Help Me Be Me

A visioning practice as we close out the year. This is for making space for what is meant to come forth. This is for anyone wanting to process what is inside and position themselves for the year to come. I have lots of prompts in this one for reflecting and journaling. I also have lots of prompts for creating a vision board! A link to these prompts is linked below – in the case you want to just listen along and then do them in a journal and make a vision board later. I have been doing this myself because it’s easy to get so busy. We need a moment to checkin with where we’re at – what’s working, what needs tweaking. For me the ideal way to move through life is constantly course correcting, refining the recipe for your day, as you go. To be happy and fulfilled, we have to stop and take time to reflect on our life: what’s working and what we want to let go of. This ep is that opportunity!! Here’s Pam Grout’s book which I love: https://amzn.to/48BhwD5 Here are the prompts from this episode: https://yaywithme.squarespace.com/visioning-2025 Sponsors: Chewy: chewpanions.chewy.com/YAYWITHME to get $20 off your first order. Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Ritual: ritual.com/helpmebeme for 25% your first month TruDiagnostic: TruDiagnostic.com and use code HELPMEBEME for 20% off your entire order or subscription Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We have a finite reserve of drive, otherwise known as libido. Libido is often used to refer to sexual desire but it also refers to a psychological drive – an energy for life satisfaction. In this episode I am referring to your drive and your ibido as psychic energy in general. This is about protecting your source of drive: channeling it toward that which you truly desire on a deep, personal level. Often in life, our drive gets fractured or frustrated by the needs of others or by filling the void with things like substances. I invite you to reflect on what’s happening in your life and where your libido is currently going. It needs to be channeled toward that which is most important to you. We must create a strong and consistent “container” or safe space for ourselves to bring forth any goal. Whatever condition in your life is stealing you away from a goal – I encourage you to be active in that fight even if it is unpleasant. That is a step in the process of change. Being in the struggle is how we move planets in our life. The books I mention in the episode are here: https://amzn.to/3XkmC17 https://amzn.to/43eEyOg And this is the dreamwork book: https://amzn.to/3Xg3i5a Support our sponsors: Chewy: chewpanions.chewy.com/YAYWITHME to get $20 off your first order.Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job creditBetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month of therapy Ritual: ritual.com/helpmebeme for 25% your first month TruDiagnostic: TruDiagnostic.com and use code HELPMEBEME for 20% off your entire order or subscriptionBubs Naturals: BubsNaturals.com and use code HELPMEBEME for 20% off Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Or having enough of yourself to channel toward that which you are gifted to bring into this world. This is for those cultivating a creative dream who are struggling to get into creative flow. This episode has tools for jumpstarting a sense of inner drive that comes from knowing oneself. Where you might be right now: energetically “occupied.” Relationships take up a lot of time and remove our mental ability to think autonomously. As do jobs. In general, if we are unable to access flow it’s a sign we are spiritually taxed. Sometimes that is because life has made you neglect that part of yourself. Sometimes your creative muscles are just out of use. And other times it’s because someone hurt you and it has given you performance anxiety. Protect your energy - it is precious, the most finite resource you have. To access that place of flow and drive, we need safety and private psychic space. What I will go into in this episode is how to start to build up a routine and get moving toward your creative goal. Sponsors: Chewy: chewpanions.chewy.com/YAYWITHME to save $20 off your first order Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Headspace: Headspace.com/HELPMEBEME60 to unlock all of Headspace FREE for 60 days Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is really about living a life of meaning and being intentional in that approach to today. Tools for focusing your energy on on vibrating toward good – whatever that looks like for YOU, right now. What do you live for? Is your life designed around this thing? I don’t mean living for a job or a mission, necessarily. I also mean things like “hiking with my dog” or “mountain biking.” This episode is about returning to yourself, coming back to who you are through deliberate efforts. We are constantly recalibrating. I read a quote recently by E.L. Doctoro about writing a novel. “Writing is like driving at night in the fog. You can only see as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.' Self-work and healing is also like driving a car at night. You can make the whole trip that way, you don’t need to see it all at once. Just focus on being deliberate and intentional in how you approach today – only today, right now. We return to ourselves when we create conditions that remind us of our origins. The book I mention is here: https://amzn.to/4mcnBKM Sponsors: Chewy: chewy.com/podhelpmebeme to save $20 on your first order with free shipping Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Wayfair.com Headspace.com/HELPMEBEME60 to unlock all of Headspace FREE for 60 days TruDiagnostic.com and use code HELPMEBEME for 20% off your entire order or subscription Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you being loving or are you enabling someone to remain dysfunctional? How do you tell? If you are a person who finds you are enraged and triggered by a relationship in your life and you feel powerless, this episode is about imbalanced relationships where one person is overactive and another person is underactive and how that “sick system” self-perpetuates despite everyone having good intentions. If you are unsure whether or not you are codependent, ask yourself – do you obsess about the way another person lives their life and does it make you miserable? Are you finding yourself being put in compromising situations because of that person? This episode might be a helpful starting point. Also here are a few must-reads! Codependent No More https://amzn.to/4ooLFfW Courage to Change https://amzn.to/3HgpAzC The Dance of Anger https://amzn.to/45kZlQj Sponsors: Chewy: chewy.com/podhelpmebeme to save $20 on your first order with free shipping BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month of therapy Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Wayfair: Wayfair.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’re struggling with trying to keep a handle on your own beliefs in the face of a person with a strong ego, as in a romantic relationship or parental relationship where they talk you out of your feelings or tell you that you’re wrong, this is for you! A lot of people struggle to self-validate. You might defer to another person’s opinion or have a person in your life who talks you out of your beliefs, even if you feel strongly about them the moment you have them. When we are feeling insecure and second guessing ourselves, we are looking for grounding. In the spin – as I call it. We cannot discern the truth – it is illusive to us. We keep thinking “I feel this way! Am I wrong?” What we need to recognize in that moment of that feeling is that we need to back up from the issue and get a wider perspective. The issue is co-created by us and another person and the solution is a longer but accessible one. This episode is about creating a dose of perspective with context and tools. Often what this comes down to is we are struggling to believe our feelings and trust ourselves and often the other person is controlling us. That might be sinister or it might be totally innocent and invisible to that person. For example, it could be a person who doesn’t want you to leave them. Or it could be a parent who can’t see you any other way than a child. The reason this becomes toxic and unhealthy is when it prevents you from growth. If you have a light inside you that wants to grow, to stand on your own two feet and be the boss of yourself – then this is for you. Sponsors: Chewy: chewy.com/podhelpmebeme to save $20 on your first order with free shipping BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month of therapy Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Wayfair: Wayfair.com BOOK recos for this episode: Intimate Partners https://amzn.to/4kCyBQU Dance of Anger https://amzn.to/3Iqob9T Courage to Change https://amzn.to/44La6en Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’ve been unable to let go of a relationship or a part of you feels tethered to it, it could be in part the longing for the feeling of completeness. Breakups are also losses of routine and a feeling that we are not alone in the world. A lot of the loss is that concept of our life, not the person we are partnered with and who they are in reality. One thing we can move through as we process a breakup is the loss of that ideal: what we wanted the relationship to be, wished it would become, visualized it would be in the future. Separate from that we can respect the real reasons the relationship ended: who the other person was and why it was not sustainable. That’s what this episode is about: negotiating the two sides to a loss of a partner: the loss of the idea – the mirror we saw of ourselves. And then the loss of the other person. I think in the mourning/healing process we get confused about which feelings are coming from where, which can make closure difficult. You might have had a really bad relationship but some part of you felt reliant on it – this can be confusing in the wake of moving on. Regardless if you’re suffering I recommend therapy for this stage of healing. Sending love!! Here is the book I mentioned that I am reading: https://amzn.to/4kNQj4P Support this week’s sponsors: BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month Headspace: Headspace.com/HELPMEBEME60 to unlock all of Headspace FREE for 60 days. Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Wayfair: Wayfair.com Mint Mobile: mintmobile.com/helpmebeme - get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for complicated relationships with complicated boundaries, for example when you are stuck in a relationship you dislike, or you are dating but have gone through a life shift, so you fear choosing the wrong person. The reason I chose this topic is often when we are not fully activating our boundaries around the concepts of what we want and what rewards us, we allow a situation or another person to decide our future, for us. So something external will push us into a long-term situation that we never actively wanted or designed. When we are not fully solved as individuals, we may not know why we are not happy, what is not sitting right, and whether or not that’s “valid” for us to feel what we feel. In other words – there is a vagueness to our own feelings and we question ourselves, which keeps us more stuck in a situation. We may be emotionally ambivalent or have opposite feelings in a relationship, like dating when you are a single parent: any new relationship might bring up opposing priorities that need to be defined for a first time. Although the situations I discuss are very different, walking into them with awareness of how you feel and simply giving yourself an opportunity to process feelings can be incredibly helpful and enlightening. Heads up there are TONS of journaling prompts in this one! Support our sponsors: Gabb: gabb.com/helpmebme - for the best deals sign up today, no contract required. BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices