-awareness. Elizabeth shares her framework for identifying whether anxiety is rooted in the past, present, or future, why high-functioning tendencies often come from overstimulation, and how her Renew Technique helps move out of survival mode and into lasting nervous system regulation, trust, and conscious awareness aligned with living from your Adult Chair. In this episode, you'll learn: Why anxiety can feel contagious and how we absorb the emotional states of others How to identify whether your anxiety is driven by past experiences, present overwhelm, or future fear Why common coping tools often manage symptoms without addressing the root cause How the Renew Technique helps you recognize, neutralize, and work with anxiety The role of physical and digital clutter in nervous system overload How to use awareness to regulate your body before anxiety escalates Why personal growth and healing often happen through challenge, not comfort Resources from this Episode: Visit Elizabeth April's website Get the book: Your Anxiety is Giving Me Anxiety Follow Elizabeth April on Instagram and Socials: @Elizabeth.April MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Adult Chair Collective https://www.michellechalfant.com/collective Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant