The Sabrina Zohar Show

Ever swing between anxious and avoidant with the same person, reaching for them one minute and running the next? That's not you being broken or "too much." In week three of the Breakups by Attachment Style series, Sabrina breaks down disorganized attachment (also called fearful avoidant attachment): the push-pull, hot-and-cold, on-again-off-again pattern that makes you feel like you're losing your mind. Learn what's actually happening in your nervous system, why your relationships keep taking this shape, and why no attachment style ever excuses how someone treats you. Inside: the research on fearful avoidant attachment in adulthood, a real story of dating someone disorganized, and what the path to earned security actually looks like (slower than 90 days, and worth every bit of it). Plus the Tool of the Week, a simple somatic state check-in to start tracking your nervous system today. If you've never fit neatly into anxious or avoidant, this one on attachment theory, nervous system regulation, and breaking the cycle is for you, baby. Pre-order Sabrina's book coming out October 2026,⁠ "Why Am I Like This?"⁠ Get your free workbook and access to the companion course after pre-ordering 'Why Am I Like This?' by filling out the form at the bottom of the page at http://sabrinazohar.com/book If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step ⁠HERE!⁠ If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself ⁠HERE!⁠ Get Ad free ⁠HERE!⁠ Watch on Spotify. Spotify subscribers get fewer ads on my video. Want to work with Sabrina? ⁠HERE!⁠ Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show ⁠HERE!⁠ Don't forget to follow ⁠Sabrina⁠ and ⁠The Sabrina Zohar Show⁠ on Instagram and ⁠Sabrina ⁠on TikTok! Video now available on ⁠YOUTUBE!⁠ Please support our sponsors! Aura has a great deal for Father’s Day, an exclusive $35-off Carver Mat at https://on.auraframes.com/SABRINA. Promo Code SABRINA Get 40% off select Lola Blankets products at Lolablankets.com by using code SABRINA at checkout. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets This episode is sponsored by Betterhelp. Get 10% off your first month of Betterhelp at betterhelp.com/sabrina Right now, Rythm is offering our listeners 15% off your first month and free shipping at RythmHealth.com/SABRINA ============================= Chapters: 00:00 Anxious and Avoidant at the Same Time 03:48 What Disorganized Attachment Is 06:36 Why You Can't Predict the Pattern 09:43 On Again Off Again Relationships 13:35 Hot and Cold Relationship Story 18:00 Why You Keep Going Back 21:00 How the Push Pull Cycle Works 25:03 What Causes Disorganized Attachment 28:55 How to Heal Fearful Avoidant 31:26 Somatic Practice to Self Regulate Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If someone keeps texting but never makes plans, says “we’ll see,” or gives just enough to keep you hooked, this episode is for you. We break down breadcrumbing and bare minimum dating, including mixed signals, strategic ambiguity, and future faking—and why inconsistency keeps your brain stuck chasing clarity instead of connection. You’ll learn how to tell the difference between someone who’s genuinely busy versus emotionally unavailable, and why ambiguity fuels anxiety and attachment loops. We also shift the focus back to you: why accepting breadcrumbs can feel familiar, how nervous system wiring and cognitive bias keep you stuck, and what actually helps you walk away without self-abandonment. This episode gives you clear language, practical scripts, and grounded tools to choose consistency over confusion in dating and relationships. Big announcement: For the first time ever, I'm hosting a live workshop and you're invited. If dating feels exhausting and you can't figure out why it keeps ending the same way, this is for you. You'll be the first to learn my new 3-step framework for understanding what's keeping you stuck and how to change it. Plus you get my implementation workbook. REGISTER HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! Please support our sponsors! Go to Quince.com/SABRINA for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Get organized, refreshed, and back on track this new year for WAY less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. This episode is sponsored by Betterhelp. Get 10% off your first month of Betterhelp at betterhelp.com/sabrina ============================= Chapters 00:00 Breadcrumbing vs Being Busy 03:50 What Bare Minimum Dating Is 07:20 Why Mixed Signals Create Attachment 11:20 Strategic Ambiguity in Dating 15:10 Future Faking Red Flags 19:00 Why Consistency Feels Boring 22:55 How Ambiguity Fuels Anxiety 26:50 When Waiting Is Self Abandonment 30:35 What To Say to a Breadcrumber 34:20 How to Stop the Breadcrumb Cycle Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, Sabrina sits down with dating expert Damona Hoffman to unpack how fairy tales, rom-coms, and modern dating apps fuel obsession, fantasy, and anxious attachment. They break down why texting chemistry, dopamine loops, and “potential” keep people stuck in confusing dating dynamics—and how to shift from chasing sparks to choosing emotional safety, clarity, and real connection. If you’re tired of mixed signals, hot-and-cold behavior, situationships, or questioning someone’s attachment style, this conversation reframes dating through grounded psychology and nervous system awareness. You’ll learn how to stop romanticizing unavailable partners, identify emotional unavailability early, and date with intention instead of fantasy—so you can build a healthy, secure relationship rooted in reality, not wishful thinking. Want to have your submission appear on a future show? Send in your stories, questions, or dating profiles to inthetrenches@sabrinazohar.com Get 'F the Fairy Tale' by Damona! If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! ============================= Chapters 00:00 – Dating Myths & Fairy Tale Fantasy 04:18 – Obsessing Over Potential vs Reality 08:12 – Texting, Dopamine & False Intimacy 13:05 – Good Morning Texts & Anxiety Loops 18:02 – Why Sparks Don’t Equal Compatibility 23:11 – Emotional Unavailability Explained 28:07 – Mixed Signals & Hot-Cold Behavior 33:02 – Attachment Styles vs Real Behavior 38:06 – Emotional Intimacy & Secure Love 42:10 – Dating With Clarity, Not Fantasy Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Heartbreak can feel like the end of everything, but it’s often the beginning of healing. In this raw episode of The Sabrina Zohar Show, Sabrina shares the three biggest heartbreaks of her life and what they taught her about anxious attachment, abandonment wounds, limerence, and self-worth. From childhood trauma to toxic relationships and loss, this episode explores how heartbreak shapes our dating patterns and beliefs about love. If you’re struggling with breakups or repeating unhealthy relationship cycles, this episode breaks down why heartbreak hurts so deeply and how healing actually begins. If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! ============================= Chapters 00:00 Heartbreak and Healing Journey 03:10 Childhood Trauma and Attachment 06:25 Emotional Neglect Core Wounds 09:40 How Trauma Shapes Dating Patterns 13:05 Limerence and Anxious Attachment 17:10 Toxic Relationships and Manipulation 21:45 Breakups, Grief, and No Contact 25:30 Losing Yourself in Relationships 29:00 Healing Core Beliefs and Self Worth 32:20 Choosing Emotionally Safe Love Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this deeply personal episode, Sabrina Zohar is joined by her longtime best friend Paige Homan to reflect on Sabrina’s growth journey from anxious attachment, dating anxiety, and emotional dysregulation to self-trust, nervous system regulation, and secure love. Through honest conversation and real-life reflection, they explore personal transformation, healing patterns in relationships, emotional maturity, and what it actually takes to evolve into a grounded, emotionally secure version of yourself over time. If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! ============================= Chapters 00:00 – Sabrina Zohar’s Anxious Dating Era and Why This Episode Matters 02:10 – Meet Paige: The Friend Who Witnessed Sabrina’s Growth Journey Firsthand 05:00 – What Sabrina Was Like During Her Anxious Attachment and Dating Anxiety Phase 08:40 – How Overthinking, Texting Anxiety, and Emotional Dysregulation Showed Up in Dating 12:30 – The Turning Point: When Sabrina Realized Her Dating Patterns Had to Change 16:15 – Childhood Trauma, Abandonment Wounds, and How They Shaped Relationships 20:10 – Nervous System Regulation, Slowing Down, and Learning Emotional Safety 25:00 – Healing vs Intellectualizing: Why Growth Only Happens in Real Relationships 30:05 – From Chaos to Self-Trust: What Secure Love Actually Looks Like Now 35:10 – The Role of Boundaries, Self-Awareness, and Accountability in Personal Growth 40:00 – What Sabrina Wishes She Could Tell Her Past Self About Healing and Love 45:10 – Proof That Change Is Possible: Reflections on Transformation and Growth Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices